Ten Years (Part Two)
Title: Ten Years
Length: Two Parts
Pairing: YunJae
Genre: Angst, Romance, slight Fluff
Summary: Everyone knows Jaejoong never thinks before he acts, and we all were waiting for the day to come when he said the one thing that would get S. M. Entertainment shut down. It's been ten years since that day, but what has become of our precious Dong Bang Shin Ki?
Part One
S. M. Entertainment.
Yunho's cellphone slipped from his grasp. He barely registered it shattering on the pavement outside his apartment complex where he was standing. He couldn't move, stunned into paralysis. S. M. Entertainment. He hadn't heard that name in ten years. And with the name always came regret. Jaejoong. Now there's a name filled with regret. For him, and for the one it belonged to.
At the thought of the raven haired man, he snapped back into action, clutching his keys as he left the shattered remains of his phone. He pressed he unlock button on the tiny remote, yanking the driver's side door of his Jaguar open. He was halfway down the freeway by the time he noticed he didn't have his seatbelt on. He buckled it mechanically.
Why? Why would Jaejoong call him? Why now? He guessed that Kibum had given him his number, but why him when he had three other choices? It was true that they were the closest in DBSK. Were. That's the key word here. That day had changed everything.
Being the leader, he had yelled at him. No. Roared at him for saying what he did when they were shooting live on air. A part of him had broken with every flinch that Jaejoong made at his harsh words. But what had made the older man cry wasn't all his yelling. It was when he had grabbed his coat, about to leave, and as a parting gesture, said over his shoulder:
“Freak.”
There was not an hour that went by that he didn't regret saying it. Maybe if he hadn't, his Joongie would have come home. But he never did. But even if he had, there was nothing for him to come home to. Changmin threw all of his belongings in front of their blind landlord's mower (why would he be mowing when he was blind?). Yoochun was silent. No laugh. No disappointment. Nothing. It was like Jae's big news had shut him down. Junsu had cried. DBSK was over. His singing career was over. Which was weird. Out of all of them, you'd think that Junsu would be the one that showed sympathy for their lost lead singer. But no. Oddly, Junsu was broken because of his own self centered thoughts. Who would have thought? Maybe that's what shut Yoochun down.
Changmin was the worst. Yunho thought that Jaejoong's little angel that he put so much pride in ironically took a total turn. He was angry beyond reason. He hated Jae with such a passion that you would never believe that an hour before the interview, he had been telling Jae that he would always love him as long as he kept cooking. It had been a joke, of course, but oddly true. Without Jaejoong's cooking, they had to fend for ourselves, which in itself was hell. Changmin became more and more bitter, yelling at them and hitting them. He moved out in two weeks.
With him gone, the last three had a chance to think about Jaejoong's predicament more clearly. They cooled down easily, missing his smiling face. They searched for him for weeks, even using the authorities. He was never found.
That's the thing, Hyung. He never left.
Yunho's knuckles turned white as he gripped the steering wheel, his foot pressing harder on the gas. The one place they never thought to look. S. M. Entertainment. He should have been smarter. Of course Jaejoong would stay there. His everything was DBSK. He gnashed his teeth together with regret. Why did he have to ruin everything? The music wasn't what was important to Jaejoong. It was the members. And the members couldn't last without him. And they didn't. Without Jaejoong to keep them in check, their fights got out of hand, nearly killing each other a few times.
Yoochun moved out first. It was obvious that he was into Junsu, but after what happened when Jae came out of the closet, Yunho couldn't blame him for keeping his mouth shut. But that he was sure Chun could have lived with. It was Junsu's attitude that brought the moving out thing on. Their little duck butt had slowly began showing his true colors, colors that weren't pretty in the least. He was self centered. He was lazy. He was annoying. He was bossy, and he was not cute anymore. Yunho guessed that Yoochun just couldn't take it.
Then, as you would have guessed, he moved out. For the same reasons. He just didn't know Junsu anymore. Every night for the next year, he couldn't help but wonder what Jaejoong would have thought about this situation. Oh, how he missed that smile. How he missed looking into the kitchen every morning and finding his Joongie, singing their new single while frying eggs. How he missed walking up and surprising Jaejoong by hugging him from behind.
