rudolph the red nosed reindeer....
Radio stations are playing a lot of Christmas themed songs in between pop songs these days, no exception when I was on my way home today from work, they played "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer"
It's rather weird, when I heard the catchy music and about to sing along, something stuck in my throat, then I couldn't stop my watering eyes, dropped a few before I reach the parking lot. Christmas music never really meant much to me besides they are really just songs, some are old and some are recent and some you probably don't want to hear twice in a day lol.
I have been writing cards to people since last week, and lack quite a lot of sleep for more than a week now. Some friends don't want me to stress myself out but...after seeing people face to face, maybe exchange some life stories online and update FA and LJ, we don't always interact with each other that much in life, especially the ones that are living from different states. So I just wanted to show my appreciation, put a bit more efforts in each card, show them that I care, and hope each person feel special even for a second. That's the least I can do.
But this lacking of sleep and stress from work, we had a few people left in December so my work load and duties increased, really makes me tired, probably feel much less like back in school days just before the finals. When I heard the song rudolph the red nosed reindeer it felt just like a kind, warm hearted person, who's petting right on my head, saying "It's okay". It's just a mental imagination, but for a long time especially during this winter, that's my first time felt "Being cared of".
It's not like hearing a friend saying "I will cover you", but more of a "It's safe to stay with me, I will take care of you, don't worry". With all the stress I really felt my emotion losses its tense along with the song goes, and my tears came with a relived mood.
Of course there is still a lot more to do in real life right now. I hope all my friends are happy and being cared of even not by me; I am not in a perfect status right now but shouldn't complain, but for Xmas I wish.........
wake up to have my boyfriend be by my side, we both snuggling and wrapped in same blanket, me cuddle my head in his chest and head snug against his chin, we would drink cups of hot cocoa by a big glass window, watching snow flakes fall, feel satisfied, feel being cared of.
Only if I have a boyfriend :) Oh well~ I am not sad this time though!
At least I finally got a xmas gift lava lamp in 9 years *off to sleeps and turns lava lamp on* :3
It's rather weird, when I heard the catchy music and about to sing along, something stuck in my throat, then I couldn't stop my watering eyes, dropped a few before I reach the parking lot. Christmas music never really meant much to me besides they are really just songs, some are old and some are recent and some you probably don't want to hear twice in a day lol.
I have been writing cards to people since last week, and lack quite a lot of sleep for more than a week now. Some friends don't want me to stress myself out but...after seeing people face to face, maybe exchange some life stories online and update FA and LJ, we don't always interact with each other that much in life, especially the ones that are living from different states. So I just wanted to show my appreciation, put a bit more efforts in each card, show them that I care, and hope each person feel special even for a second. That's the least I can do.
But this lacking of sleep and stress from work, we had a few people left in December so my work load and duties increased, really makes me tired, probably feel much less like back in school days just before the finals. When I heard the song rudolph the red nosed reindeer it felt just like a kind, warm hearted person, who's petting right on my head, saying "It's okay". It's just a mental imagination, but for a long time especially during this winter, that's my first time felt "Being cared of".
It's not like hearing a friend saying "I will cover you", but more of a "It's safe to stay with me, I will take care of you, don't worry". With all the stress I really felt my emotion losses its tense along with the song goes, and my tears came with a relived mood.
Of course there is still a lot more to do in real life right now. I hope all my friends are happy and being cared of even not by me; I am not in a perfect status right now but shouldn't complain, but for Xmas I wish.........
wake up to have my boyfriend be by my side, we both snuggling and wrapped in same blanket, me cuddle my head in his chest and head snug against his chin, we would drink cups of hot cocoa by a big glass window, watching snow flakes fall, feel satisfied, feel being cared of.
Only if I have a boyfriend :) Oh well~ I am not sad this time though!
At least I finally got a xmas gift lava lamp in 9 years *off to sleeps and turns lava lamp on* :3