Gossip
Being a man of unquestionable conduct in certain aspects, it is often amusing if not farcial to be the subject of slander. As Tarkington aptly suggested: rumours are never assumed true until they are hotly denied. Keeping one's silence akins to swollowing up hearty portions of a private joke -- difficult to maintain a serious composure or conceal true merriment. It is interesting to note that during all those times when I have committed grave offenses or downright sins, none boosted my infamy. Yet when one upholds oneself to strict morality and courtesy, the accusations never cease. Perhaps criminal conduct is a duty in these paradoxical times. Afterall, left at room temperature over a fortnight, even goodness spoils. Had we been abreasted of the gleaming notoriety of villany, many would have wisely chosen occupations in more profitable trades.