kill yourself to never ever stop, cato/clove, pg-13, part 3/3
The dreams all blur together, endless blood and silver flashing knives and grins with teeth. At one point, in one dream, one night, he is fucking her.
She is naked and impossibly warm beneath him, burning to the touch - her mouth sears and where her fingers dig into his skin they cut through like her knives.
He groans, and he wants-he wants never wake up, only this, slowly tearing each other apart because it’s the only thing either of them know how to do, the only thing they could ever be. They won’t make it out of this arena. He will kill her. He doesn’t think these dreams will go away when he does.
She rolls on top of him, and he lets her, lets her push him into the ground and grin. And then she is slitting his throat, this is the same dream, over and over again, his blood on them both and he is reaching for her throat but she evades him, she is going to make it out, not him, and he wonders what kind of dreams will haunt her nights.
He never considers the possibility that neither of them will win.
And then:
“Cato!”
-it is a shriek and it is his name and he was supposed to be the one to kill her, he promised her, and she screams his name and he isn’t there.
When she flashes across the sky, he thinks they could have chosen a better picture, because she is solemn in this one, no sign of teeth, and the world should remember her with sharp teeth and quick knives, not this plain girl in the sky. She looks young there, like she could have been a child, and that is wrong too. He turns his head away before the image disappears.
Liar, it accuses him. You promised.
He sways at the edge and wonders if she felt this in her last seconds, when she screamed out for him, “Cato!”, if she knew then: they have always been dead, dead since they were born, and for the first time in his life he feels desperately young and afraid.
And the beasts close over him when he hits the ground and he thinks of Clove lifeless in the grass and lifeless in the sky, knives couldn’t save her, nothing could save them, but he remembers wolf grins and a flash of silv-
oh my god. oh my god oh my god oh my god. i don't know what took me so long but this is all sorts of fantastic. it totally plays into this idea in my head that Cato is secretly deeply head over heels in love with Clove and Clove is just such a badass and tiny and vicious and awesome.
You are wonderful. Would you like me to quote some lines back to you? because I'm doing it anyways.
He thinks she might be grinning. It sounds like it.
“I promise I’ll kill you,” she says quietly, a second later, because clearly the girl doesn’t know how to drop anything.
Or today could be the day I kill you, he thinks, but there is a stronger voice in his head, roaring, not yet, not yet, and he concedes to it.
they have always been dead, dead since they were born, and for the first time in his life he feels desperately young and afraid.
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. I'm friending you immediately. I'd love the add back!
oh god no, that wasn't long at all - i'm sorry i took so long to get back to you because ahhhhhh, thank you!! I am so glad that you liked, I've never written anything for THG before so this was a bit of an experiment as it turns out. but eeee, wow, thank you so much, happy you liked those parts especially ;) and thanks for the friend, I will certainly add you back now, sorry about taking so long!
there are so so many cato/clove stories around here but this is the bestbestbestbest !! i'd litter this with hearts if i cound, god, i'd even kiss this if i could.
to leave cato's last thoughts unfinished is like the most perrrrfect thing you could have done. godgodgod, you really killed me with this - sooo amaziiing !!
wow, wow, I honestly don't even know what to say to that, holy smokes, you are much too flattering but thank you so much! and I'm sososo glad you liked the ending, phew! just, yeah, wow, thank you :3
I love this. The whole thing, but this part especially really got me:
When she flashes across the sky, he thinks they could have chosen a better picture, because she is solemn in this one, no sign of teeth, and the world should remember her with sharp teeth and quick knives, not this plain girl in the sky. She looks young there, like she could have been a child, and that is wrong too. He turns his head away before the image disappears.
Sorry for such a delayed response but ahhh, thank you! So glad to hear that you enjoyed - and that you liked that part especially! I kinda did too, aha, so that is very great :3 Thank you!
The dreams all blur together, endless blood and silver flashing knives and grins with teeth. At one point, in one dream, one night, he is fucking her.
She is naked and impossibly warm beneath him, burning to the touch - her mouth sears and where her fingers dig into his skin they cut through like her knives.
He groans, and he wants-he wants never wake up, only this, slowly tearing each other apart because it’s the only thing either of them know how to do, the only thing they could ever be. They won’t make it out of this arena. He will kill her. He doesn’t think these dreams will go away when he does.
She rolls on top of him, and he lets her, lets her push him into the ground and grin. And then she is slitting his throat, this is the same dream, over and over again, his blood on them both and he is reaching for her throat but she evades him, she is going to make it out, not him, and he wonders what kind of dreams will haunt her nights.
He never considers the possibility that neither of them will win.
And then:
“Cato!”
-it is a shriek and it is his name and he was supposed to be the one to kill her, he promised her, and she screams his name and he isn’t there.
When she flashes across the sky, he thinks they could have chosen a better picture, because she is solemn in this one, no sign of teeth, and the world should remember her with sharp teeth and quick knives, not this plain girl in the sky. She looks young there, like she could have been a child, and that is wrong too. He turns his head away before the image disappears.
Liar, it accuses him. You promised.
He sways at the edge and wonders if she felt this in her last seconds, when she screamed out for him, “Cato!”, if she knew then: they have always been dead, dead since they were born, and for the first time in his life he feels desperately young and afraid.
And the beasts close over him when he hits the ground and he thinks of Clove lifeless in the grass and lifeless in the sky, knives couldn’t save her, nothing could save them, but he remembers wolf grins and a flash of silv-
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You are wonderful. Would you like me to quote some lines back to you? because I'm doing it anyways.
He thinks she might be grinning. It sounds like it.
“I promise I’ll kill you,” she says quietly, a second later, because clearly the girl doesn’t know how to drop anything.
Or today could be the day I kill you, he thinks, but there is a stronger voice in his head, roaring, not yet, not yet, and he concedes to it.
they have always been dead, dead since they were born, and for the first time in his life he feels desperately young and afraid.
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. I'm friending you immediately. I'd love the add back!
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i'd litter this with hearts if i cound, god, i'd even kiss this if i could.
to leave cato's last thoughts unfinished is like the most perrrrfect thing you could have done. godgodgod, you really killed me with this - sooo amaziiing !!
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When she flashes across the sky, he thinks they could have chosen a better picture, because she is solemn in this one, no sign of teeth, and the world should remember her with sharp teeth and quick knives, not this plain girl in the sky. She looks young there, like she could have been a child, and that is wrong too. He turns his head away before the image disappears.
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