beast: hyunseung and kikwang
anonymous
January 16 2011, 06:07:12 UTC
uh yeah. apparently i can only write tragic beast fic. ty again to OP for the prompt ♥
--
"You're such a-- why are you--"
Hyunseung idly watches Kikwang's face crumple. He contemplates how Kikwang's always been too emotional, and how ridiculous he looks weeping like a baby in his soldier's uniform. In the face of it, Hyunseung, who has been relegated to a paper-thin hospital gown, feels deader than ever. He wants to say 'calm down' or even, 'it's okay', but he can't, not when he's spent the last week planning how exactly he'll manage to kill himself, preferably without letting any of his few friends (or, God forbid, his sister and mother) catch on.
(Kikwang, Hyunseung had been thankful to remember, was not good at catching onto things, but he was still eerily good at reading Hyunseung's mood even when Hyunseung himself didn't understand what he was feeling. That might be... a problem.)
Hyunseung keeps a straight face.
"I hate you," Kikwang finally spits out and then he's kneeling and grasping what's left of Hyunseung's knees. Hyunseung wants to apologise, except he doesn't know for that. Kikwang takes Hyunseung's hand and carefully turns the palm over and kisses his wrist. His face is still wet and pale, and Hyunseung feels a twinge of something. It's gone a moment later. "I wish you hadn't," Kikwang murmurs, and Hyunseung's sliding his other hand against the back of Kikwang's neck. Kikwang closes his eyes and sighs, and Hyunseung knows it's an awkward moment and that they're probably, maybe, definitely, not together any more if they ever even were, but he wants to kiss Kikwang anyway. That's worrisome. "I would rather have died--" and Hyunseung's shakes his head and leans back and stares at the ceiling because he can't bear to look at Kikwang right now, or to think. Kikwang continues: "I wish I had died, instead of-- I don't know why you-- you--" Hyunseung can feel Kikwang shaking again under his hands, and swallows down a lump of... something. "Hyunseung," Kikwang says in a tiny voice. "You won't be able to dance anymore."
^ anons, you are lovely
anonymous
January 16 2011, 07:18:01 UTC
seriously, thank you so much for reading and for your amazing replies to this melodramatic piece of nonsense, omg.
to the anon who asked about me continuing it, ihni where it would go since it seems pretty... final, i guess, but er, i'll never say never? ty so much again guys, you've spoiled me ♥
--
"You're such a-- why are you--"
Hyunseung idly watches Kikwang's face crumple. He contemplates how Kikwang's always been too emotional, and how ridiculous he looks weeping like a baby in his soldier's uniform. In the face of it, Hyunseung, who has been relegated to a paper-thin hospital gown, feels deader than ever. He wants to say 'calm down' or even, 'it's okay', but he can't, not when he's spent the last week planning how exactly he'll manage to kill himself, preferably without letting any of his few friends (or, God forbid, his sister and mother) catch on.
(Kikwang, Hyunseung had been thankful to remember, was not good at catching onto things, but he was still eerily good at reading Hyunseung's mood even when Hyunseung himself didn't understand what he was feeling. That might be... a problem.)
Hyunseung keeps a straight face.
"I hate you," Kikwang finally spits out and then he's kneeling and grasping what's left of Hyunseung's knees. Hyunseung wants to apologise, except he doesn't know for that. Kikwang takes Hyunseung's hand and carefully turns the palm over and kisses his wrist. His face is still wet and pale, and Hyunseung feels a twinge of something. It's gone a moment later. "I wish you hadn't," Kikwang murmurs, and Hyunseung's sliding his other hand against the back of Kikwang's neck. Kikwang closes his eyes and sighs, and Hyunseung knows it's an awkward moment and that they're probably, maybe, definitely, not together any more if they ever even were, but he wants to kiss Kikwang anyway. That's worrisome. "I would rather have died--" and Hyunseung's shakes his head and leans back and stares at the ceiling because he can't bear to look at Kikwang right now, or to think. Kikwang continues: "I wish I had died, instead of-- I don't know why you-- you--" Hyunseung can feel Kikwang shaking again under his hands, and swallows down a lump of... something. "Hyunseung," Kikwang says in a tiny voice. "You won't be able to dance anymore."
--
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to the anon who asked about me continuing it, ihni where it would go since it seems pretty... final, i guess, but er, i'll never say never? ty so much again guys, you've spoiled me ♥
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