I fucked a guy with a girlfriend and a baby.
waste so much of my time,
I’ve got nothing to do.
I waste so much of my God damn time,
Starring at my silent phone.
I wait for that light.
For that vibrate.
For that semi colon,
And parenthesis.
All night.
Then I imagine that crooked smile.
At first I thought I wanted to waste it.
But it’s different now,
Moving faster,
Time is slowing,
Can barely even notice,
but I know this.
The busier, the less I need.
I try to consume myself with distraction.
But my attention, still struggles for reaction.
My crippling attraction.
Asthenia.
I think about bright eyes,
And wonder if they shine when I pop up,
Being intrusive on the basic every day thoughts.
Memories.
Are they getting tired from being up turned like the corners of lips?
My eyes are dull and pouting.
Solitude. Stationary.
My time goes faster.
I waste so much of it.
An addiction.
Sitting here missing,
Wishing I was kissing,
That captive personality.
A dick, that sweet talks,
Only ever wants some action.
How often do I show up,
In daily thought.
In weekly want.
Let’s not compare answers.
They are substandard,
Unsatisfactory.
For every step I take away,
I hear the tick-tock growing.
No vacancy in my heart.
So much time I am wasting.
Thinking of,
you.