I'm Sorry
Title: I'm Sorry
Pairing: broken!JongKey, bff!TaeKey, bff!JongTae
Genre: Angst, again. :D
Rating: PG
Summary: Smiling as if there is nothing wrong, please come back to me.
A/N: Another angst from me. I hope you don't mind. :D Sequel to { When This Door Closes} but can stand alone. :D Dedicated to my umma, pandragonriyong ! Because she likes my angst. :D
From the sadness of sending you away
I empty the full glass
Already drunk
He stays there on his seat, emptying yet another full glass. He drowns his sorrows, ignoring the spin of the room around him. He does nothing to stop his tears. He does nothing to feel better. Instead, he sobs. He sobs as he stares at the spot Kibum left. He sobs as he remembers Kibum-his words.
Like this, I miss you.
He orders another glass as he thinks back on his actions. He gulps it down as his eyes sting once more. He buries his face in his palms as he starts regretting. He regrets pushing Kibum away. He regrets sending Kibum away. He regrets being so stupid.
He dials a number on his phone, trying his best to hold in his tears.
“Hello?”
“Taemin-ah,” He answers, failing to keep his voice normal. “C-can I come over?”
“Of course, hyung!” Taemin says on the other line, voice full of worry.
He hangs up and walks. He walks all the way to the other end of the town. He walks and reminisces. He walks and thinks of memories. He remembers Kibum. He remembers their fingers intertwined, their hands swaying, as they make their way to Taemin’s. He remembers giving Kibum his favorite jacket because it was cold. He remembers Kibum hugging him because of the jacket. It was Jonghyun’s favorite jacket, and that jacket symbolized their relationship.
Taemin immediately runs towards him. He leans on Taemin as they make their way up to Taemin’s unit. He collapses on the floor as they enter. He feels Taemin sit beside him. His head immediately falls on the younger’s shoulder, eyes stinging once again.
Taemin keeps silent, because at times like this, he needs to be. He needs to be mature. He needs to be strong enough to support both of his friends. He hears his hyung muttering. He hears incoherent mumbles in between sobs.
Why didn’t I get a hold of you back then?
Looking at myself, regretting after sending you away
Taemin feels his heart breaking at the sight of Jonghyun being so vulnerable. He thinks back on the night before. He thinks back, remembering how Kibum barged into his room and cried-exactly the same as how Jonghyun was crying beside him. He remembers Kibum breaking down and sobbing the whole night.
Kibum kicks the door open and runs to Taemin, eyes red and swollen. He lies down beside the maknae on his bed and cries. He buries his face in Taemin’s chest and sobs. Taemin takes a deep breath and envelopes his umma in a tight and comforting hug. He hugs Kibum tight and lets him cry. He listens to Kibum as he tells him what’s wrong.
“Jonghyun wanted me back.” Kibum sobs. “And I walked away. I let him go again.”
Taemin offers no words of consolation. Instead, he holds Kibum tighter and lets him cry. He keeps silent and pats Kibum’s back softly. He keeps silent, because though he could say it would be okay, he knows it won’t. He keeps silent, because though he can tell Kibum he did the right thing, he knows that it would make his hyung cry harder. He keeps silent, because he knew that being there for Kibum was already enough. He doesn’t want to be an adviser, or a teacher. He only wants to be a friend to listen, to cry on, and to be there. Kibum looks up at Taemin, feeling somewhat embarrassed for his state.
“Taemin-ah-“
“Just cry, hyung.” Taemin smiles softly. “I’m here for you.”
Remembering this, Taemin sits with his back against the wall. Jonghyun, still crying, looks up at him. Taemin smiles softly again and offers a hug. Jonghyun accepts and cries more. He cries into Taemin’s shoulders again, not thinking about anything except Kibum. Not thinking about anything except Kibum’s back as he left.
No matter how much I call and call again you aren’t here
Just me who is crumbling without you is left here
They sit there in silence once Jonghyun’s tears had dried up. Taemin stands up and leaves to buy food for his hyung. Jonghyun sits up and thinks hard. He grabs his hair and pulls on it, feeling the pain of the memories haunting him. He looks up and sees Kibum’s face everywhere. He looks up and feels his tears roll down his cheeks again.
Jonghyun leans against the wall and takes out his phone. He flips it open and hits speed dial number one. He listens to the ringing. He listens as he was sent to voicemail. He listens as the line beeps for him to leave a message.
He hangs up and calls again. He tries and tries and tries, but Kibum doesn’t pick up. He isn’t here. He won’t be here again. Jonghyun thinks of this and collapses to the floor. He holds his phone tight before throwing it hard against the wall. He throws it against the wall and screams. He screams until his heart is satisfied. He screams out his pain as he sees his memories with Kibum play endlessly in his thoughts.
Smiling as if there is nothing wrong
Please come back to me
Taemin runs to the mart across the street, lips pursed into a thin line. He stops when he sees Kibum sulking in a corner. He stops when he sees Kibum’s hand wrapped in a bandage. He stops when he sees Kibum’s hand holding a plastic bag.
