Smut
I've just been reading a study into pornography. This is for academic purposes. No, really. I'm currently writing about Showgirls. No, *really*. Writing such an essay is exactly like raising my hand and confessing that, yes, somehow I really love this trashy movie. Because I do.
On the flip side, I feel that this has affected my mind for the last few days. I got back into into writing my story (let's-not-be-presumptive-by-calling-it-a-novel-just-yet) again. Two years ago, this started off as what I thought would be a children's story.
Yesterday I wrote a scene that would definately *not* belong in a children's story. Hmm. *Not* JK Rowling material at all. Now comes the crucial decision. I either a) Censor and heavily edit this bit. And, er, some other bits. And make it that bit more wholesome again.
Or b) Sod it. Make the whole thing that bit more un kid-like so the filth sits in nicely.
A meme that I totally forgot to post in the last entry:
:x: name = Most call me Bex.
:x: piercing = No, nearly had my nose pierced years ago. Glad I didn't now.
:x: tattoos = No, I can't make my mind up where I want it yet.
:x: height = 5'2. Don't tell the model agency.
:x: shoe size = 5 1/2. The 1/2 being crucial and annoying.
:x: hair color = Dark auburn. I've dyed it so much from an early age though, that I'm still not sure if this is my natutal colour I have right now.
:x: length = Long, for the first time in years
:x: siblings = none. *does Rik from Young Ones impression*
LAST ..
:x: movie you went to see = Harry Potter Chamber of Secrets, I think. Take me to the cinema, someone.
:x: movie you bought = Wind in the Willows. The Terry Jones version, I'm not *completely* daft! Although it's probably wrong to find Robert Bathurst as a weasel so...sexy.
:x: song you listened to = Andy You're A Star by the Killers. That's kinda sexy too.
:x: song that was stuck in your head = Crosstown Traffic, Hendrix. Sexy - adjective of the day obviously.
:x: cd you bought = I think it was the Franz Ferdinand album (seeming as most CDs recently have been gifts and I don't buy singles anymore). Sexy again.
:x: cd you listened to = The Killers album. Se-
:x: person you've called = Can't remember. Rarely call when I can use MSN or text instead.
:x: person that's called you = Some mystery caller. Without a name, without a number.... *Twilight Zone music*
:x: tv show you've watched = the Cold Feet pilot
:x: person you were thinking of = Adam. Shame on you with those texts! :p
DO ..
:x: you have a crush on someone = I *always*have a crush on someone
:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = frequently
:x: you think about suicide = Have done. In your face, optimism!
:x: you believe in online dating = Hmm, could work. But you get cynical when you realise what bizarre people are out there. She said with just a trace of irony.
:x: others find you attractive = Well, they don't bother to tell me when they apparently do...
:x: you want more piercings = No...hang on, *more*? What the...? *checks*
:x: you like cleaning = Not really, but hoovering's a bit like noisy therapy.
:x: you like roller coasters = Absol-bloody-tootley. FAO Alton Towers: make Nemesis longer.
:x: you write in cursive or print = a bit of both - reflects my indecisive nature.
:x: you carry a donor card = No. Should I?
FOR OR AGAINST ..
:x: long distance relationships = Against. Tried it. Failed.
:x: using someone = Well, depends what for, doesn' it?
:x: killing people = Lol, no. Although, again, it depends what for...? :p
:x: teenage smoking = I don't mind people smoking, but it's not wise is it?
:x: premarital sex = Hmm. Bit rare, isn't it, in today's society, for it *not* to happen? I think what's important is that you love each other for real, married or not.
:x: driving drunk = Don't be silly!
:x: gay/lesbian relationship = for. Imagine a world without slash fanfiction!
:x: soap operas = I'd say against...but then I inexplicably started watching Hollyoaks (yeah, I know) and fell in love with both Tony and Bella. So...yeah.
FAVORITE ..