Damn, was he crying? He wiped away his tears with a sigh. He had found Yoochun, and they were now very close. He couldn't wait to call him and tell him that he found Jaejoong. He would do that now, but.... his phone was a little broken.
He screeched to a stop, stepping out of the car quickly. He stared up at the S. M. Entertainment building. It was in ruins.
“Oppa!” He turned to see a little girl, around the age of five, waving at him from the door of a restaurant. He smiled, waving back, but became serious when she yelled at him, “If you're looking for Jaejae-oppa, he's in here!”
He rushed over, pushing the door open. The restaurant was familiar. He could remember eating here with DBSK and their manager. Laughing. Having fun. Who would have known that it could all end with Jae's slip on live radio?
The little girl took his hand, leading him through the maze of tables to a secluded booth by the window. He stared as Kibum saw him. He stood curtly, studying his face. “It's been a long time, Hyung.”
He didn't want to put up with bullshit smalltalk right then, so he cut to the chase. “Where is he?”
“Hi, Yunho...”
He was lost for words. Jae's frame was even smaller than when he last saw him, most likely from starvation. His ebony hair went past his shoulders, his ragged bangs covering one eye. He had on a black hoodie that was far too big for him, hugging it to him like he was ice cold. His one eye was sad, but it was Jaejoong's doe eye, that was unmistakable. But his voice and smile scared Yunho. They were both so weak.
Jae limped forward. Oh, god he was limping. Did he break his leg? Did he lose a leg and was using a fake one now? Were his bones so brittle that they were steadily waisting away into nothing? Did he die and wanted to come back and as payment for life he had to be handicapped?
He was broken from his thoughts by a musical laugh. “None of the above, you dummy...”
Oh, he had said those out loud. Ten feet. There were ten feet between them. Jae dropped his eyes from his intense stare. He couldn't help it.
Jae gulped. Was Yunho still angry at him? He wanted so much to be forgiven. He didn't want to get too close (okay, he did but he didn't want to get hit) so he stayed where he was.
The manager of the restaurant came out, informing them that they had five minutes to leave. The four adults checked their watches. 6:30.
“Honey?” Kibum looked at his wife. “We really should get going...” Kibum nodded, turning to the former Gods of the Rising East. “Hyungs?”
Jae smiled at him. “I live across the street. It's fi-”
“Jaejoong will be coming with me,” said Yunho, not taking his eyes off the raven haired man. Jaejoong stared at him. Oh god, he thought, He's going to murder me in his car.
“No,” countered Jae, a little scared, “I can make it on my own.”
“You're going with Yunho,” said Kibum's family, Kibum and child included.
That was how he found himself in a shiny, midnight blue Jaguar, heading toward Yunho's apartment at 80 miles per hour.
The silence was maddening, an awkwardness not known to their friendship lingering in the air. Jaejoong, needing some noise, reached to turn on the radio, but was stopped by Yunho's voice.
“Don't.” They locked eyes. “Why?” Yunho asked, finally.
Jae was glad the silence was broken. “Why what?” he asked, a little too excitedly.
Yunho found it cute. “Why did you call me?”
“Kibum had your number.”
“He also has Yoochun's.”
Jae cringed. “He didn't tell me that.”
“So you would have called Yoochun if you knew?” Yunho wasn't jealous. Not at all.
Jaejoong thought about it. He answered uncertainly. “Yeah.”
That hurt. “Why?” Yunho asked. Jae noted the disappoint in his tone.
“It's safer with him.”
“I'm not going to stab you,” his words were bitter. Jae was silent. He sighed. “You lived on the street for ten years? How did you survive?”
Jae snickered. Yunho glanced at him. “What?”
“You and Kibum are so quick to conclusions. You didn't even ask me. Neither did he.”
“What do you mean?”
