shinee, onkey (1/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:07:03 UTC
jinki is sure it's kind of wrong to feel this way, but he can't help it. all these years he's worked so hard to earn kibum's love that when kibum finally gives his heart to him, wholly and unconditionally, he isn't sure what to do next.
what do you do with a person's heart, anyway? lock it up in a glass container and admire it from the living room couch? display it to the world for all to see, like some sort of hard-earned prize trophy? hide it in your deepest cabinet so that no one can take it from you?
it's a very serious thing, this owning-someone-else's-heart business. being the leader of a five-man-band composed of five rowdy boys is a piece of cake compared to this. (it doesn't make it easier to round them up just in time to catch the company van each morning, though.)
jinki browses through the nearby bookstore for an idiot's guide to owning a heart. there's a manual for everything -- conversational chinese, playing the guitar, amazing sex (jinki stares at that one for a while before quickly moving on, praying that the little old lady at the counter didn't notice him lingering there), leadership (he almost picks that one up instead), drawing (he briefly considers giving a copy to kibum and taemin, but he rather likes his kneecaps intact, thank you very much) -- everything but taking care of a heart. it figures.
he ends up on the couch one rare free afternoon, kibum's heart cupped in his hands. it's looking a little paler than usual, fluttering slowly against his palm, and jinki wonders if he should have watered it every day.
kibum wanders out of their communal bedroom and squawks indignantly at the scene. "lee jinki, what do you think you are doing?" he demands, stalking over to the couch and brandishing a washcloth in jinki's face.
jinki instinctively rears back from the terrifying sight, clutching the heart to his chest. "i'msorrykibum, i-i don't know how to takecareofyourheartbutpleasedon'ttakeitawayipromiseicanlearnjusttellmehow-"
Re: shinee, onkey (2/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:08:41 UTC
kibum stares at him incredulously, brain working furiously to comprehend jinki's blabbering. "wait," he holds up his hand, effectively putting a stop to jinki's ranting, "you don't know how to take care of my heart?"
"...well, i've never owned someone else's before. i haven't really had a lot of practice with one, so i don't really know what to do with it--"
"do you want me to take it back?" kibum asks irritably, reaching out for his heart.
"no! no, i like having your heart!" jinki yells, unnecessarily loudly, and flushes upon realizing what he had exclaimed.
kibum gives him one of those what-am-i-going-to-do-with-you looks and sits down on the couch next to him. jinki relaxes a little, but holds the heart warily, expecting kibum to snatch it out of his hands at any moment.
"you don't have to think about it too hard, you know," kibum suddenly says. "having someone else's heart isn't like dancing or... cooking chicken or whatever. you don't need practice with it."
"but what if i drop it?"
"you'd better not," kibum glares, and jinki nods furiously. his look softens, and he reaches out for the heart again. "here, let me just--"
"no, don't take it back!" jinki wails.
"i'm not going to take it back!" kibum frowns. "when i gave it to you, i gave it to you completely! i'm not the kind of person who takes back gifts, you know!"
"i'm sure you aren't," jinki murmurs, but it's like a burden has been lifted from his chest. his own heart feels infinitely lighter, and the feeling is so strange and wonderful that he doesn't protest when kibum gently lifts his heart out of his palms and cradles it between his.
"if you're so worried about what to do with it, why don't we exchange?" kibum offers shyly. "that way, you'll only have one heart to take care of, and... yeah."
jinki stares at him in wonderment. his heart beats furiously against his ribcage, demanding to be freed. "that sounds like a good idea."
---
supposedly, this was based off the third prompt, but then it mutated into this. ._.
Re: shinee, onkey (2/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:12:49 UTC
OMG anon this is so cute i just realized how much i miss reading onkey :( omg ;____;
first of all this literal taking of hearts idea is beyond adorable, i'm in love with that ♥
and then your descriptions, your tone, it's all so lovely
it's looking a little paler than usual, fluttering slowly against his palm, and jinki wonders if he should have watered it every day.
