Agh, work
Yo, I need to take a break from Black Witch once in a while. I work very hard on the column makin sure that it runs all nice and clean, it sometimes leaves me little room for myself. I thought it would be simple, write a column and put it up but no, it's not. Besides writing a column, I gotta respond to readers, fan mail, talk to folks I wouldn't otherwise chat with, fight with Afro-Punk endlessly about messing up my column. I am reaching a bit of the end of my rope with the column on Afro-Punk but it's the fan-interaction, man, I am not built for that. I am very introverted, it takes a lot out of me to be social, I am not a very social person. I have twitter, fan page and fan mail (yet utter lack of Ask Black Witch questions, wtf?) but I am not a super social person. I am the person that will scurry into a quiet corner and mind my phone for the whole event or hide away somewhere. I simply hate groups, I do go to more lolita meetups but still it's like "Do I wanna? Who's gonna be there? What are we doing? Do I still wanna?" and I just deal with it basically. My main exception being concerts (and even that depends) being social takes a lot out of me, if I were less that, I prolly would have more gusto for the rest of the column.
The problem with taking a break? It's my life, somehow it will become a "break" where I'm taking a break from Black Witch - only to deal with something else. That's not a genuine break, that's bouncing from one thing to the other.
It always seems like there's something I gotta do, I still have two pieces of fan mail that I have to respond to and to be honest, I kinda don't want to. One of the guys is kinda mental, like Nazi-ain't-that-bad-Jews-run-the-media mental, and another that I honestly think is trying to chat me up since the "Why Don't You Like Me?" column.
Y'know, usually I would sit here and go, "Why don't famous people talk to their fans? The fans are who made them what they are!" somewhat but now I see why: It's a lot of fscking work. As surprising as it is for me to say this, I am starting to grow a fanbase/readerbase and sooner or later, it's going to be harder and harder until near impossible to talk to each and every fan and reader. Dude, for Black Witch to keep breathin, I'ma have to cut back, I'm tellin you. As much as I'd like to have an extra person or extra life for social stuff, I simply can't. I'm not the type that's forever on Twitter, I'm not a texting fiend, I still hate Facebook and the fact it can't auto-update my fanpage, I'm not a constant debater, I really rather be by myself and chat with the supporters some of the time rather than be burnt out and talk with the supporters all of the time. Dude, I'm trying to avoid being fizzled out and part of avoiding fizzle-out-ness is cutting back. It's not the columns, they're fine, I can make new columns easily. I already made at least three new columns this week and got myself covered topic-wise until March (actually, April. March is Fandom and the Fan - speaking of which, I gotta pester Wondaland in a couple days, I haven't heard back from them at all about it. I hope that 2.0 snafu won't hold me back. ('Ey, not perfect.))
(And about April, I want to do a literary contest buuuuuuuut this is my last semester, a literary contest requires brains and devotion, something I'm not gonna have a lot of boppling about. If I opt out of lit. contest, I'll showcase poets)
I just need to catch a break. I don't want Black Witch breaking down because I can't get a moment of pause for myself. That would be bad. And so would burn out.