“Have you noticed that I'm clean?” Yunho glanced at him long enough to get a good look. No grease. No facial hair. Just... Jaejoong. Jae smiled. “One of the vendors on the side of the road I live on offered me a job. If I cook, they will give me food and necessities.”
Yunho bit his lip in confusion. “Then why didn't you correct Kibum?”
Jae didn't answer. Yunho grew impatient. “Well?”
“I knew that he was going to tell you how desperate for a home I was.”
“And?”
Jae smiled wryly. “If you didn't think I needed you, would you have come?”
There was a screech as Yunho pulled over, scaring his friend. He pressed the lock button, locking all the doors. Jaejoong actually thought that he was about to be killed.
“Wait! Yun-” He was cut off when Yunho reached over, pulling him into a bear hug. He stiffened, not expecting the sudden contact. He relaxed, finally, melting in Yunho's strong arms. This wasn't good. Any longer and he would kiss him.
Then Yunho whispered in his ear. “How could you even think that I wouldn't come for you no matter what?” Jae liked that. But a little too much, so he let go first.
“But... don't you hate me?” He asked and Yunho stared at him, now on their respective sides of the car.
“No! I could never hate you for over a month.”
Jae smiled at that. “But, you said I was-”
“I know what I said,” he cut him off. Jae gulped. “And there's not a minute that goes by that I don't regret it.”
His friend smiled. “You really think of me that much?”
Yunho looked away, smiling a little as well. “Yeah,” he said sheepishly.
“I still ruined everything. I got everyone fired.”
Those two sentences loomed in the air like a virus. “Well,” sighed Yunho, “You got all of S. M. Entertainment shut down by saying you're gay on live radio. And there were the video cameras, so it was on live TV as well.”
Jaejoong bowed his head. Yunho watched him curiously, before finishing, “Which is only something my Joongie can do, so be proud. I know I am.”
Jaejoong stared up at him, blushing madly, which caused them both to look away. They were silent for a while, studying the interior of Yunho's car.
“How did Junsu and Yoochun take it?” asked Jae, trying to change the subject. Yunho winced. He explained what their dongsaengs had done after the whole shut down incident had happened. He was surprised when Jaejoong smiled brightly.
“I was sure that they all hated me, so it's good to know that at least Yoochun still loves me.”
Yunho stared at him intensely, watching him. Jae felt a blush coming on, so he looked away. He continued to feel more uncomfortable as the former U-Know continued to stare. He gasped when Yunho leaned forward, boring into his eyes. Jae was sure that he looked like a tomato, but Yunho took no notice, giving him the “don't you lie to me” look.
“Why didn't you ask about Changmin, Jaejoong?” That broke the spell. Jaejoong looked away, tears already welling up in his eyes as he tried to push the younger man away.
“He must have slipped my mind,” he lied. He tried harder, but Yunho was too strong.
“Changmin never slips your mind, Jaejoong,” probed Yunho. “You saw him.”
“No, I didn't!” yelled Jaejoong, trying his hardest to sound convincing. Yunho wiped away his tears gently. His hands felt so warm on his skin.
“You're crying...” Yunho whispered incredulously. “What did he do, Jae?”
Jae shook his head. “I didn't see him!” he screamed.
“What did he do, Jae? Tell me what he did.”
“Nothing happened!”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“Nothing!”
“What did he do, Jaejoong?”
“Yunho, please!”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.” His words were so gentle and soothing, they scared him. He was so cruel, using his weakness against him.
“No... He didn't do anything.”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“Nothing...” he was crying now.
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“Please stop.”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“No...”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“Stop it!”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“Stop! Just stop!”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“No!”
“Tell me what he did, Jae.”
“No.”
“Tell me what he did!”
“HE RAPED ME!”
A silence filled the car as Yunho stared down at the sobbing Jaejoong. He had pushed Jae down and was now straddling his waist. Jae glared up at him through his tears, punching his chest halfheartedly. “Are you happy now? Now you know.... He raped me, Yunho. Just three hours ago to be exact. Do you want to go back? I bet he's still in the area, probably eating at that same fucking restaurant that we were just at.”