:( this is so cute :( i like the ideas you associate with everything, the looking for self-help books, the preciousness of the entire piece.
and then:
"no, don't take it back!" jinki wails.
"i'm not going to take it back!" kibum frowns. "when i gave it to you, i gave it to you completely! i'm not the kind of person who takes back gifts, you know!"
this just makes so much sense to me, this dialogue right here. kibum being a person that does things completely and jinki not knowing what to do with the heart but not wanting to give it back and ugh ♥ my heart ;___; also the ending omg ;________________________; precious!!!!!
okay i'm done rambling incoherently, here is my heart, please water it :( --> ♥
Re: shinee, onkey (2/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:19:08 UTC
eeeee thank you, anon! ♥
i'll have to give credit to diana wynne jones for that. i've recently gotten into howl's moving castle and the idea somehow wormed its way onto here, haha.
i'm really glad you liked it! i haven't written in a while, so i feel awfully rusty and i had all these doubts about how jinki and kibum turned out, but i'm happy you got the feelings the story was trying to convey and that you enjoyed it! ♥
Re: shinee, onkey (2/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:38:51 UTC
negl this so bad im just gonna give you a pat for your effort on going for combining cute and what i assume to be an attempt at purple prose. no sane person will openly engage in a conversation about "taking care of one's heart", unless s/he's intentionally going for playful banter. which in all honesty i think key would never ever be caught doing, let alone with onew of all people.
Re: shinee, onkey (2/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:44:28 UTC
it wasn't really an attempt at purple prose - i think i was going more for fantasy/surreal, but i guess the situation is too far removed for a kpop fic considering it was still kind of based in a real situation. thank you for your honest opinion!
Re: shinee, onkey (2/2)
anonymous
December 12 2010, 17:04:16 UTC
"i'm not going to take it back!" kibum frowns. "when i gave it to you, i gave it to you completely! i'm not the kind of person who takes back gifts, you know!"
"i'm sure you aren't," jinki murmurs, but it's like a burden has been lifted from his chest. his own heart feels infinitely lighter, and the feeling is so strange and wonderful that he doesn't protest when kibum gently lifts his heart out of his palms and cradles it between his.
"if you're so worried about what to do with it, why don't we exchange?" kibum offers shyly. "that way, you'll only have one heart to take care of, and... yeah."
jinki stares at him in wonderment. his heart beats furiously against his ribcage, demanding to be freed. "that sounds like a good idea."
i... i... glares at you anon WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME
why is onkey doing this to me??? ;~; what am i to do with my own heart?
2pm, taeckhun
anonymous
December 12 2010, 14:17:10 UTC
"stop," khun gasps, arching up, but taecyeon doesn't. his teeth drag across khun's throat and then down, to a chest that khun knows is just as pale but nowhere near as defined, to legs that khun knows are just as lean, but far too long.
taecyeon reaches out, rubs and then tugs, and khun moans. taecyeon leans over him, grins--and then it disappears, something like realisation crossing his features. he blinks, frowns, lets go, moves away so there's no contact. like it would kill him if there was.
khun is used to this. he wishes he wasn't. he sits up, dares to get closer.
"stop," khun says, reaching over, but taecyeon doesn't.
first time in a challenge, and this was all i got ;___; based off the second prompt, but idk
kibum doesn't think anything of it. jonghyun's adoring gazes, the fingers that splay across the back of his neck, straying to play with the metal in his ears- he's used to all of that. when he goes to the jongkey couple forum (just for laughs- there are seriously some insane people there) and fans call jonghyun a lovesick puppy, kibum laughs at how it's all so true. "that's right," he says to himself, swelling a bit in self-importance.
but then it all ends- not suddenly but gradually, like jonghyun was trying to ease him out of something kibum didn't even know he was in. it starts small- jonghyun doesn't put his arm around kibum as often, which kibum doesn't mind at all because it makes jonghyun look ridiculous and even shorter than he is, and then they start hanging out less, until the only time kibum sees jonghyun is back at the dormitories, flopping down on the bed with a silly grin on his face. it doesn't take long for kibum to find out that jonghyun has a girlfriend, but he never thought that girls would affect them. jonghyun and him aren't like that, no matter what legions of crazed fans might claim. its just. kibum thought they were friends.
