(no subject)
[From a fanfiction meme I filled out awhile back]
9.Are there any fanfiction trends/clichés you can't stand or are just sick of?
High school AUs. Legendary Pokemon High School AUs. But I’ll admit that they could be great fun if done in small doses.
So as a joke, my friend "BC" began writing me snippets of a high school AU.
Dec. 14
-Latias-chan watched him from across the hall, unable to do or say anything. She had a deep love for Zekrom-senpai, but would Latios onii-san ever allow it? Her heart pitter-pattered all the way.
Dec. 14
-"Latias-chan!" she heard someone calling from behind; it was Moltres-san, from the theater club. "What are you doing here, you baka? The classes are about to start!"
Flustered, Latias-chan hurriedly followed her childhood friend along - she didn't want to make Regigigas-sensei angry. Her love would need to wait..."
"I just realized that you posted those fanfics as respond to my saying I hate Legendary Pokemon High School AUs. I HATE YOU"
It was incredibly silly but I enjoyed it...then it just kept on happening.
Dec. 16
-They quickly reached their classroom, where the stern yet gentle Regigigas-sensei patiently counted the minutes for the start of the class. Blushing with embarassment, Latias-chan hurriedly joined her classmates. While waiting for the bell to ring, she looked around to see which of her friends were present: there was Raikou-kun, from Rippongai - he was such a yankee! Also there was one of the new transfer students, Dennis-kun - he was nice, but a little crazy. Another of her old friends was Regice-chan, Regigigas-sensei's daught--
*CRASH-BAMF*
"Kyaaaaaaa!"
"Naniiiiiii?!
"OMGGGGGGGG!!"
It all happened so suddenly. Without warning, a flash of light bursted overhead the class, and something - or things - fell from it, bringing great confusion to the students, who were unable to see under the cloud of dust. Slowly but surely, the cloud started to dissipate, and three different voices could be heard from within:
"Ow ow OW!What the hell did you do, you stupid frog?!"
"It's ya own fault for goin' after that thing without tellin' us. There's NO way ya didn't see me aimin' at it."
"The more you prolong this unnecessary discussion, the less we'll know about our situation. Now... where are we?"
Latias-chan's heart pitter-pattered all the way.
"-BUT WHO WAS DENNIS-KUN?!
-I think I recognize Faive but I don't know who the other are. :C
-Moltres-sanxLatias-chan dammit"
Dec. 18
-Soon enough, the dust cloud subsided, revealing the three mysteryous figures. Much to the students shock (and mixed reactions), the newcomers - a man and two women - unlike the fully-uniformized class, were completely nude. At least one of the girls (the wormy yellow one standing on an unconcious Sui-kun) had the decency to wear a shell.
"Ooh, now it's MY fault for trying to help you out? Thanks a lot for the camaderie" snapped the white-colored girl, who was bickering with the lanky purple lad. "Maybe the next time we fight a murder machine, I'll leave to handle it all yourself!"
"Ya just don' get it, do ya?!" continued the man, visibly aggravated. "I was goin' straight for a finishin' move, when ya showed up suddenly and made me hit the wrong spot. We didn' need to get caught by some crazy explosion and..."
The shelled woman appeared to medidate, while muttering to herself about "patience" and resisting the urge to punch the floor.
"Ah-hem. Excuse me..." Regigigas-sensei took a step forward, calling the attention of both visitors and students (who were busy shouting "What's going on?", "Kyaaaa! Hentai!", "Who are these guys?", amongst other lines). "I am Regigigas-sensei, and I welcome you to our school. Now, I believe some explanations are in order."
It took a moment for the three strangers to notice their surroundings; all around them, there were fully-dressed pokémon - and not just any pokémon...
"You... you are Regigigas?" asked the yellow one, surprised. "The one who knotted the continets together, and leader of the three golems? Just what is going on?"
"Pardon me?" asked Regigigas-sensei, confused.
"Wait a second... there's a whole freakin' pantheon here!" shouted the purple man, suddenly excited and pointing at students. "That one's Zapdos, the thunderbird! There's also Mesprit, avatar of emotions! And there's also this big, purple insectoid... thing... who the hell are ya?"
"I KILLED THE DINOSAURS!!" yelled Dennis-kun, much to everyone's aggrievance.
The white girl just stood where she was, both terrified by the presence of all these myths and titans, and also holding her laugher for how ridiculous they looked on those clothes.
That doesn't really answer any questions." Regigigas-sensei continued. "Now, if you could..."
