[двадцать один]

[kol_shevik]

Ah-- is very embarrassing for it to be out on display like this.

Has anyone seen a heart that is not belonging to them? Could perhaps return to Russia now, окей?

[Awkward throat clearing okay here we go.] ...Please do not be getting it dirty. Is difficult to wash.

Comments

[ufosrreal]

A... heart?

[kol_shevik]

Да. Sits in chest. Pumping the blood. Believing in Glory of Motherland.

[ufosrreal]

H-hold on... you don't mean somebody else's I hope!

[kol_shevik]

нет! Russia's heart. No one else's heart will fit.

[ufosrreal]

Oh, uhm well.. that should be inside your chest--on the left side for most people...

[kol_shevik]

Russia has already checked there! Is gone.

[ufosrreal]

M-maybe you just didn't do it right? Try checking your pulse..?

[kol_shevik]

...Have checked hole where heart should be twice now and is still not there.

[ufosrreal]

...

W-wait, there's... literally a hole where your heart should be?

Y-you're kidding right?

[kol_shevik]

нет.

Russia is never kidding.

[ufosrreal]

A-ah!! W-where was the last place you put it then?! O-or at least remember seeing it?!

[kol_shevik]

Mm, last remember seeing it...

In chest where it is belonging.

[ufosrreal]

W-well do you remember how you lost it?

[kol_shevik]

Fell out. Have already said this.

[SO

HELPFUL.]

[ufosrreal]

[She's got patience to compete with a plastic surgeon.]

Okay well.... Do you remember where you were when you last saw it? Your house? On a walk? M-maybe you should start there!

[kol_shevik]

...Maybe someone stole it while Russia was not looking.