"i thought we were friends," kibum says to jonghyun, after a long day of filming for a music program. jonghyun looks tired and distant, but he manages a half-smile, and claps kibum on the back as he walks past. the touch is so foreign that kibum flinches. "what are you talking about? of course we are. good work today."
it's only after jonghyun has disappeared from kibum's sight that he realizes the only time jonghyun ever touches him anymore is in front of the cameras. something clicks into place and his chest constricts, suddenly, but kibum refuses to let tears fall. he has nothing if his pride, after all. kibum just wishes that jonghyun had given him a heads-up before he decided to stop loving him.
everything seems normal until you get to know them
sometimes, even though you're having a good time,
you can't help but to stop and think about
how much you miss the old times
the scariest part in being loved by someone is the uncertainty
that they may stop anytime
bonus:
when i die, the cat gets everything
i hope this challenge inspires something! post whatever you wrote @ 9:45 :) good luck!
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what do you do with a person's heart, anyway? lock it up in a glass container and admire it from the living room couch? display it to the world for all to see, like some sort of hard-earned prize trophy? hide it in your deepest cabinet so that no one can take it from you?
it's a very serious thing, this owning-someone-else's-heart business. being the leader of a five-man-band composed of five rowdy boys is a piece of cake compared to this. (it doesn't make it easier to round them up just in time to catch the company van each morning, though.)
jinki browses through the nearby bookstore for an idiot's guide to owning a heart. there's a manual for everything -- conversational chinese, playing the guitar, amazing sex (jinki stares at that one for a while before quickly moving on, praying that the little old lady at the counter didn't notice him lingering there), leadership (he almost picks that one up instead), drawing (he briefly considers giving a copy to kibum and taemin, but he rather likes his kneecaps intact, thank you very much) -- everything but taking care of a heart. it figures.
he ends up on the couch one rare free afternoon, kibum's heart cupped in his hands. it's looking a little paler than usual, fluttering slowly against his palm, and jinki wonders if he should have watered it every day.
kibum wanders out of their communal bedroom and squawks indignantly at the scene. "lee jinki, what do you think you are doing?" he demands, stalking over to the couch and brandishing a washcloth in jinki's face.
jinki instinctively rears back from the terrifying sight, clutching the heart to his chest. "i'msorrykibum, i-i don't know how to takecareofyourheartbutpleasedon'ttakeitawayipromiseicanlearnjusttellmehow-"
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"...well, i've never owned someone else's before. i haven't really had a lot of practice with one, so i don't really know what to do with it--"
"do you want me to take it back?" kibum asks irritably, reaching out for his heart.
"no! no, i like having your heart!" jinki yells, unnecessarily loudly, and flushes upon realizing what he had exclaimed.
kibum gives him one of those what-am-i-going-to-do-with-you looks and sits down on the couch next to him. jinki relaxes a little, but holds the heart warily, expecting kibum to snatch it out of his hands at any moment.
"you don't have to think about it too hard, you know," kibum suddenly says. "having someone else's heart isn't like dancing or... cooking chicken or whatever. you don't need practice with it."
"but what if i drop it?"
"you'd better not," kibum glares, and jinki nods furiously. his look softens, and he reaches out for the heart again. "here, let me just--"
"no, don't take it back!" jinki wails.
"i'm not going to take it back!" kibum frowns. "when i gave it to you, i gave it to you completely! i'm not the kind of person who takes back gifts, you know!"
"i'm sure you aren't," jinki murmurs, but it's like a burden has been lifted from his chest. his own heart feels infinitely lighter, and the feeling is so strange and wonderful that he doesn't protest when kibum gently lifts his heart out of his palms and cradles it between his.