The newcomers were his own characters and...well, pretty much everything is an inside joke. I thought that was the end of that. Then...
Jan 2
'Nobody asked, but here it is: because this couldn't be left unfinished.
-"Great Regigigas," said the yellow one, "we sincerely apologize for our intrusion in this sacred realm of the ancients." She was sternly kneeling down, as if in the presence of a king. Regigigas-sensei was still confused, and starting to feel uncomfortable.
"Sacred realm? Ancients?" He had no idea why that woman was treating him - and apparently, his students - with such reverence. "I think there must be some misunderstanding, miss... this is a school, not a temple. And we most certainly aren't "ancients" of any kind."
"SAYS YOU!!" shouted again Dennis-kun, to general miscontent.
"Ya know... I'm startin' to think there's somethin' different about this." said the purple lad to the kneeling lady. "Why the hell are all these legends wearin' clothes? And the bald guy doesn' sound very imponent or anythin'."
"Don't call him like that - be more respectful with the Regi king." she replied, with complete seriousness.
"But he just said that--"
"You two let me handle this" interrupted the white one, pushing them aside. "I think I have this figured out..." She approached Regigigas-sensei, and put on her most sugary expression.
"Ah, Sensei! We're soooooo sorry! But it was an accident--" she was interrupted by a punch to the face from Shaymin-san, the class president.
"Don't get close to sensei, you lecherous woman! Hentai!" she had a very conservative upbringing, and her outburst was slightly justified.
"Ooch... what was that for, you flowery prick?! I'm going to show you--"
"Don't you dare!!" shouted the yellow girl, with alarm. "It's inconceivable to try to fight with any of them!"
"If you haven't noticed, these guys AREN'T gods. Whatever stupid dimension or whatever we have ended on, it's obvious that they can't... oh wait, she just started absorbing the dust from the floor... oh, crap." The last thing the white girl saw before falling unconscious was Shaymin-san's fully-charged Seed Flare flying straight at her.
"You went a little too far, Shaymin-chan~" said her boyfriend, Celebi-kun. Not everyone liked him very much - he was prone to play some very inconvenient pranks with his abilities, and was very smug. "It's not like she knew how strong you were... oh, what's this?~" he noticed the lanky lad holding his arm like a cannon, and pointing to him and his girlfriend.
"Most of the time, she gets beaten like this after doin' somethin' nasty or stupid, so I let it pass" he seemed strangely serious. "But this time, she didn' get to do anythin' too bad, and you shot a freakin' explosion on her face."
"She was trying to s--"
"YA THINK I'LL LET YA BEAT MY COMRADES FOR NO GOOD REASON?!" he shot a Vacuum Wave from his hand, which Shaymin-san and Celebi-kun managed to dodge on time, only to pass through
Giratina-san and destroy a wall. Most of the students were confused and afraid, but a small group composed of Raikou-kun, Groudon-san, and Darkrai-chan approached him, visibly offended.
"Ya wanna fight, uh? There's Mach Fives for everyone, so bring it!" Suddenly, his face lightened up, as if he had a great revelation. "Oh yeah... I like where this is goin'. Stranded on another world, we pick a fight with its inhabitants. Durin' our long stay here, we will start to see the meanin' of our power, and how it is nothin' compared to our spirits. We will make friends, meet new places, and have battle after battle with the best fighters this world has to offer!" The group standing in front of him had no idea what that was about. "It will be a story of action! Emotion! Tears! Laugher! Romance!!" Latias-chan's heart pitter-pattered all the way. "This will be one of the greatest adventures ever written... and it will start now!!
So get ready to FACE THE WORL--"
"... and we need to return post haste. Can you help us, great professor Regigigas?" said the shelled girl.
"Oh, certainly" politely answered Regigigas-sensei. "Palkia-kun, could you do us this favor?"
"Leave it to me-kia!" said Palkia-kun, from the music club. He immediatly slashed at the air, and opened a translucent portal. "This should take you back to your home dimension-kia! But you will probably forget everything about ours-kia!"
"This is fine by me. I humbly thank you for your assistance, great professor Regigigas, and dimension lord Palkia." the shelled girl said, kneeling down once more.
"You're welcome-kia!" Palkia-kun said, before grabbing her and the other girl, and tossing them inside. The man had barely time to say "Hey, what's happenin' with my--" before being tossed as well, and the portal closed. At that moment, the school bell rang.
"Listen well, everyone: we will have a 10-minute dalay to fix the classroom." said Regigigas-sensei, as if that was a common situation. "And then we will start the classes. Understood?"