:x: food = Midget Gems. Not sure if that qualifies as food.
:x: song = Creep by Radiohead
:x: thing to do = dance - boogie wonderland!
:x: thing to talk about = anything really. I don't think anything beats having a girly talk about slash and celebrities you fancy though :D
:x: sports = Um, I watched the school football to see Ben in shorts. I'm not the person to ask.
:x: drinks = Everyday - Perfectly Clear (hey, that's the brand not me being picky) apple water. I love white wine. And for occasions, Pimms or Pernod go down a treat.
:x: clothes = What, I have to pick from the whole lot? Hmm, maybe my Jessica Rabbit style red satin dress.
:x: movies = Beetlejuice and Rocky Horror Picture Show.
:x: band/singer = Muse, Depeche Mode, Franz Ferdinand. And we have a new contender in the shape of The Killers.
:x: holiday = Autumn, Halloween, all that.
:x: new nerdy saying = It's not so much a saying, but I'm surprised that no one's hit me yet for saying "Wibble" more times than necessary. At random moments. For no reason. Wibble.
HAVE YOU ..
:x: ever cried over a girl/boy = Of course
:x: ever lied to someone = Yes, nothing outrageous.
:x: ever been in a fist fight = More of a girly Bridget Jonesy Colin Firth/Huh Grant fight really.
:x: ever been arrested = No. Should I be?
NUMBER ..
:x: of times I have been in love? = Too many?
:x: of times I have had my heart broken? = quite a few times too.
:x: of drugs taken illegally? = None. As far as I'm aware.....
:x: of people I consider my enemies? = Ah, that be secret. God forbid my nemeseseses should find this!
:x: of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? = Not sure, a few times. Only in the birthday list though, or school related.
:x: of scars on my body? = Lots of tiny unexplanable scars. In weird places.
:x: of things in my past that I regret? = Maaannnnny
FAVORITE ..
:x: disney movie = The Lion King. Or maybe Bedknobs and Broomsticks. Or even Little Mermaid for sheer girlyness.
:x: scent = bubblegum
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ..
:x: handsome/pretty = Objective, that, really. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that. Beer holder, even.
:x: funny = I have my moments
:x: hot = rather cold, actually :p
:x: friendly = I try
:x: amusing = isn't that the same as funny?
:x: ugly = frequently, I think
:x: loveable = I'd hope so
:x: pessimistic = Yuhah.
:x: optimistic = of course not!
:x: caring = Yes
:x: sweet= hopefully
:x: dorky = Probably
:x: Spell your first name backwards x: acceber. Xeb sounds good though.
:x: The story behind your user name x: Kola Qube was a comic character I used to draw whilst I was at school. Named after cola cubes, which I liked at the time.
:x: Are you straight? x: No, quite...bendy in that area really.
:x: Where do you live? x: Greater Manchester (it's, like, GREATER). Some may argue a different planet.
:x: 4 words that sum you up x: Quirky, sarcastic, intense, silly.
DESCRIBE YOUR -
:x: Wallet x: Emily Strange with cats on. Don't use it much though - not when I can have a disorganised pocket instead.
:x: Toothbrush x: A red Betty Boop electric one
:x: Pillow cover x: bright green
:x: Blanket x: Stripey purple
:x: Coffee cup x: White with little cartoon girls. Not particularly personal.
:x: Sunglasses x: Green, from Afflecks Palace. So they rock.
:x: Shoes x: Can't...pick. Maybe my big platform boots. With an honourable mention to my silver Spice Girl boots for sheer silliness.
:x: Favorite top x: Red and black striped sweater with a sequin poodle. Or maybe my top with the fake tie and blazer front. Or my bright yellow one with the photo pocket. Or...Hmm, love tops.
:x: CD in stereo right now x: Prodigy, Spitfire.
:x: What you are wearing now x: Camo combats, big boots and a little green t-shirt. Bit Croft-ish.
