Change
I am 22 years old. I have been 22 for the past 9 days. Relatively young, you'd say. But ye gods, I feel old sometimes. The world keeps changing around me, in infinitesimally small ways, such that some changes pass me by and I only discover them months after they had already wrought unmeasurable impact on my life. I change as well. I change every day, so slightly, so minuscule is the change that sometimes I look in the mirror and I'm surprised to see a different person looking back at me.
It's not bad, I'll grant you that. But it's disconcerting. To think that just a year ago - just a month ago! - I was so different to who I am now... amazing. I take a look at the small portion of life available for me to observe and I am awestruck. Will it always be like this? Has it always been like this? Perhaps. But I have learned I can no more observe life objectively than I can pretend to be someone else. I am interwoven with this world, as are all of us. Strangely, although it takes my breath away, this does not make me feel small. Instead, it grants me power. I am but a drop of water in a maelstrom of life, breathless with excitement, and I can, as the popular colloquialism goes, grab it by the testicles. I may not change the World, but I can change my world.
And how amazing is that?
It's terrifying. And I am out of breath.
It's not bad, I'll grant you that. But it's disconcerting. To think that just a year ago - just a month ago! - I was so different to who I am now... amazing. I take a look at the small portion of life available for me to observe and I am awestruck. Will it always be like this? Has it always been like this? Perhaps. But I have learned I can no more observe life objectively than I can pretend to be someone else. I am interwoven with this world, as are all of us. Strangely, although it takes my breath away, this does not make me feel small. Instead, it grants me power. I am but a drop of water in a maelstrom of life, breathless with excitement, and I can, as the popular colloquialism goes, grab it by the testicles. I may not change the World, but I can change my world.
And how amazing is that?
It's terrifying. And I am out of breath.