"Haaai." Most of the students answered.
"Celebi-chan? What's so funny?" asked Shaymin-chan, who noticed her boyfriend smirking.
"Oh, it's nothing~" he said, his smirk turning into a smug smile.
"I know that face... did you pull one of your pranks on one of them? Which one was it?" she asked, unsure whether to find this funny or worrying.
"Who knows~"
The next installment will wrap everything up. With a special warning at the beginning!"
Jan. 7
"...Now let's end this nonsense.
Carl sighed, still trying to understand how such a promising evening went downhill so quickly. Earlier that day, he had received a call from a foreign scientist of some renown - someone he had been trying to contact since the beginning of his brief visit to Sinnoh - greenlighting a visit to his summer house for an interview. The man, one Dr. Ludestein, wasn't half as famous as he was on his homeland, but some of his achievements on the study of evolution stones made him slightly well-known around the world. His most recent research involved the potential properties of the everstone, whose results would be made public in a few weeks; and Carl was ecstastic not only with the chance of getting a scoop ahead of most journalists - including Gabby from Hoenn - but also with the permission granted to take pictures of the prototype invention that resulted from these studies.
However, things went differently than he expected upon reaching the place; following the "advice" given by Reptile (who was just complaining about how hungry he was feeling at the moment), Carl decided to enter the house through the backdoor warehouse, since that was the place where the doctor would most likely be waiting for him. Instead, he triggered the security alarms, and was immediatly confronted by an enraged Ludestein. Without even caring to learn the identity of the trepasser, Carl was accused of being one of "Kaminko's dogs", who had come there to steal his "instrument of personal revenge". Before the reporter could have any idea what was going on, Ludestein unveiled and entered a reasonably big robotic machine, modeled after a white and draconic-looking pokémon; it was powered by a proportionally enormous everstone, located quite visibly on the mecha's head. Carl had barely enough time to call out his entire team before being attacked.
It was an arduous and (quite frankly) ridiculous battle, and despite outnumbering him considerably, the seven pokémon (and trainer) were barely able to defeat the doctor and his machine. Uderzo had been the great hero of the night, taking a critical attack on his shell for the team, and still managing to gather his strengh to deliver the finishing blow after three of his teammates weakened the mecha by (apparently) attacking the everstone directly. While he was well aware of the merits for defeating what was, by all accounts, a robo-tank, Carl still knew that this visit had been a complete waste of time; the interviewee tried to kill him, the invention was destroyed, the whole story went kaput, and one of his pokémon, while alive, had been gravely injured. And he had another immediate pressing concern - the small explosion caused by the everstone, and his three pokémon caught in the blast.
The smoke cloud hadn't subsided, but Carl and the other pokémon (sans Uderzo, who was eating as usual) were relieved to see Erza walking out from it, pulling an unconscious Rukina with her; the latter was knocked out, but didn't seem to be seriously hurt, while the former just looked tired. However, Faive was still nowhere to be seen...
"Girls! Man, thank goodness you are fine... well, sort of. Come back, Rukina..." Carl said, approaching them and recalling the froslass back to her pokéball. "There's still Faive left, though... let's wait this smoke clear out." Candide looked worried about Rukina's state, but he knew she had went through worse.
["For..."] said Erza, directing herself to her teammates. ["... for how long were we out?"]
["The stone exploded ten seconds ago, so... yes, I guess it was this much!"] said York, still happy to see the two of them were relatively ok. ["Are you feeling well, Erza?"]
["I suppose... this must have been a shock for my senses."] she answered, still feeling a bit dizzy. ["But I will be fine. Thank you for the concern."]
["Munch*munch*"] Uderzo nodded, still eating like there wasn't a horrific crack on his shell.
"I'm done for... do as you please." the group was surprised by an unexpected voice - it was Dr. Ludestein, hanging in defeat from the machine's cockpit. "Go, humiliate me as he would!!"
"Doctor..." Carl was unsure what to do. The man had attacked him just moments ago, and he was still waiting for the smoke to subside to look for his missing toxicroak... on the other hand, now he looked sufficiently harmless (and most importantly, sane). "... WHAT are you talking about?! And why did you attack us in the first place?"
"Don't try to play fool with me!" he said, still keeping some of his anger. "Why else would you try to enter my home through the backdoor, other than try to sabotage my weapon against your employer?"
"What in..." Carl didn't understand everything, but now he knew enough. "... look, doctor. I'm not working for anybody, and I had no idea you had your invention here. My pokémon thought you would be waiting us here, and... I guess it was a misunderstanding. Sorry!"
