Sad and Frustrating thing to see at doctor visit
Yesterday I had a routine prenatal visit, and my doctor had to deliver a baby an couple of hour before, so she was running a bit behind. Therefore, I was in the waiting room long enough to witness a sad scene, and it has really bothered me.
There was a girl of about 19 or 20 who was about 5 months pregnant, who had obviously just had the ultrasound where they can reveal the gender of the baby. Her parents and her boyfriend (he just didn't give off the husband vibe, and I didn't see rings, although that doesn't really mean anything in and of itself) were with her. They came in and sat down right by me, so I couldn't help but overhear them.
She was so excited, just bubbling, because she's going to have a girl. Her parents were apparently carved from wood, they were so stiff and disapproving. Her boyfriend was only technically there - he clearly wished he was anywhere else. When they all sat down, the girl reached over and tried to hold her boyfriend's hand and said, "Aren't you excited, Daddy? A girl!" His reaction was an inaudible mutter, and a definite pulling away. Her bubbly smile faded a bit, but she determinedly turned and said in a cheerful voice to her mother, "Who should I call first? I can't wait to tell everyone!" Her mother pursed her lips and said nothing. The girl then said to her mother, "Don't you tell anyone! I get to break the news!" Her mother's response? "Who would I want to call?" in a cold, distant voice.
Her father then said, "Well, I'm going to get going." He and the mother stood up, walked over to the girl and gave her stiff little hugs, then gave the boyfriend a very cold handshake. The boyfriend got up and announced that he was going outside for a smoke. The girl asked, "But you're coming back, aren't you?" in such an uncertain voice. He muttered something, then stalked out. She sat alone, looking like her joy had been completely wiped out.
I chatted her up for a while (Is this your first? It's a girl? How wonderful! You just wait - you've never loved anyone like you're going to love this baby. It's an amazing thing, etc.) and got her somewhat bubbly again, but I could have cheerfully skinned both of her parents and her boyfriend for being such a useless, thoughtless, selfish bunch of gits.
I was so angry at these people. I don't care what their history is (and obviously there's a lot of history there!), they should have sucked it up and really been there for her for that day. Seeing your first child for the first time on an ultrasound is such an amazing experience, and finding out the gender is such an extraordinary feeling. It makes everything so real, and can be one of the best days you've ever had, if you're with someone who shares the joy. It's so infuriating that all three of them were so wrapped up in their own issues that they spoiled her happiness and excitement.
I hope, for her sake, that she has a supportive group of friends, to make up for lack of family support. She needs somebody!
There was a girl of about 19 or 20 who was about 5 months pregnant, who had obviously just had the ultrasound where they can reveal the gender of the baby. Her parents and her boyfriend (he just didn't give off the husband vibe, and I didn't see rings, although that doesn't really mean anything in and of itself) were with her. They came in and sat down right by me, so I couldn't help but overhear them.
She was so excited, just bubbling, because she's going to have a girl. Her parents were apparently carved from wood, they were so stiff and disapproving. Her boyfriend was only technically there - he clearly wished he was anywhere else. When they all sat down, the girl reached over and tried to hold her boyfriend's hand and said, "Aren't you excited, Daddy? A girl!" His reaction was an inaudible mutter, and a definite pulling away. Her bubbly smile faded a bit, but she determinedly turned and said in a cheerful voice to her mother, "Who should I call first? I can't wait to tell everyone!" Her mother pursed her lips and said nothing. The girl then said to her mother, "Don't you tell anyone! I get to break the news!" Her mother's response? "Who would I want to call?" in a cold, distant voice.
Her father then said, "Well, I'm going to get going." He and the mother stood up, walked over to the girl and gave her stiff little hugs, then gave the boyfriend a very cold handshake. The boyfriend got up and announced that he was going outside for a smoke. The girl asked, "But you're coming back, aren't you?" in such an uncertain voice. He muttered something, then stalked out. She sat alone, looking like her joy had been completely wiped out.
I chatted her up for a while (Is this your first? It's a girl? How wonderful! You just wait - you've never loved anyone like you're going to love this baby. It's an amazing thing, etc.) and got her somewhat bubbly again, but I could have cheerfully skinned both of her parents and her boyfriend for being such a useless, thoughtless, selfish bunch of gits.
I was so angry at these people. I don't care what their history is (and obviously there's a lot of history there!), they should have sucked it up and really been there for her for that day. Seeing your first child for the first time on an ultrasound is such an amazing experience, and finding out the gender is such an extraordinary feeling. It makes everything so real, and can be one of the best days you've ever had, if you're with someone who shares the joy. It's so infuriating that all three of them were so wrapped up in their own issues that they spoiled her happiness and excitement.
I hope, for her sake, that she has a supportive group of friends, to make up for lack of family support. She needs somebody!