:x: hair x: In a long plait. Again, Croft-ish. Not intentional.
:x: In my mouth x: My teeth and tongue, hopefully.
:x: In my head x: Still Jimi Hendrix
:x: Wishing x: For some snow again
:x: After this x: Screencapping for someone's request. A thrilling answer, eh.
:x: Talking to x: No one in particular. No one who's listening anyhow.
:x: If you could get away with it and murder anyone, who and for what reason? x: Wouldn't that go against my earlier answer?
:x: Person you wish you could see right now x: Any of my best friends from many moons ago. I miss 'em.
:x: Is next to you x: A window. A bloody cold one.
:x: Something that you are deathly afraid of? x: Erk, I'd be jinxing myself if I reveal them surely? A clue: Edgar Allen Poe story. Shivers up the spine.
:x: Do you like candles x: Yeah, why not.
:x: Do you like hot wax x: ...where? Is the vital question here.
:x: Do you like incense x: Yes, I like strawberry incense sticks. No one else in the house seems to.
:x: Do you like the taste of blood x: Actually, mine does taste rather interesting. Got a metallic kick to it.
:x: Do you believe in love x: Yes. #I believe in a thing called love...#
:x: Do you believe in soul mates x: Yes
:x: Do you believe in love at first sight: Yes. Happened enough times.
:x: Do you believe in forgiveness: Yes. I forgive. I just...don't forget.
:x: Do you believe in God: Yes. Gets a bit of blame from me though.
:x: What do you want done with your body when you die: Ooh, that's kinky. Cremation. Unless you *did* mean something kinky.
:x: Who is your worst enemy?: I don't have an enemy hierarchy. Yet.
:x: If you could have any animal for a pet what whould it be :x: A monkeh. :D
:x: Can you eat with chopsticks :x: I've yet to master a fork.
:x: What's your favorite coin?: Pound coins. Not that I'm against the Euro or anyfink.
:x: What are 5 cities you wouldn't mind relocating to?: Hey, I'm not fussy.
:x: What's something you wish you could understand better?: People
:x: Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time?: Er...everyone?
On the flip side, I feel that this has affected my mind for the last few days. I got back into into writing my story (let's-not-be-presumptive-by-calling-it-a-novel-just-yet) again. Two years ago, this started off as what I thought would be a children's story.
Yesterday I wrote a scene that would definately *not* belong in a children's story. Hmm. *Not* JK Rowling material at all. Now comes the crucial decision. I either a) Censor and heavily edit this bit. And, er, some other bits. And make it that bit more wholesome again.
Or b) Sod it. Make the whole thing that bit more un kid-like so the filth sits in nicely.
A meme that I totally forgot to post in the last entry:
:x: name = Most call me Bex.
:x: piercing = No, nearly had my nose pierced years ago. Glad I didn't now.
:x: tattoos = No, I can't make my mind up where I want it yet.
:x: height = 5'2. Don't tell the model agency.
:x: shoe size = 5 1/2. The 1/2 being crucial and annoying.
:x: hair color = Dark auburn. I've dyed it so much from an early age though, that I'm still not sure if this is my natutal colour I have right now.
:x: length = Long, for the first time in years
:x: siblings = none. *does Rik from Young Ones impression*
LAST ..
:x: movie you went to see = Harry Potter Chamber of Secrets, I think. Take me to the cinema, someone.
:x: movie you bought = Wind in the Willows. The Terry Jones version, I'm not *completely* daft! Although it's probably wrong to find Robert Bathurst as a weasel so...sexy.
:x: song you listened to = Andy You're A Star by the Killers. That's kinda sexy too.
:x: song that was stuck in your head = Crosstown Traffic, Hendrix. Sexy - adjective of the day obviously.
:x: cd you bought = I think it was the Franz Ferdinand album (seeming as most CDs recently have been gifts and I don't buy singles anymore). Sexy again.