Kibum walks towards him, a small smile painted on his face. Taemin meets him halfway. Kibum hands over the plastic bag to Taemin.
“Hyung, your hand-“
“Don’t mind it, Taemin.” Kibum laughs half-heartedly. “It was an ‘in the spur of the moment’ kind of thing.”
“Hyung-“
“Those are all of Jonghyun’s favorite food.” Kibum smiles as tears cloud his eyes again. “And his meds are there too. Make sure he drinks them, okay? And-“
“Why are you doing this, hyung?” Taemin purses his lips again.
“Taemin, you are my best friend. You are Jonghyun’s best friend too. I trust you, Taemin. Please take care of him while he tries to get back up on his own two feet. Promise me, Taemin.” Kibum stares deep into the maknae’s eyes, waiting for him to reply.
“I promise hyung.”
Kibum smiles and a tear rolls down his cheek. “And this-“ Kibum pulls out a black jacket from his bag. “This is his favorite jacket.”
“Hyung!” Taemin shouts. He shouts because he knows the story behind the jacket. He shouts because he knows what that jacket means. He shouts because he didn’t believe it was all over-not until Kibum placed the jacket on his shoulder.
“I know that you know what the jacket means, Taeminnie.” Kibum tries to fight back his tears but ultimately fails. “Take care of it, okay? Get it back to Jjong safely, okay? He loves this jacket a lot. Give it to him and tell him-tell him-“
Taemin watches as Kibum bows his head. “Tell him thank you.” He continues as his voice cracks.
I still regret a lot. I wanna I wanna turn back time
As Kibum runs away, Taemin finds himself sitting on a bench in the park. He bends his head low and weeps. He weeps for his best friends. He weeps for himself. He weeps because of the pain of seeing people close to him breaking down. He weeps because he can’t stand seeing people he loves break down in front of him.
After much thought, Taemin jumps up and walks back home. He jumps up and wipes his tears. He smiles and clears his head. He smiles and prepares to be the best friend he is expected to be. He tries to be cheerful because he can’t be sad. He can’t be sad and cry. He can’t, especially when his best friends are vulnerable and broken. He has to stay strong for his best friends. Because if he who is watching from the side already feels this bad, he can’t imagine how painful it is for the people who are going through this first-hand.
A/N: Ummaaaaaaaaaa! This is for you. <3 Ehehe. XD
Pairing: broken!JongKey, bff!TaeKey, bff!JongTae
Genre: Angst, again. :D
Rating: PG
Summary: Smiling as if there is nothing wrong, please come back to me.
A/N: Another angst from me. I hope you don't mind. :D Sequel to { When This Door Closes} but can stand alone. :D Dedicated to my umma, pandragonriyong ! Because she likes my angst. :D
From the sadness of sending you away
I empty the full glass
Already drunk
He stays there on his seat, emptying yet another full glass. He drowns his sorrows, ignoring the spin of the room around him. He does nothing to stop his tears. He does nothing to feel better. Instead, he sobs. He sobs as he stares at the spot Kibum left. He sobs as he remembers Kibum-his words.
Like this, I miss you.
He orders another glass as he thinks back on his actions. He gulps it down as his eyes sting once more. He buries his face in his palms as he starts regretting. He regrets pushing Kibum away. He regrets sending Kibum away. He regrets being so stupid.
He dials a number on his phone, trying his best to hold in his tears.
“Hello?”
“Taemin-ah,” He answers, failing to keep his voice normal. “C-can I come over?”
“Of course, hyung!” Taemin says on the other line, voice full of worry.
He hangs up and walks. He walks all the way to the other end of the town. He walks and reminisces. He walks and thinks of memories. He remembers Kibum. He remembers their fingers intertwined, their hands swaying, as they make their way to Taemin’s. He remembers giving Kibum his favorite jacket because it was cold. He remembers Kibum hugging him because of the jacket. It was Jonghyun’s favorite jacket, and that jacket symbolized their relationship.
Taemin immediately runs towards him. He leans on Taemin as they make their way up to Taemin’s unit. He collapses on the floor as they enter. He feels Taemin sit beside him. His head immediately falls on the younger’s shoulder, eyes stinging once again.
Taemin keeps silent, because at times like this, he needs to be. He needs to be mature. He needs to be strong enough to support both of his friends. He hears his hyung muttering. He hears incoherent mumbles in between sobs.
Why didn’t I get a hold of you back then?
Looking at myself, regretting after sending you away
Taemin feels his heart breaking at the sight of Jonghyun being so vulnerable. He thinks back on the night before. He thinks back, remembering how Kibum barged into his room and cried-exactly the same as how Jonghyun was crying beside him. He remembers Kibum breaking down and sobbing the whole night.
