so confused. help me.
Oh
my
GOD
I am so so so so confused. Like, I can't even say. I have been struggling with this Waring vs MHS decision for MONTHS. It's terrible. Really terrible.
Waring=tiny little school in Beverly. Fairly progressive. Call teachers by their first names. Reeeally trusting/open/free spirited. My type of place, right? But then again...it is SO small. I still can't decide if I do better in smaller environments or bigger ones with more people to choose from...
The high school is...well, the high school. I have tons of friends there. Most of which I know I will lose touch with if I'm not there next year.
But that's not the point. I would get home from Waring at like 6. Waring=your life. I would get home so much earlier from the high school...aka I could do things. Like have a life. And a job. And voice lessons. And stuff.
I have no idea what I'm doing at this point.
Like, I was completely sure I was going to go to Waring up until, like, three days ago. The thing is, I know it will be nice. It's a lovely place. But am I just trying to "escape real life" and recreate my life at Charter? (my tiny little middle school that is still twice the size of Waring..) Christ.
Like, when I was typing that description of Waring it sounded so nice. Like, I know I would be fine there. And I would meet certain people. And I would be forced to really *think*..something I did at Charter and definitely not at MHS. I think I will lose part of myself saying at MHS, I really do..
I've been thinking so much lately about how nothing in life HAS to happen. I mean, people are so sure they have a specific path and that they can't stray from it. We all know the norm. Go to school-->go to college-->get a job. But..you don't have to.
Some people say I won't learn as much at Waring and that because there aren't grades it will be..soft. But...who really is to say what "smart" is, or what "learning" is?
There are a lot of people in my life who want me to go to Waring and a lot who want me to go to the High school.
Honestly...my dream career is anything to do with the performing arts. Somehow I feel like I can develop that better at MHS. I have time for voice lessons, there are *actual* shows to audition for, it's more like the "real world". But then again, what is the "real world"? It can kind of be anything you want it to be..depending on the people you surround yourself with and the choices you make and the situations you put yourself in.
It's expensive. Private schools are expensive. I've never been to one. I would be kidding myself if I said we could afford it. Cause we can't. But there's financial help, and loans and stuff. But then what about college? I need money for that too.
And I probably will get into a better college by going to public school...but then again, who knows?
I so wish I could be in two places at once. I want to try both. I am so scared. I don't know what to do.
I'm leaning towards the high school at the moment, to be perfectly honest. But I keep going back and forth.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm worried about the kids at Waring. There's not many. I'm afraid they'll be..I dunno, sheltered, or "Waring-ified". Whatever that means. Holly says I'll fit in fine, which I'm sure I will...but ahhhhhhhh.
The campus is GORGEOUS, it really is. It feels like a family. But it's change, and I'd be lying to say I don't fear change. MHS kind of seems like the safer choice at this point..
I would give stuff up either way. At Waring I wouldn't have those "typical high school experiences"..like prom or a regular graduation. But it really is a cool place..
Yeah, I'm sure people won't read this whole thing. It's kind of me putting all my stuff our there. Well, this isn't all of it..I can't even put most of it into words.
Grarg. I can picture myself there, that's the thing. Walking around and being all chill. I can see myself back at MHS too.
Hmm. What to do, what to do...
I'm so confused.
Please please please comment. Anything at all. Any thoughts would be helpful.
Help.
my
GOD
I am so so so so confused. Like, I can't even say. I have been struggling with this Waring vs MHS decision for MONTHS. It's terrible. Really terrible.
Waring=tiny little school in Beverly. Fairly progressive. Call teachers by their first names. Reeeally trusting/open/free spirited. My type of place, right? But then again...it is SO small. I still can't decide if I do better in smaller environments or bigger ones with more people to choose from...
The high school is...well, the high school. I have tons of friends there. Most of which I know I will lose touch with if I'm not there next year.
But that's not the point. I would get home from Waring at like 6. Waring=your life. I would get home so much earlier from the high school...aka I could do things. Like have a life. And a job. And voice lessons. And stuff.
I have no idea what I'm doing at this point.
Like, I was completely sure I was going to go to Waring up until, like, three days ago. The thing is, I know it will be nice. It's a lovely place. But am I just trying to "escape real life" and recreate my life at Charter? (my tiny little middle school that is still twice the size of Waring..) Christ.
Like, when I was typing that description of Waring it sounded so nice. Like, I know I would be fine there. And I would meet certain people. And I would be forced to really *think*..something I did at Charter and definitely not at MHS. I think I will lose part of myself saying at MHS, I really do..
I've been thinking so much lately about how nothing in life HAS to happen. I mean, people are so sure they have a specific path and that they can't stray from it. We all know the norm. Go to school-->go to college-->get a job. But..you don't have to.
Some people say I won't learn as much at Waring and that because there aren't grades it will be..soft. But...who really is to say what "smart" is, or what "learning" is?
There are a lot of people in my life who want me to go to Waring and a lot who want me to go to the High school.
Honestly...my dream career is anything to do with the performing arts. Somehow I feel like I can develop that better at MHS. I have time for voice lessons, there are *actual* shows to audition for, it's more like the "real world". But then again, what is the "real world"? It can kind of be anything you want it to be..depending on the people you surround yourself with and the choices you make and the situations you put yourself in.
It's expensive. Private schools are expensive. I've never been to one. I would be kidding myself if I said we could afford it. Cause we can't. But there's financial help, and loans and stuff. But then what about college? I need money for that too.
And I probably will get into a better college by going to public school...but then again, who knows?
I so wish I could be in two places at once. I want to try both. I am so scared. I don't know what to do.
I'm leaning towards the high school at the moment, to be perfectly honest. But I keep going back and forth.
I'm not gonna lie, I'm worried about the kids at Waring. There's not many. I'm afraid they'll be..I dunno, sheltered, or "Waring-ified". Whatever that means. Holly says I'll fit in fine, which I'm sure I will...but ahhhhhhhh.
The campus is GORGEOUS, it really is. It feels like a family. But it's change, and I'd be lying to say I don't fear change. MHS kind of seems like the safer choice at this point..
I would give stuff up either way. At Waring I wouldn't have those "typical high school experiences"..like prom or a regular graduation. But it really is a cool place..
Yeah, I'm sure people won't read this whole thing. It's kind of me putting all my stuff our there. Well, this isn't all of it..I can't even put most of it into words.
Grarg. I can picture myself there, that's the thing. Walking around and being all chill. I can see myself back at MHS too.
Hmm. What to do, what to do...
I'm so confused.
Please please please comment. Anything at all. Any thoughts would be helpful.
Help.