"One moment. You say I was waiting for you?" the doctor asked. "So that means..."
"Yeah, I'm that journalist you called." Carl was happy to see he was willing to listen now.
"Carl Paiva, freelance reporter - at your service! ... it's a little late for that now, I guess."
"Now that I think about it, if that wretched Kaminko were to sent anyone to do his bidding, it would be that midget... wait, so I..." Ludestein steadly bacame aware of the situation. "... good Arceus, I did a mistake."
"Doctor, you don't need to worry about this..." Carl was feeling a little sorry for him. "I mean, I was by all intents trepassing your property! This was just a misun--"
"How should I not worry?! Look what I've done!!" Ludestein was furious again, this time with himself. "One of my best everstones, blown to bits! My precious Robo-Reshiram, destroyed beyond repair! Your torterra--" he pointed at Uderzo, still eating and not caring about his exposed backside. "--look at it!!"
"Ok, so I agree Uderzo didn't need to get his shell cracked open..." the reporter did agree with the scientist, but didn't want to be blunt about it. "But it's not like you didn't do anything unforgivable, right?"
["*COUGH* What the hell is up with all this smoke?!"] All in the warehouse, human and pokémon alike, got their attention directed to the dissipating cloud, and the voice that came from it.
["Did we beat that thing? Erza? *COUGH* Rukina? Where the hell are ya?"] With small steps,
Faive walked to a clearer space to meet his comrades and opponent. ["There ya are! Looks like we got the job done"] he said, admiring the wrecked machine. Erza was confused, York surprised.
["Heh. As dumb as that manuever was, it looks like Rukina did get a shot helpin' us brin' this thing down - ya gotta respect that!"] Candide started to stutter, Uderzo dropped the food from his mouth - and started to feel a bit of pain. ["Where is she, anyway? Don' tell me that explosion... why are ya lookin' at me like that?"]
"Don't tell me... the everstone!!" Ludestein banged his head against the Robo-Reshiram's control panel, Carl stared focusedly at Faive, trying to see something.
"Hum... why is that croagunk wearing Faive's focus sash?"
["Huh?"]
Reptile was unable to react - all he could think of was how glad he was for not having evolved yet AND being on Faive's place.
EPILOGUE (not exactly, but whatever - [ http://homestuck.bandcamp.com/track/wacky-antics ] )
-For all his trouble, Carl actually managed to write the story he was there for, with pictures and everything - since Ludestein's invention for the public obviously wasn't the Robo-Reshiram.
Instead, it was a collar for the practical accomodation of everstones, leaving space for a second hold item - not exactly ground-breaking news.
For promising to stay quiet about this incident (as well as an apology for what happened with Uderzo and Faive), Ludestein gave Carl an entire box of everstones, and a rare(?) TM from his homeland. Carl kept the TM and sold the everstones, but he'd rather have his payment doubled. "All in a work's day, I guess."
-Faive did indeed devolve into a croagunk. After a through analisis, Ludestein confirmed that this wasn't a permanent change - with enough battles, he should gather enough experience to evolve again into a toxicroak. However, there's no telling when this will happen... and while Faive couldn't care less how he looks, Carl interpreted his enthusiastic declarations as a cry for help - and vowed to help him evolve as soon as possible. "Short and weaker? This doesn't change who I am! If you don' get this, get ready to open that door, and FACE THE WORLD!!"
-After a good night's rest, Erza regained her full strengh. She still trains, waiting for the day she will have to give her all for a good cause. "I have to be prepared - no, I WILL be."
-Rukina soon recovered, and had a good laugh with Faive's devolution. She eventually found out who that robot was based on, and added this to her feud against fire type pokémon. "You're not allowed to do anything without an adult's supervision, ok? KYAHAHAHAHA!... meh, it's not funny if you don't care."
-Dr. Ludestein's invention had modest sales in Sinnoh, and he eventually returned to his home in Unova. Re-thinking his actions, he decided it was stupid to hold a grudge against the Orre scientist for breaking his science project back in the third grade. "Humph... at least Robo-Zekrom will be something that will benefit mankind."
-Uderzo had to go through intensive care to treat his broken shell. He is walking and not feeling pain, but the injury will keep him out of battles for an indeterminate time. "Munch*munch*chomp. Ahem."
-Absolutely nothing happened with Candide. His feelings for Rukina are still transparent. "To regress to a previous evolutionary state... this backwards, antithesis to progress, what impact should it have on one's perception of his place in the world? The loss of power and mass is something that gives a new perspective to the act of being... is it positive and beneficial? To evolve or not devolve? How should we feel about the prospect of returning to ones roots?! And..."