"if you're so worried about what to do with it, why don't we exchange?" kibum offers shyly. "that way, you'll only have one heart to take care of, and... yeah."
jinki stares at him in wonderment. his heart beats furiously against his ribcage, demanding to be freed. "that sounds like a good idea."
---
supposedly, this was based off the third prompt, but then it mutated into this. ._.
Reply
first of all this literal taking of hearts idea is beyond adorable, i'm in love with that ♥
and then your descriptions, your tone, it's all so lovely
it's looking a little paler than usual, fluttering slowly against his palm, and jinki wonders if he should have watered it every day.
:( this is so cute :( i like the ideas you associate with everything, the looking for self-help books, the preciousness of the entire piece.
and then:
"no, don't take it back!" jinki wails.
"i'm not going to take it back!" kibum frowns. "when i gave it to you, i gave it to you completely! i'm not the kind of person who takes back gifts, you know!"
this just makes so much sense to me, this dialogue right here. kibum being a person that does things completely and jinki not knowing what to do with the heart but not wanting to give it back and ugh ♥ my heart ;___; also the ending omg ;________________________; precious!!!!!
okay i'm done rambling incoherently, here is my heart, please water it :( --> ♥
Reply
i'll have to give credit to diana wynne jones for that. i've recently gotten into howl's moving castle and the idea somehow wormed its way onto here, haha.
i'm really glad you liked it! i haven't written in a while, so i feel awfully rusty and i had all these doubts about how jinki and kibum turned out, but i'm happy you got the feelings the story was trying to convey and that you enjoyed it! ♥
/waters your heart lovingly ;3;
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but thank you so much, eeeee ♥
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"i'm sure you aren't," jinki murmurs, but it's like a burden has been lifted from his chest. his own heart feels infinitely lighter, and the feeling is so strange and wonderful that he doesn't protest when kibum gently lifts his heart out of his palms and cradles it between his.
"if you're so worried about what to do with it, why don't we exchange?" kibum offers shyly. "that way, you'll only have one heart to take care of, and... yeah."
jinki stares at him in wonderment. his heart beats furiously against his ribcage, demanding to be freed. "that sounds like a good idea."
i... i... glares at you anon WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME
why is onkey doing this to me??? ;~; what am i to do with my own heart?
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taecyeon reaches out, rubs and then tugs, and khun moans. taecyeon leans over him, grins--and then it disappears, something like realisation crossing his features. he blinks, frowns, lets go, moves away so there's no contact. like it would kill him if there was.
khun is used to this. he wishes he wasn't. he sits up, dares to get closer.
"stop," khun says, reaching over, but taecyeon doesn't.
first time in a challenge, and this was all i got ;___; based off the second prompt, but idk
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but then it all ends- not suddenly but gradually, like jonghyun was trying to ease him out of something kibum didn't even know he was in. it starts small- jonghyun doesn't put his arm around kibum as often, which kibum doesn't mind at all because it makes jonghyun look ridiculous and even shorter than he is, and then they start hanging out less, until the only time kibum sees jonghyun is back at the dormitories, flopping down on the bed with a silly grin on his face. it doesn't take long for kibum to find out that jonghyun has a girlfriend, but he never thought that girls would affect them. jonghyun and him aren't like that, no matter what legions of crazed fans might claim. its just. kibum thought they were friends.
"i thought we were friends," kibum says to jonghyun, after a long day of filming for a music program. jonghyun looks tired and distant, but he manages a half-smile, and claps kibum on the back as he walks past. the touch is so foreign that kibum flinches. "what are you talking about? of course we are. good work today."
it's only after jonghyun has disappeared from kibum's sight that he realizes the only time jonghyun ever touches him anymore is in front of the cameras. something clicks into place and his chest constricts, suddenly, but kibum refuses to let tears fall. he has nothing if his pride, after all. kibum just wishes that jonghyun had given him a heads-up before he decided to stop loving him.
(based on the third prompt)
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despite my disagreeing with your characterization of key, this still made me really, really sad.
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