(no subject)

[kourtkourt01]

it all came to an end faster than i ever thought it would.. i never thought it would turn out like this i never wanted it to turn out like this but it did and theres no turning back now nothing that can be said or done to change this outcome.... its over with nothing left to be done about it... u meant the world to me but apparently that doesnt matter any more nothingi say or do is ever going to convince you that this isn't how i wanted it to be! but seriously how are you going to sit there and tell me i act like i don't care when thats how you were acting for 2 months?? ive been dealing with this all for 2months youve been dealing with it for a week!!! i know it bothered you before but not like its bothering you now im sorry i couldnt sit there and let my self be depressed about it for ever i had to force myself out of it i still do im just not calling you every 5 minutes or tring to be up your ass any more.. i had to make my self not call you i had to have people take my phone from me i couldnt sit at home alone i wasnt able to sleep i couldnt concentrat in school while you sat there and thought i was a bitch and now im slowly starting to be able to sleep at night, go to my house by my self, and everything else and then you decide to really start careing and thats just because uve been sitting at your house by your self but when your in texas youll be doing other things and it wont bother you like it does now.. but when maybe youll relize someday that just because now that your starting to really be affected by all of this and im not actinglike i was doesnt mean that this isnt killing me... just know anytime someone asks me what made me turn my life around and start to do good in school and stop drinking and doing drugs you'll be the story i tell people on how you changed everything for me and you were my first love... and i will always love you....
hope everything works out for you in texas....

kourtney