(no subject)
Please don't ever tell me that I'm lucky to have the mother that I have. It conjures up really bad images of my childhood. I recall pain and overwhelming loneliness, never sharing meals but instead sitting and eating alone every time, her hitting me arbitrarily just because she was annoyed, letting all those strange men stay in my room, even after one of them molested me and I asked her not to have them stay there anymore, she just told me that I did not have the right to ask her that.
Anyway, I gotta stop playing up the relationship I have with my mother because then people are tempted to tell me how lucky I am and they don't even know the reality. I hate hearing them say "oh, you're so lucky to have your mom" and give me that look with the Mona Lisa smile. Fuck I am still so not over what she did. I really feel very bitter about it. I hate when I'm reminded of it.
New plan, no more speaking nicely about mother or playing up our relationship.
Thank you Bro for listening to me.
Anyway, I gotta stop playing up the relationship I have with my mother because then people are tempted to tell me how lucky I am and they don't even know the reality. I hate hearing them say "oh, you're so lucky to have your mom" and give me that look with the Mona Lisa smile. Fuck I am still so not over what she did. I really feel very bitter about it. I hate when I'm reminded of it.
New plan, no more speaking nicely about mother or playing up our relationship.
Thank you Bro for listening to me.