this is my life
slave all day, over work and and overexert myself to support others inabilities and poor performances.
come home and feel unsatisfied. hours pass and before realizing its midnight. fall asleep uncomfortably. nightmares ensue, always vivid always devastating.
wake up, unrested and dissatisfied. head to work with a state of mind that is hard to explain. feel as though i know i must scale a perilous mountain with a steep incline, only to reach the top and attain no goal.
work begins.
filled with apathy and a sense of longing i can't fulfill.
simple joys and pleasures are elusive and fleeting, momentary reprieves from the repetitive routine that so plagues me.
days go by, and still i think..
what once was had seems so far and distant. now when its..somewhat returned, the feeling has changed. smooth and calming has become course and frustrating. gentle as a breeze on my racing heart has become sheets of ice that assail me. endurance is a surprising quality. though you tell yourself you can take no more, that once more shall be the last time, you become betrayed by yourself. your heart disallows such stoicism, negates an iron will, determination set in stone begins to crumble and erode.
misery is my company. loneliness my friend, apathy my shadow.
current occupier of my time : Kanon
come home and feel unsatisfied. hours pass and before realizing its midnight. fall asleep uncomfortably. nightmares ensue, always vivid always devastating.
wake up, unrested and dissatisfied. head to work with a state of mind that is hard to explain. feel as though i know i must scale a perilous mountain with a steep incline, only to reach the top and attain no goal.
work begins.
filled with apathy and a sense of longing i can't fulfill.
simple joys and pleasures are elusive and fleeting, momentary reprieves from the repetitive routine that so plagues me.
days go by, and still i think..
what once was had seems so far and distant. now when its..somewhat returned, the feeling has changed. smooth and calming has become course and frustrating. gentle as a breeze on my racing heart has become sheets of ice that assail me. endurance is a surprising quality. though you tell yourself you can take no more, that once more shall be the last time, you become betrayed by yourself. your heart disallows such stoicism, negates an iron will, determination set in stone begins to crumble and erode.
misery is my company. loneliness my friend, apathy my shadow.
current occupier of my time : Kanon