This cannot be real

Jun 13, 2011 22:28

You know, there is a class of events which usually happen to other people. Those kind of embarrasing strokes of luck like finding out you have an old forgotten billionaire uncle who has just died, or winning in the lottery or simply finding a good parking spot near the supermarket on a crowdy Saturday morning. And then, there are also the tragic events.
The tragic ones belong to this class, too.
Weird accidents. Strange illness.
Dangerous illness.
All of these horrible things can happen just to the others.
But, it comes a day you discover that you and your family belong to "The Others" class as well.
And it's a real nightmare.
You do not know how to react. You keep laughing like a mad woman repeating that it cannot be real. You scream and cry because there's no justice, no logic in a world that allows things like this one befall on a kind and gentle person like my husband.
But you have to smile and laugh, because you have a one year old son who cannot understand when you vaguely mention that his dad is going to stay in the hospital for some days. You start telling him sweet lies he cannot understand:"Dad's sleeping, dad's working, dad's gone to the supermarket".
But your son is not stupid, and he cannot understand but he knows there's something wrong and goes on calling:"Mummy...Daddy?".
And you watch him and smile.
You smile because you're absolutely sure that everything will go ok. Because that horrible thing in his brain is benign, so we'll have just to walk this hard and long path to recovery, but at the end everything will be just a bad memory.
You know it, the doctors said it and You simply know it.
You have just to tame your panic.
You have just to stop screaming like a mad woman at this cruel world, because this thing is terrible but perfectly conquerable.
You have just to hug your wonderful son, because he's still afraid of a door that slams, and he does not know there are worse things to be feared.

personal post, family

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