Strange Craving For Pink Stickypads
Night is such a strange time of day for me.
Its the only time Im ever truly alone with myself. Mostly I listen to a cornicopia of emotive music that Ive collected over the years probably because they reflect me in someway. It's almost comforting, yet there doesn't seem to be much comfort these days. I dont mean that in a "hey Im a kid crying for attention/help because ______ has arbitrarily effected my mood for ____ amount of time, yet I dont have the fore sight to see the significance/truth." I feel like I have a little monster in my belly slowly eating something, I dont know what, and thats probably part of what is perpetuating it all. No, that's a lie, I am scared to realize my own weaknesses. I constantly fill myself with distractions, this is one of them infact, and its all to avoid a single realization. At night, everything is so quiet, all the colors fade, everyone goes to bed and its just me.
Sorry, got lost in the music for a minute.
I dont think I would call this being moody, because really this is just how I always am at this time of day, Im just being open. I guess you could say I am just as predictable as the sun, by sunrise I will have been revived and the cycle will be started once more, like a Phoenix in its inevitable journey through life.
I wish you could all hear what I am right now, it's so beautiful, and beauty is a wonderful thing. Remember that, and remember that all answers lie within... My wish bracelet is almost broken, yet I never made any wishes, I dont want to gain anything... just to lose and by losing gaining so much more.
Its the only time Im ever truly alone with myself. Mostly I listen to a cornicopia of emotive music that Ive collected over the years probably because they reflect me in someway. It's almost comforting, yet there doesn't seem to be much comfort these days. I dont mean that in a "hey Im a kid crying for attention/help because ______ has arbitrarily effected my mood for ____ amount of time, yet I dont have the fore sight to see the significance/truth." I feel like I have a little monster in my belly slowly eating something, I dont know what, and thats probably part of what is perpetuating it all. No, that's a lie, I am scared to realize my own weaknesses. I constantly fill myself with distractions, this is one of them infact, and its all to avoid a single realization. At night, everything is so quiet, all the colors fade, everyone goes to bed and its just me.
Sorry, got lost in the music for a minute.
I dont think I would call this being moody, because really this is just how I always am at this time of day, Im just being open. I guess you could say I am just as predictable as the sun, by sunrise I will have been revived and the cycle will be started once more, like a Phoenix in its inevitable journey through life.
I wish you could all hear what I am right now, it's so beautiful, and beauty is a wonderful thing. Remember that, and remember that all answers lie within... My wish bracelet is almost broken, yet I never made any wishes, I dont want to gain anything... just to lose and by losing gaining so much more.