:x: cd you listened to = The Killers album. Se-
:x: person you've called = Can't remember. Rarely call when I can use MSN or text instead.
:x: person that's called you = Some mystery caller. Without a name, without a number.... *Twilight Zone music*
:x: tv show you've watched = the Cold Feet pilot
:x: person you were thinking of = Adam. Shame on you with those texts! :p
DO ..
:x: you have a crush on someone = I *always*have a crush on someone
:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = frequently
:x: you think about suicide = Have done. In your face, optimism!
:x: you believe in online dating = Hmm, could work. But you get cynical when you realise what bizarre people are out there. She said with just a trace of irony.
:x: others find you attractive = Well, they don't bother to tell me when they apparently do...
:x: you want more piercings = No...hang on, *more*? What the...? *checks*
:x: you like cleaning = Not really, but hoovering's a bit like noisy therapy.
:x: you like roller coasters = Absol-bloody-tootley. FAO Alton Towers: make Nemesis longer.
:x: you write in cursive or print = a bit of both - reflects my indecisive nature.
:x: you carry a donor card = No. Should I?
FOR OR AGAINST ..
:x: long distance relationships = Against. Tried it. Failed.
:x: using someone = Well, depends what for, doesn' it?
:x: killing people = Lol, no. Although, again, it depends what for...? :p
:x: teenage smoking = I don't mind people smoking, but it's not wise is it?
:x: premarital sex = Hmm. Bit rare, isn't it, in today's society, for it *not* to happen? I think what's important is that you love each other for real, married or not.
:x: driving drunk = Don't be silly!
:x: gay/lesbian relationship = for. Imagine a world without slash fanfiction!
:x: soap operas = I'd say against...but then I inexplicably started watching Hollyoaks (yeah, I know) and fell in love with both Tony and Bella. So...yeah.
FAVORITE ..
:x: food = Midget Gems. Not sure if that qualifies as food.
:x: song = Creep by Radiohead
:x: thing to do = dance - boogie wonderland!
:x: thing to talk about = anything really. I don't think anything beats having a girly talk about slash and celebrities you fancy though :D
:x: sports = Um, I watched the school football to see Ben in shorts. I'm not the person to ask.
:x: drinks = Everyday - Perfectly Clear (hey, that's the brand not me being picky) apple water. I love white wine. And for occasions, Pimms or Pernod go down a treat.
:x: clothes = What, I have to pick from the whole lot? Hmm, maybe my Jessica Rabbit style red satin dress.
:x: movies = Beetlejuice and Rocky Horror Picture Show.
:x: band/singer = Muse, Depeche Mode, Franz Ferdinand. And we have a new contender in the shape of The Killers.
:x: holiday = Autumn, Halloween, all that.
:x: new nerdy saying = It's not so much a saying, but I'm surprised that no one's hit me yet for saying "Wibble" more times than necessary. At random moments. For no reason. Wibble.
HAVE YOU ..
:x: ever cried over a girl/boy = Of course
:x: ever lied to someone = Yes, nothing outrageous.
:x: ever been in a fist fight = More of a girly Bridget Jonesy Colin Firth/Huh Grant fight really.
:x: ever been arrested = No. Should I be?
NUMBER ..
:x: of times I have been in love? = Too many?
:x: of times I have had my heart broken? = quite a few times too.
:x: of drugs taken illegally? = None. As far as I'm aware.....
:x: of people I consider my enemies? = Ah, that be secret. God forbid my nemeseseses should find this!
:x: of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? = Not sure, a few times. Only in the birthday list though, or school related.
:x: of scars on my body? = Lots of tiny unexplanable scars. In weird places.
:x: of things in my past that I regret? = Maaannnnny
FAVORITE ..
:x: disney movie = The Lion King. Or maybe Bedknobs and Broomsticks. Or even Little Mermaid for sheer girlyness.
:x: scent = bubblegum
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ..
