Fic: Obsession 3/13
Title: Obsession
Rating: Adult
Summary: Kris never realised one friend could mean so much, until one day he sees that Adam isn’t just a friend - he’s an obsession and one he’ll do anything for.
Disclaimer: I know none of these people, nor do I own them, they own themselves. This never happened.
Other Parts
Broken by Seether featuring Amy Lee
Part 3
“How are you doing, Adam?” Kara asked noticing he was alone for the first time in three hours.
Adam smiled, he honestly like Kara because she seemed to be the one most down to earth of all the judges and approachable. Kara seemed to really care about all of the contestants, the other judges might care, but it was never actually expressed. It was normal for Kara to talk with contestants after the filming ended, offering words of encouragement.
“I’m good. So when am I going to see the doc?”
Kara smiled, “In around ten minutes, Simon’s talking to him at the moment. So what happened? Do you need to talk about it?”
“A typical gay bashing, they caught me walking back from a club. I think they were just looking for anyone alone and I was unlucky to be there. It’ll take more than homophobic cowards to break me.”
“That’s the spirit. Er...have you seen the Enquirer?” Kara said seriously.
Confused as to why it was important Adam shook his head, “No, I generally don’t read trash.”
Kara gently said, “Well, before Simon breaks the news to you in his bull in a china shop style, there’s a two page spread about you and Kris. Their supposed source is an American Idol insider who has said that you and Kris are romantically involved and that’s why he had his arm around you at the hospital.”
“What’s with everyone thinking Kris and I are fucking? We have a close friendship, no sex involved. Don’t these people have better things to do with their time than fantasise who’s fucking?”
Kara’s eye twinkled with amusement before she warned, “On that note, Simon’s coming and I suggest you be quiet before he thinks you are going to revolt.”
“Good to you walking, Adam. How are you?” Simon said expertly examining the man and seeing he was ready to scream at someone.
“Wonderful (!),” Adam said sarcastically before continuing, “What’s the point of me seeing the doctor? Everyone at the network will have a coronary at the thought of having to end the show a week early.”
“Well, yes. If you aren’t up to singing, we can do something else. Have one of those ridiculous clip shows or something. You need to see him,” Simon said indifferently as he led the way to the dressing rooms.
*******
“Hello Adam, how are you feeling?”
“Like I’ve just been beaten up,” Adam answered the doctor with a wry smirk.
“That makes sense. Are you experiencing any pain from your broken ribs?” The doctor said taking notes.
“Only when I move and breathe,” Adam said honestly.
“That’s fine. Are you still experiencing any; dizziness, queasiness or headaches?”
“No. So can I sing?”
The doctor nodded slowly, “Providing you take your painkillers on time and I recommend placing ice in your chest where the fracture is located. However you cannot go running around the stage. Fractured ribs take around six weeks to heal completely.”
“Sure, doc. Can I go now?” Adam said seriously leaving as soon as the man nodded lest the man change his mind.
“Hey Adam, so are you going to be doing the show?” Alison said anxiously.
“Yeah. How’s your duet with Danny going?”
Alison pulled a face saying, “Fine. He’s not exactly great at singing rock. Well, maybe he’d be okay with a really soft rock song. We’re doing okay though.”
“You’ll be fine, honey. Even if he messes up you’ve got your song to make everyone realise how wonderful you are.”
Alison smiled knowing she had made the right decision to wait for Adam to appear just so she could have a quick chat with him. He always made her feel better and she needed the reassurance because she was honestly worried about the duet.
“Thanks, you always know how to make me feel better.” Alison said hugging the man quickly before going back to Danny.
Adam strolled around looking for Kris, surprised the man wasn’t hanging around waiting for him. Since there was nothing he could do until Kris turned up, Adam sat down and took the chance for a bit of peace and quiet.
“Hey, how did you get on with the doc?”
Adam opened his eyes to see Kris gazing down at him with a nervous smile, he grinned back saying, “I’m good to go, of course. So are you ready to get back to work?”
“Yeah. If we’re going to go down, it may as well be in a ball of flames.”
“It’s always hot when I go down, honey,” Adam purred.
“I’m sure it is,” Kris said smirking as they approached the stage.
*******
“What do you mean, it doesn’t matter?” Katy asked her husband in confusion.
