cut my heart in half &disgard the evidence.
"i'm so scared of you...you're so stong...i'm so scared of you..you're beautiful...i'm so scared of you"
how can i take that? what's the right way... i didn't ever try to intentionally hurt you... &i did. before i even let myself get close, in anyway possible. i have to do some damage.
protect me from what i want
i didn't even get anything out of it. PAIN. that dosen't count. anything that i wanted. i made you scared of me.
i'm not strong, i'm not brave. i'm weak, shy, scared &lonely. you don't know how much i'm scared of you. i can't even look in your direction. how am i going to act after that?
i don't think the chemicals are working. i need something stronger. i want to feel numb. anything to keep me feeling like this. anything to get my stomach out of these knots. anything to make me strong. something to make me stable. something to make me calm. anything that can keep me sane.
my heart stops &flips upside down as if someone has just ripped it out, &then shoved it back in my chest. &then it beats quick &hard. &then it happens all over again. please take me off repeat.
my only cure: you. your smile. your touch. your hand holding mine. your voice late at night. your lips pressed against mine. nothing else matters to me right now.
i need to get close, i need trust. trust in you, &for you to trust in me. i need to know you are by my side. i just need to feel you there.
"everytime something good gets close to him, he pushes it away."
how can i take that? what's the right way... i didn't ever try to intentionally hurt you... &i did. before i even let myself get close, in anyway possible. i have to do some damage.
protect me from what i want
i didn't even get anything out of it. PAIN. that dosen't count. anything that i wanted. i made you scared of me.
i'm not strong, i'm not brave. i'm weak, shy, scared &lonely. you don't know how much i'm scared of you. i can't even look in your direction. how am i going to act after that?
i don't think the chemicals are working. i need something stronger. i want to feel numb. anything to keep me feeling like this. anything to get my stomach out of these knots. anything to make me strong. something to make me stable. something to make me calm. anything that can keep me sane.
my heart stops &flips upside down as if someone has just ripped it out, &then shoved it back in my chest. &then it beats quick &hard. &then it happens all over again. please take me off repeat.
my only cure: you. your smile. your touch. your hand holding mine. your voice late at night. your lips pressed against mine. nothing else matters to me right now.
i need to get close, i need trust. trust in you, &for you to trust in me. i need to know you are by my side. i just need to feel you there.
"everytime something good gets close to him, he pushes it away."