(no subject)
Quick update to the suckiness of my life.
1. I'm eating again, even if it's hard to keep it in. But I'm coping. I think it's a psychological thing, because I don't actually feel sick
2. I'm pretty sure I'm manic-depressive, or whatever they call it these days. Bipolar disorder seems to be the most used. I think it's better now that I know. Now I understand why I'm feeling like I'm on the top of the world one minute and then want to kill myself the other. They say that these rapid ultradian cycling periods are the hardest. I don't know, but I think I'd rather be happy or depressed, not going back and forth between them several times a week (or day!)
3. I can't get myself diagnosed here, though, because I'm still kind of floating around with no home country at the moment. And I'm too tired to start nagging at my boss about it.
4. Because I can't get diagnosed I can't get any kind of medication either. So I'll just have to live with it. No biggie, I've been doing it for quite a while already. And if it all gets too much then hurting myself always helps. It keeps my mind off the shit.
Now don't worry people, I'm not doing anything crazy like cutting myself up or anything. I just bang myself up a little, the kinda stuff that only bruises :)
5. Today is a low day. But I know that it'll get better in a few days or so.
6. Randomness: CelebMatch says that I'm 100% intellectual match with Nick Jonas!!! We could totally be BFF and have ridiculously deep and meaningful conversations. Joe and Kevin might shoot us both, though...
AND check this out!!! I'm 100% physical match with Kevin (also 90% emotional, 93% intellectual and 94% total) I think we need to hook up. Like, right now.
Unfortunately I seem to be a little less compatible with Joe *sobs* (78% physical, 79% intellectual, only 54% emotional)...well, we can still have casual sex, right?
1. I'm eating again, even if it's hard to keep it in. But I'm coping. I think it's a psychological thing, because I don't actually feel sick
2. I'm pretty sure I'm manic-depressive, or whatever they call it these days. Bipolar disorder seems to be the most used. I think it's better now that I know. Now I understand why I'm feeling like I'm on the top of the world one minute and then want to kill myself the other. They say that these rapid ultradian cycling periods are the hardest. I don't know, but I think I'd rather be happy or depressed, not going back and forth between them several times a week (or day!)
3. I can't get myself diagnosed here, though, because I'm still kind of floating around with no home country at the moment. And I'm too tired to start nagging at my boss about it.
4. Because I can't get diagnosed I can't get any kind of medication either. So I'll just have to live with it. No biggie, I've been doing it for quite a while already. And if it all gets too much then hurting myself always helps. It keeps my mind off the shit.
Now don't worry people, I'm not doing anything crazy like cutting myself up or anything. I just bang myself up a little, the kinda stuff that only bruises :)
5. Today is a low day. But I know that it'll get better in a few days or so.
6. Randomness: CelebMatch says that I'm 100% intellectual match with Nick Jonas!!! We could totally be BFF and have ridiculously deep and meaningful conversations. Joe and Kevin might shoot us both, though...
AND check this out!!! I'm 100% physical match with Kevin (also 90% emotional, 93% intellectual and 94% total) I think we need to hook up. Like, right now.
Unfortunately I seem to be a little less compatible with Joe *sobs* (78% physical, 79% intellectual, only 54% emotional)...well, we can still have casual sex, right?