Katy couldn’t understand why he wasn’t upset about the articles when she had never been more upset in her life. She had to face her friends and family when they were all talking about her, pity in their eyes. A part of her wondered if something had really happened, as people said there was no smoke without fire.
“What they are saying is crazy but it’s not like we can stop people from thinking things.”
“Aren’t you embarrassed or disgusted?” Katy asked angrily.
Kris said bemused, “No, why should I be embarrassed about what other people think and why would I be disgusted? It’s not like I’ve got a problem with homosexuality and Adam is a wonderful guy.”
“Well, I want you to go on the radio and tell everyone that you are straight.”
“Katy, there's no need for that and I don' t want to do it,” Kris said honestly.
“Fine, I'll speak to you after the show tomorrow.” Katy said, unhappy that she couldn’t make it to the show to prove to everyone that her husband was not gay.
******
The next day Kris was pacing backstage, looking at Adam who was serenely standing against the wall. He was always amazed at how calm Adam could be when each time they could be kissing their dream goodbye. Now they had performed their solos it was time to do their duet and Kris honestly had no idea how people would take their performance since it was so different to what people would be expecting and it wasn’t a massively well known song.
Kris had agreed to go with the clothes Adam had picked out and insisted would be just perfect. So now Kris was wearing tight black jeans adorned with spikes and a black shirt with red swirls on the sleeves. He was wearing black nail polish and eyeliner but had drawn the line at lipstick.
“Hey, everything will be fine and you look amazing. We’re going to give them the performance of their lives,” Adam said with a smirk.
“We’ll definitely shock them at least. How many times do you think Simon will be lost for words?”
“Three?” Adam said thoughtfully.
Kris shook his head, “I say two, winner has to buy lunch.”
The pair shook hands on the bet before the signal came for their entrance. Kris gave a small smile as went first; he knew the rumours about them would only increase after this performance. Adam had earlier explained it was a good thing, if American Idol refused to give them publicity, the controversy over their performance would at least keep their names fresh in the audience’s mind.
Kris and Adam were on opposite sides of the stage when the spotlight hit them, accompanied by the introduction.
Prowling towards the other man Adam started singing,
“I wanted you to know
That I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain …away
I keep your photograph
And I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain”
An expression of despair on his face Adam reached out and grabbed Kris’s shoulder as if turning him to face him and Kris spun around on one heel coolly, their voices blended together like a smooth whiskey as they looked each other in the eyes singing,
“cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away”
Adam shook his head as if giving up and walked away from Kris singing,
“You've gone away
You don't feel me here....anymore”
Walking parallel to Adam on the right side of the stage Kris started singing,
“The worst is over now
And we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away”
Now slowly walking across the stage towards Kris Adam sang,
“There's so much left to learn
And no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain”
On the other side of the stage Kris turned to walk towards Adam singing,
“‘cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away”
During the instrumental, the pair walked to the very centre of the stage, with Adam facing the audience and Kris’s body angled slightly to the right so he could be seen by the cameras. Suddenly Kris fell to his knees in front of Adam as the older man looked at him singing,
“cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away”
Reaching up to Adam as if begging him to stay Kris sang,
“cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away”
Shaking his head Adam sang,
“You're gone away
You don't feel me here....anymore”
As the music ended, there was a stunned silence followed by applause, cheers and whistles. Kris stood up as the applause began, relieved that they hadn’t been booed off stage. He raised an eyebrow at Adam at the amazingly positive reaction, he had expected jeers, not whistles. He just knew Adam was going to be all smug about it later.
“Yo, Yo,” Randy said trying to talk over the noise before holding one hand up for silence before continuing, “Yo, that was dope for me. A little too theatrical for me but it worked. You could record that now and have a hit record with it.”
Kara smiled saying, “I loved it, you took a risk with the performance by making it more like one might see on Broadway but I have to disagree with Randy, it worked and made you stand out. You both deserve to be here next week based on that performance. The song may not have been heavy rock but you two can rock with the best of them.”
“Amazing. It doesn’t matter that the song isn’t well known or that it isn’t a heavy rock song, you connected emotionally with the song and the audience. Breathtakingly beautiful,” Paula said, wiping a tear from her eye.