Yunho was stunned, ogling down at the broken 34 year old, as if seeing him for the first time. Jae continued. “He found me by accident. He offered me money. I recognized him, and like an idiot, I told him who I was. I didn't know that he was going to...” *sob * “I got up and hugged him, and wasn't surprised when he didn't hug me back. He hit me, and yelled at me, Yunho, over and over he kept hitting me. I just wanted him to stop...” *sob * “But then he flipped me onto my stomach, pinning me to the ground, saying that if I was gay all I was good for was...” He broke off into a fit of sobs. Yunho leaned down, shushing him, but he continued anyway, “He said that I was only good for a one time up the ass... And all I could think was how much I wanted him to just hit me again, to fucking kill me, anything but this... And, Yunho, you know whose name I kept screaming like an idiot to save me? It was you! Even after ten years, you're the one I need to stay by my side. I kept screaming, Yunho, but you didn't come... And then the rain came in your place...” Yunho closed his eyes, clenching his fists until the skin of his knuckles was white.
“I'm going to kill him,” he seethed through clenched teeth, getting off of Jaejoong and into the driver's seat. Jaejoong sat up.
“No! Please, let us just go home!”
Yunho studied his face. He really wanted to see Shim blood on the pavement right now, but Jaejoong looked terrified. He sighed. “Fine. I'll take you home.” He started up the Jaguar, heading down the road once more.
Jaejoong watched him carefully. “You're going to go looking for him after you drop me off, aren't you?”
Yunho gritted his teeth. “It doesn't concern you.”
“I would say that a I am very concerned. I 'm the one you're avenging! Don't do it Yunho, please.”
“You can't stop me, Jaejoong-ah.”
Jae looked forward, furious. “This is exactly why I didn't want to tell you!”
Yunho snorted. “You don't think I'll win?”
Jae glowered at him. “No, I think you will win and end up killing someone for me! Which is what I'm trying to avoid!”
“You can't change my mind.”
“Whatever. Think of your wife and kids!”
Yunho turned curious. “Wife and kids? What wife and kids?”
Jae stared at him oddly. “When we were on the phone, that little girl...”
Yunho laughed. “My niece.”
“She called you Appa!”
“She called me oppa, Jaejoong. You heard wrong.”
Well, that cleared things up. Jae pinched the bridge of his nose. “Don't change the subject! Think about your nieces and nephews, then!”
“Not stopping me,” he replied stubbornly.
Jae threw his hands up. “Yah! I've always hated this part of you!”
“Like every other part of me, I guess,” he muttered darkly.
Jaejoong's ears perked up at that. “Excuse me?”
“You hate me. Don't even try denying it.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? Of course I don't.”
Yunho slammed on the breaks, stopping the car in the middle of the road. Luckily, there were no cars behind them or Jae would have choked him. Yunho glared at him.
“Stop acting all nice. I know you hate me.”
“What the hell? Stop trying to give me whiplash! And why would I hate you?”
“After I called you a freak that day, you never came home. Confirming that you hate me.”
“I don't hate you!” Where had he gotten that idea? It was the total opposite of what he really felt.
“Whatever. Deny it if you want.”
“I don't!”
“Sure.”
“Yunho, you have to believe me!”
“I don't, but I guess that you-mmnph!” He was cut short by Jaejoong's lips on his. Jaejoong couldn't stop himself. He had cupped his cheeks with his hands while he was distracted. When he pulled back, Yunho stared at him.
“Jaejoong...” he whispered. “Why?”
“I don't hate you.” Jae's voice was small, and he couldn't look Yunho in the eye. He hid his face behind his hair. “Quite the contrary, actually.”
A honk was heard, startling Yunho into driving forward. The rest of the ride was silent. When he had parked in front of his apartment, Yunho turned to Jaejoong, who still refused to look at him. “Jaejoong... explain.”
Jaejoong's eyes narrowed. “Explain what?”
“Joongie...”
He sighed, meeting Yunho's eyes. “From the first time I saw you, I knew that I wanted to be more than friends with you, but you were so bent on just being friends. As the years went on and on, I fell more and more... in love with you.”