:x: handsome/pretty = Objective, that, really. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that. Beer holder, even.
:x: funny = I have my moments
:x: hot = rather cold, actually :p
:x: friendly = I try
:x: amusing = isn't that the same as funny?
:x: ugly = frequently, I think
:x: loveable = I'd hope so
:x: pessimistic = Yuhah.
:x: optimistic = of course not!
:x: caring = Yes
:x: sweet= hopefully
:x: dorky = Probably
:x: Spell your first name backwards x: acceber. Xeb sounds good though.
:x: The story behind your user name x: Kola Qube was a comic character I used to draw whilst I was at school. Named after cola cubes, which I liked at the time.
:x: Are you straight? x: No, quite...bendy in that area really.
:x: Where do you live? x: Greater Manchester (it's, like, GREATER). Some may argue a different planet.
:x: 4 words that sum you up x: Quirky, sarcastic, intense, silly.
DESCRIBE YOUR -
:x: Wallet x: Emily Strange with cats on. Don't use it much though - not when I can have a disorganised pocket instead.
:x: Toothbrush x: A red Betty Boop electric one
:x: Pillow cover x: bright green
:x: Blanket x: Stripey purple
:x: Coffee cup x: White with little cartoon girls. Not particularly personal.
:x: Sunglasses x: Green, from Afflecks Palace. So they rock.
:x: Shoes x: Can't...pick. Maybe my big platform boots. With an honourable mention to my silver Spice Girl boots for sheer silliness.
:x: Favorite top x: Red and black striped sweater with a sequin poodle. Or maybe my top with the fake tie and blazer front. Or my bright yellow one with the photo pocket. Or...Hmm, love tops.
:x: CD in stereo right now x: Prodigy, Spitfire.
:x: What you are wearing now x: Camo combats, big boots and a little green t-shirt. Bit Croft-ish.
:x: hair x: In a long plait. Again, Croft-ish. Not intentional.
:x: In my mouth x: My teeth and tongue, hopefully.
:x: In my head x: Still Jimi Hendrix
:x: Wishing x: For some snow again
:x: After this x: Screencapping for someone's request. A thrilling answer, eh.
:x: Talking to x: No one in particular. No one who's listening anyhow.
:x: If you could get away with it and murder anyone, who and for what reason? x: Wouldn't that go against my earlier answer?
:x: Person you wish you could see right now x: Any of my best friends from many moons ago. I miss 'em.
:x: Is next to you x: A window. A bloody cold one.
:x: Something that you are deathly afraid of? x: Erk, I'd be jinxing myself if I reveal them surely? A clue: Edgar Allen Poe story. Shivers up the spine.
:x: Do you like candles x: Yeah, why not.
:x: Do you like hot wax x: ...where? Is the vital question here.
:x: Do you like incense x: Yes, I like strawberry incense sticks. No one else in the house seems to.
:x: Do you like the taste of blood x: Actually, mine does taste rather interesting. Got a metallic kick to it.
:x: Do you believe in love x: Yes. #I believe in a thing called love...#
:x: Do you believe in soul mates x: Yes
:x: Do you believe in love at first sight: Yes. Happened enough times.
:x: Do you believe in forgiveness: Yes. I forgive. I just...don't forget.
:x: Do you believe in God: Yes. Gets a bit of blame from me though.
:x: What do you want done with your body when you die: Ooh, that's kinky. Cremation. Unless you *did* mean something kinky.
:x: Who is your worst enemy?: I don't have an enemy hierarchy. Yet.
:x: If you could have any animal for a pet what whould it be :x: A monkeh. :D
:x: Can you eat with chopsticks :x: I've yet to master a fork.
:x: What's your favorite coin?: Pound coins. Not that I'm against the Euro or anyfink.
:x: What are 5 cities you wouldn't mind relocating to?: Hey, I'm not fussy.
:x: What's something you wish you could understand better?: People
:x: Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time?: Er...everyone?