Simon shrugged saying, “Well, what can I say? A very theatrical performance that I don’t think anyone’s going to forget. I thought your vocals were excellent. You proved that there is no need to go jumping around the stage to have a incredible performance. I'm going to predict that you will both be in the top three. Kris, for the first time I feel that that you actually have a chance to win this. You should thank Adam because he’s caused you to up your game and it’s paid off big time.”
Ryan walked out and shook both their hands saying, “Great feedback from all four of the judges, do you want to respond to that, Kris?”
“It’s amazing. We had a great time doing the song. We hope America liked the performance as well.”
Ryan smiled at the camera saying, “Here’s another look at all the performances and the numbers to phone.”
Once the montage ended Ryan closed the show saying, “That’s all folks but remember to tune in for the results.”
As the cameras switched off, the room fell into a strange silence as Kris and Adam made their way down the stage. Adam was gritting his teeth in pain, despite what he had told everyone it had been painful to sing yesterday but he had assumed that that an extra night’s sleep would make it better. It hadn’t but the painkillers had helped and at least his pain helped him put emotion into the song.
“See, I told you not to worry,” Adam said smugly, he loved being right.
“So you did. I feel sick though, the press are going to crucify us.”
“Who cares? They’ve been running polls on my sexuality since I got in the top ten. At least it gets us plenty of exposure and we need it.”
Kris nodded in understanding smiling at Kara walked over, obviously ready to bolster their spirits or give advice as she always did.
“That was a very bold performance and will probably split the votes. You know this isn’t going to help with the rumours and could be dangerous for you. The last thing I want is for another gay bashing and being high profile will just make you a bigger target.”
Adam nodded, “We had always intended to perform the song like that and why should we let some idiots control our actions. If we do, they win and I refuse to let them.”
“How’s your wife taking the rumours, Kris? Do you want me to talk to her and explain about media hype? I don’t mind.”
“It’s okay, we’ve already talked about it. I'll give her a call later and warn her about the next barrage of press.”
“Well done again boys,” Kara said as she walked away.
“Feel like getting out of here?” Kris asked, starting to feel like the room was getting smaller. He could feel everyone looking at him, judging him and trying to make him fit into a perfect little box.
“Yeah, dressing room or mansion?”
“As much as I hate to say it the dressing room in case someone wants us for an interview or something,“ Kris said with a sigh, wanting nothing more than to have some peace and quiet.
*******
Within seconds of walking into the dressing room, Adam had swallowed two painkillers and was lying on the sofa allowing his pain to show now he was away from the cameras. At least he had managed to get through the performance without anything happening, for a moment he had believed he was about to faint.
Switching on his phone Kris frowned at the five missed calls from Katy and two from his brother. He already knew what they were calling him about and he wasn’t in the mood for a lecture. If he didn’t have a problem with his performance with Adam what was wrong?
Kris looked over at Adam who was now snoring and thought how beautiful the man was. After every performance Adam seemed to be at peace, as if everything made sense for a while. He was pulled out of Adam watching by Alison bouncing into the room. Putting one hand to his lips, he gestured to Adam.
Alison looked at Kris and wondered how he could be so oblivious to his real feelings for Adam. She saw them in his eyes whenever he looked at Adam, he looked at Adam as if the man was the sun and moon to him. She knew Kris was married, his wife seemed like a wonderful person but she loved Adam and Kris like they were her brothers. She couldn’t stand the thought of them having to go through the pain of separation or going through their lives unconsciously mourning each other.
“You do know that you love Adam, right?”
Kris looked at her in shock, confused at the sudden strange topic. He couldn’t think why she was asking that, of course he loved Adam. The man was his best friend, the best friend he had ever had. He couldn’t imagine ever being this close with any of the other people he knew.
“Of course, he’s my best friend.”
Alison shook her head saying gently, “Kris, you are in love with him and you will lose him unless you do something about it.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, I'm not gay.” Kris said in disbelief.
“You don’t have to be gay, Kris. He’s just your soul mate. Just sit back and close your eyes.”
Looking at the serious expression on her face, Kris did as she asked because she wouldn’t give up otherwise. Despite her appearance, Alison could be relentless when she wanted something or thought she was right.
Lowering her voice Alison said, “Now think about how you would feel without seeing Katy ever again. Next think of how it would be never to see or talk with Adam ever again. Which one hurts you more? Who do you feel you don’t just want but need . I know I'm being harsh but I don’t want to see you both broken and alone.”