Yunho's mouth opened slightly, but he quickly closed it. “We were such good friend's,” Jae continued, “and I didn't want to ruin that. But I wanted so much more. You chased women, I knew that, but I always saw something more, as did our fans. It came to a point that I couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to give a hint that I wanted a romantic relationship with you. And, I poorly made the decision right there and then to say something. But that something, instead of helping, ended all our lives.”
Yunho snickered halfheartedly. “You never did think before you acted.”
He laughed weakly, too. “Yeah, guess I still don't...”
He coughed. “Well, my sister and her kids should be gone by now, so-”
“Yunho, please don't! I'll do anything!” Jae didn't want him to kill anyone. And Changmin was not worth the trouble, anyway.
He smirked. “Anything?” Jae froze. He didn't like the sound of that.
“Um... yeah?” he said slowly.
Yunho turned to him, cocking his head to the side. “Kiss me again.”
Jae almost choked on his own spit. “What?”
“Kiss me.” he repeated. Uneasily, Jaejoong leaned forward, pressing his lips to Yunho's. When he pulled back, Yunho licked his lips, then, “Again.”
Jae did it again, but this time Yunho grabbed him, forcing his tongue past his lips. “Mnn...” Jae moaned into the kiss, letting Yunho lead. While the older man was preoccupied, Yunho opened the door, pulling him out of the car. He lifted his frail body up bridal style, still kissing him.
Jae broke the kiss. “Yunho! What are you doin-ah!”
Yunho had snaked his hand up his Joongie's shirt, playing with his nipples. He kicked the door to his apartment open (he could buy a new lock later), carrying Jaejoong into the bedroom, sucking on his neck.
“Ah... ah... Yunho,” moaned Jaejoong, trying to talk, “we... nnn... we should slow down.... AH!”
He was thrown on the bed, Yunho looming over him. He gasped when Yunho pulled off his shirt, throwing it aside. That muscular chest was something he had craved for for almost 17 years now.
Yunho's seductive eyes roamed over his rumpled state. “But, Joongie, we have to make up for ten years, right?”
Jaejoong gulped. “You like women!”
Yunho chuckled huskily at that. “But you are just too fucking sexy to pass up.”
His Joongie gaped at him. “Then I'm convenient?!” he yelled.
Yunho began to pull off Jaejoong's shirt before two snow white hands grabbed his, stopping him. He looked up into tear filled eyes, immediately making him stop. “Jaejoong?”
Jae begged. “Yunho, please. Let's stop... it... it still hurts...”
Yunho felt ashamed. He leaned down, scooping up the older man into his arms gently. “It's okay, Jae. We'll wait until you're ready...” Jae hugged him back.
After ten years, he was finally his. They could finally be together. The ten years was avenged.
Kibum and his wife left their business meeting slowly, still plagued with thoughts of Jaejoong. As they got into the car, his wife turned to him.
“Kibum?”
“Hmm?”
“Who do you think raped Jaejoong?”
Kibum sighed. “I don't know. He looks so feminine, any drunk would...”
The woman was silent. “Let's drive by S. M. Entertainment and see if he's there,” she suggested.
Kibum growled. “He better not be.”
They drove past the crumbling building, slowing down and lowering their windows.
“Honey, who's that?” the woman asked. Kibum looked where she was pointing. In Jae's usual spot sat a new figure, taller and younger. “I don't know,” he said. “But it isn't Jaejoong.”
They drove away, a pair of mismatched eyes following their car.
“Oppa?”
Changmin reached out, taking the offered 100 won coin.
A/N: I stayed up until 6 in the morning to write this. Wow, this is a really long one shot, but I didn't want to start another chaptered fic. Sooooooooooooooo, what did you think? I don't even read angst, but I just had this thought in my head and couldn't help but to get it down on paper. I know that it's dark, but I think that if Jae did come out of the closet, this is one of the things that might happen-DBSK's reactions, I mean. But I think after a while of Jae's good cooking, they would just accept it.
Bye, for now! :)