im sooo sad................
I've been depressed lately and i dont know why! well i kinda know why........................now dont make fun of me when i say this but............I have had this feeling...like i have a hole in my heart or a piece missing and that piece is me wanting a father! I know i have a step dad but he treats me like crap and my real dad...well........he gets stoned too much to even pick up the phone to call me! I miss him soo much but everytime i go to see him he always finds a way to piss me off! like everytime i got to see him he just drops me off at my grandma's house and comes back to pick me up around 2 in the morning...to make it worse he is drunk and stonded when he picks me up and thats not very safe! Now my step dad...................he doesnt like me and i dont like him! plain and simple! i stay out of his way and he sometimes stays out of mine! i dunno.........i just want a dad that will be there.....a dad that will take me places like camping, to the lake, fishing, hunting, bike riding, playing sports......you know that kind of dad! im not saying a perfect dad but a dad that just likes to spend time with me and not cuz my mom forced them to! you know what i mean? ohhh well....dreams cant always come true............i'll just have to learn to deal with that!