It's simply been too long...
Wow...what life has become...
I can honestly say, for one of the first times in a LONG time...
...that I am truly happy.
I can't begin to explain the person I've become, only that I love it. This summer was interesting. I went through a lot. I changed a lot, too. Some for better, some for worse. In the end, I learned a lot from it all.
First, my friends are amazing. They have helped me grow into the woman I have become. This summer, we ALL went through sooo much. Everyone changed. It was interesting to go through together. We all had problems, we all had successes. Through it, we were always there for one another, even when things were heading for the worst. We had our falling outs, and our make ups, and through it all, we learned how much we truly need one another, and what true love really is. Not true love of the romantic type, but true love of your friends. They are my family. And as a family, we cannot survive without any one of us. No matter what. Even when we have falling outs, we are quick to make up, and put it behind us, because we know our life would not be the same without them, and we KNOW that no matter what happened...we still love each other with all of our hearts.
This summer...where can I begin? I drank away the summer. Woah baby, did I. It kinda felt like freshman year of college ALLLLL over again. I drank like a fish. I drank myself into oblivion more times than I can count this summer. Not because I could, but because I had gotten into the freshman mindset that it was absolutely impossible to have fun if I wasn't getting shit-faced.
It took me entirely too long to realize how bad I had gotten. My depression really got the best of me this summer. If I was depressed, I drank until I felt better. And if I DIDN'T feel better, I drank MORE, until I COULDN'T feel the pain anymore. It took one to many rediculous crying episodes/breakdowns for me to realize what a jackass I made out of myself this summer. I was a raging bitch. I can't believe I still have the amazing friends that I do, who picked up my pieces almost every day (and still do). I'm not sure where I would be without them.
Since I've been back at school:
I've quit drinking, and I've realized that I DON'T have to drink to have fun. I know, amazing concept, right? My life is still amazing without being obliterated as often as possible, and I am having great fun, still.
I've realized that it feels great to lose weight, and start looking better...I've also realized that the best way to accomplish that feat is not to stop eating. Your body doesn't appreciate it very much, and tends to kick your ass as often, and as hard as possible. I'm working to fix that.
I've also realized that it's completely fine to be depressed...that many people feel this way, and there's nothing wrong with admitting that you need help...that you can't do it by yourself. Do I enjoy having to be on medication for it? No. Am I ashamed of it in any way, however? Not at all. I will be the first to admit that I needed something bigger than myself to make myself better.
And since I have gotten help...life could not be going any better right now.
*I have the most amazing friends
*I have the most amazing sisters
*I have the most amazing boyfriend
*I have the most amazing family
I could not ask for more right now. I enjoy feeling this happy. It's simply been too long.
Thank you to those who have been there for me every step of the way. I'm not sure what I would do without you. I'm also sorry to those I hurt.
Delta Love,
Jules :)
I can honestly say, for one of the first times in a LONG time...
...that I am truly happy.
I can't begin to explain the person I've become, only that I love it. This summer was interesting. I went through a lot. I changed a lot, too. Some for better, some for worse. In the end, I learned a lot from it all.
First, my friends are amazing. They have helped me grow into the woman I have become. This summer, we ALL went through sooo much. Everyone changed. It was interesting to go through together. We all had problems, we all had successes. Through it, we were always there for one another, even when things were heading for the worst. We had our falling outs, and our make ups, and through it all, we learned how much we truly need one another, and what true love really is. Not true love of the romantic type, but true love of your friends. They are my family. And as a family, we cannot survive without any one of us. No matter what. Even when we have falling outs, we are quick to make up, and put it behind us, because we know our life would not be the same without them, and we KNOW that no matter what happened...we still love each other with all of our hearts.
This summer...where can I begin? I drank away the summer. Woah baby, did I. It kinda felt like freshman year of college ALLLLL over again. I drank like a fish. I drank myself into oblivion more times than I can count this summer. Not because I could, but because I had gotten into the freshman mindset that it was absolutely impossible to have fun if I wasn't getting shit-faced.
It took me entirely too long to realize how bad I had gotten. My depression really got the best of me this summer. If I was depressed, I drank until I felt better. And if I DIDN'T feel better, I drank MORE, until I COULDN'T feel the pain anymore. It took one to many rediculous crying episodes/breakdowns for me to realize what a jackass I made out of myself this summer. I was a raging bitch. I can't believe I still have the amazing friends that I do, who picked up my pieces almost every day (and still do). I'm not sure where I would be without them.
Since I've been back at school:
I've quit drinking, and I've realized that I DON'T have to drink to have fun. I know, amazing concept, right? My life is still amazing without being obliterated as often as possible, and I am having great fun, still.
I've realized that it feels great to lose weight, and start looking better...I've also realized that the best way to accomplish that feat is not to stop eating. Your body doesn't appreciate it very much, and tends to kick your ass as often, and as hard as possible. I'm working to fix that.
I've also realized that it's completely fine to be depressed...that many people feel this way, and there's nothing wrong with admitting that you need help...that you can't do it by yourself. Do I enjoy having to be on medication for it? No. Am I ashamed of it in any way, however? Not at all. I will be the first to admit that I needed something bigger than myself to make myself better.
And since I have gotten help...life could not be going any better right now.
*I have the most amazing friends
*I have the most amazing sisters
*I have the most amazing boyfriend
*I have the most amazing family
I could not ask for more right now. I enjoy feeling this happy. It's simply been too long.
Thank you to those who have been there for me every step of the way. I'm not sure what I would do without you. I'm also sorry to those I hurt.
Delta Love,
Jules :)