Kris closed his eyes and thought of Katy; her smile, her skin, her laugh, dancing with her, making love and just spending time with her then he thought about not experiencing those things again and his heart clenched.
Next Kris thought of Adam; his beautiful laugh, dark jokes, singing with him, dancing together in the haze of a club, the scent of his aftershave and shampoo. He thought of the joy and rightness that burned through him when he woke up with Adam. He thought about losing Adam and never experiencing any of them again and he felt like his heart had been torn apart. He could survive without Katy but he couldn’t live without Adam but did that mean he was attracted to Adam?
Kris thought about kissing Adam’s neck, of making those beautiful eyes darken with passion like they did when the man was singing. He thought about how it would feel to have Adam’s body against his own. He wanted to experience them all, Alison was right he was in love with Adam now the question was should he do anything about it and risk losing Adam’s friendship?
Opening his eyes Kris whispered embarrassed, “I never realised, how could I miss it? I can't do anything about it. Adam is too important to me to risk losing his friendship if he doesn’t feel the same.”
Knowing she was betraying a confidence but reassuring herself that it was for the best reasons Alison admitted, “Adam loves you, I see it whenever he looks at you. You have to make the first move, as far as he knows you would never be attracted to him.”
“I need to talk to him then and see if there is a chance for us.”
“You can do it tonight, I'm going out with my family, and I think Danny is as well.”
Kris nodded and placed a quick kiss on the girl’s cheek in thanks before she walked out of the room. He was continually amazed at how someone so young could be so insightful. He was also confused as to how he was going to approach Adam. He couldn’t set up some big seduction scene because that would give the wrong impression. Walking over to Adam, he looked down at the man and wondered how he could have missed how Adam made him feel alive again.
Bending down Kris whispered in the man’s ear, “Adam, it’s time to go home. Come on, we need to talk about some stuff.”
Adam opened his eyes at the strange tone on his friend’s voice he asked hurriedly, “Are you okay? Did someone upset you? Do you need me to go lecture some bitch until they cry?”
“I'm okay but I need to talk to you alone. Are you ready to go?”
“Sure, but we’ll have to take it slow, honey.”
“Anything you want,” Kris said honestly.
Kris led the way out of the corridor, frowning when he saw the crowd of people in the corridor. Walking on Adam’s right side, he gave the people no choice but to move out of the way. As soon as they stepped outside the stage, Kris was deafened by the sound of people yelling positive and negative things. The mob moved closer, hands appeared as if from nowhere trying to get within touching distance. Kris walked slightly in front, making a path for Adam to take that hopefully wouldn’t hurt him. Kris heard someone yelling and the next thing he knew, he was on the floor with his head bleeding.
Fighting his way through the suddenly tighter mob, Adam’s heart stopped at the sight of Kris lying on the floor with some tall, stocky man standing over him.
“Get the fuck away from him!” Adam snarled, pulling himself up to his full height.
Adam might be injured but there was no way this man was going to hurt Kris again. A crazy thought went through his mind that he and Kris would have matching lacerations on their heads.
“This fag is only getting what he deserves, he’s a pervert just like you. The people who attacked you should have done it properly and killed you.”
Eyes blazing Adam said lowly, “Get away him from now before I make you cry like the pathetic, weak, bitch you really are.”
The man moved back, shocked at the angry looks from the people around him. He had been sure he would be able to take them both down but something in the violence and hatred in the black haired man’s voice told him that it wouldn’t be that easy.
Adam smiled widely at Kris as the man stood up, one hand moving the blood now trickling down his face. He had anticipated their duet would get some bad reactions but he hadn’t anticipated violence. Adam was surprised there was no security as normal and contemplated that it was a decision made by the lawyers who wanted him and Kris out of the show. Adam had noticed the cameras recording them since they left the building but had ignored them since there always seemed to be cameras around.
“You okay, Kris?”
Kris nodded as they turned to carry on walking towards the car, the crowd now parting for them. He was pleased to hear people yelling their names and cheering, now there were no derogatory slurs being hurled their way. At the car, Kris got in the back, grinning when Adam sat beside him and lightly squeezed his knee. He just hoped Adam would still be willing to talk when they arrived home because he didn’t know how long his courage would last or when the others would be back.
End Part 3