Kibum kicks the door open and runs to Taemin, eyes red and swollen. He lies down beside the maknae on his bed and cries. He buries his face in Taemin’s chest and sobs. Taemin takes a deep breath and envelopes his umma in a tight and comforting hug. He hugs Kibum tight and lets him cry. He listens to Kibum as he tells him what’s wrong.
“Jonghyun wanted me back.” Kibum sobs. “And I walked away. I let him go again.”
Taemin offers no words of consolation. Instead, he holds Kibum tighter and lets him cry. He keeps silent and pats Kibum’s back softly. He keeps silent, because though he could say it would be okay, he knows it won’t. He keeps silent, because though he can tell Kibum he did the right thing, he knows that it would make his hyung cry harder. He keeps silent, because he knew that being there for Kibum was already enough. He doesn’t want to be an adviser, or a teacher. He only wants to be a friend to listen, to cry on, and to be there. Kibum looks up at Taemin, feeling somewhat embarrassed for his state.
“Taemin-ah-“
“Just cry, hyung.” Taemin smiles softly. “I’m here for you.”
Remembering this, Taemin sits with his back against the wall. Jonghyun, still crying, looks up at him. Taemin smiles softly again and offers a hug. Jonghyun accepts and cries more. He cries into Taemin’s shoulders again, not thinking about anything except Kibum. Not thinking about anything except Kibum’s back as he left.
No matter how much I call and call again you aren’t here
Just me who is crumbling without you is left here
They sit there in silence once Jonghyun’s tears had dried up. Taemin stands up and leaves to buy food for his hyung. Jonghyun sits up and thinks hard. He grabs his hair and pulls on it, feeling the pain of the memories haunting him. He looks up and sees Kibum’s face everywhere. He looks up and feels his tears roll down his cheeks again.
Jonghyun leans against the wall and takes out his phone. He flips it open and hits speed dial number one. He listens to the ringing. He listens as he was sent to voicemail. He listens as the line beeps for him to leave a message.
He hangs up and calls again. He tries and tries and tries, but Kibum doesn’t pick up. He isn’t here. He won’t be here again. Jonghyun thinks of this and collapses to the floor. He holds his phone tight before throwing it hard against the wall. He throws it against the wall and screams. He screams until his heart is satisfied. He screams out his pain as he sees his memories with Kibum play endlessly in his thoughts.
Smiling as if there is nothing wrong
Please come back to me
Taemin runs to the mart across the street, lips pursed into a thin line. He stops when he sees Kibum sulking in a corner. He stops when he sees Kibum’s hand wrapped in a bandage. He stops when he sees Kibum’s hand holding a plastic bag.
Kibum walks towards him, a small smile painted on his face. Taemin meets him halfway. Kibum hands over the plastic bag to Taemin.
“Hyung, your hand-“
“Don’t mind it, Taemin.” Kibum laughs half-heartedly. “It was an ‘in the spur of the moment’ kind of thing.”
“Hyung-“
“Those are all of Jonghyun’s favorite food.” Kibum smiles as tears cloud his eyes again. “And his meds are there too. Make sure he drinks them, okay? And-“
“Why are you doing this, hyung?” Taemin purses his lips again.
“Taemin, you are my best friend. You are Jonghyun’s best friend too. I trust you, Taemin. Please take care of him while he tries to get back up on his own two feet. Promise me, Taemin.” Kibum stares deep into the maknae’s eyes, waiting for him to reply.
“I promise hyung.”
Kibum smiles and a tear rolls down his cheek. “And this-“ Kibum pulls out a black jacket from his bag. “This is his favorite jacket.”
“Hyung!” Taemin shouts. He shouts because he knows the story behind the jacket. He shouts because he knows what that jacket means. He shouts because he didn’t believe it was all over-not until Kibum placed the jacket on his shoulder.
“I know that you know what the jacket means, Taeminnie.” Kibum tries to fight back his tears but ultimately fails. “Take care of it, okay? Get it back to Jjong safely, okay? He loves this jacket a lot. Give it to him and tell him-tell him-“
Taemin watches as Kibum bows his head. “Tell him thank you.” He continues as his voice cracks.
I still regret a lot. I wanna I wanna turn back time
As Kibum runs away, Taemin finds himself sitting on a bench in the park. He bends his head low and weeps. He weeps for his best friends. He weeps for himself. He weeps because of the pain of seeing people close to him breaking down. He weeps because he can’t stand seeing people he loves break down in front of him.
After much thought, Taemin jumps up and walks back home. He jumps up and wipes his tears. He smiles and clears his head. He smiles and prepares to be the best friend he is expected to be. He tries to be cheerful because he can’t be sad. He can’t be sad and cry. He can’t, especially when his best friends are vulnerable and broken. He has to stay strong for his best friends. Because if he who is watching from the side already feels this bad, he can’t imagine how painful it is for the people who are going through this first-hand.
A/N: Ummaaaaaaaaaa! This is for you. <3 Ehehe. XD