-York started working with Carl's mom at Mauville's Post Office, and will stay out of battles for a while as well - Carl is currently deciding who will fill his spot on the team. He's still pretty much the same. "Bye, father! I'll go to Solaceon as often as I can, so see you soon!"
-Reptile filled Uderzo's spot on the team, and is happy to be "officially" back in action. He's still a treecko, and peeved about it. "Note to self: stay as far away as possible from everstones."
-Dana wasn't introduced yet, so let's leave it at that. "What? Isn't it my turn now? Ooh, I hope this doesn't take too long..."
-Latias-chan, after many humorous and dramatic misadventures, eventually found her true love with Moltres-kun. "Latios-oniisan still doesn't approve, but who cares about what that baka thinks? *pitter*patter*pitter*patter*"
-Regigigas-sensei was eventually promoted to an administrative position at Rejenderi Gakkou. He does a wonderful job. "And this is how we should deal with inter-dimensional visiting expenses."
-Celebi-kun is still a smug jerk. "Oh, my~"
-Palkia-kun's play won the school's club tournament. He's ecstastic. "Great job, everyone-kia! BANZAI-kia!!"
-Our most esteemed Brazillian Critic is still angry we just allowed one forword from him. "Here's two more: f*** you."
THE END"
I hadn't known my bro BC, for a long but his current writing level is leap and bounds better than when I first knew him, especially the last part. I felt so proud of him, even if everything was half-sill. :') That and the fact that he 'ended' the series with my OTP4eva. AHAHAHAHAHAH. He did add one last thing.
Jan. 15
"After graduation, Dennis-kun became a history teacher at Rejenderi Gakkou. The students hate him. "THE ROMAN EMPIRE FELL TO MY HANDS!!"
Joaquin Walters has no idea these events ever happened, and likely never will. He's still bitter about some stuff in his life. "Madam, I refuse to pay 600p for a bottle of milk."
[The author] made some instant noodles after finishing this. "Upon retrospect, I put way too much effort into this."
xD He isn't especially prone to making silly things and certainly not writing fics when he has so many going on with his life. The fact that he did, even out of some weird sense of obligation, put a huge smile on my face. Man, why am I so sappy. It's all just a big joke.
And so, of course, I had to make some fanart.
If you can't tell any of the characters, that's okay. I can't draw either.
Gen V countdown. I think the current count is six down, five to go? (My best wishes to you, Mat!) Bonus Dennis-kun gijinka because he is the best and I love him.
I honestly thought Dennis-kun was some weirdo human conspiracy nut thrown in to contrast with all the other students at REJENDERI GAKKOU.
I think he was disappointed that I haven't caught on yet and finally flat out told me that Dennis was that Bug Legendary Pokemon... And then I accidentally spoilered B&W events for both of us. OH WELL.
Speaking of love and weird pairings.
I pretty much lost it at 'snow angels'.
Blah. Damn love calculators. I'm having trouble channeling Law Hero but that's another journal for...whenever.
9.Are there any fanfiction trends/clichés you can't stand or are just sick of?
High school AUs. Legendary Pokemon High School AUs. But I’ll admit that they could be great fun if done in small doses.
So as a joke, my friend "BC" began writing me snippets of a high school AU.
Dec. 14
-Latias-chan watched him from across the hall, unable to do or say anything. She had a deep love for Zekrom-senpai, but would Latios onii-san ever allow it? Her heart pitter-pattered all the way.
Dec. 14
-"Latias-chan!" she heard someone calling from behind; it was Moltres-san, from the theater club. "What are you doing here, you baka? The classes are about to start!"
Flustered, Latias-chan hurriedly followed her childhood friend along - she didn't want to make Regigigas-sensei angry. Her love would need to wait..."
"I just realized that you posted those fanfics as respond to my saying I hate Legendary Pokemon High School AUs. I HATE YOU"
It was incredibly silly but I enjoyed it...then it just kept on happening.
Dec. 16
-They quickly reached their classroom, where the stern yet gentle Regigigas-sensei patiently counted the minutes for the start of the class. Blushing with embarassment, Latias-chan hurriedly joined her classmates. While waiting for the bell to ring, she looked around to see which of her friends were present: there was Raikou-kun, from Rippongai - he was such a yankee! Also there was one of the new transfer students, Dennis-kun - he was nice, but a little crazy. Another of her old friends was Regice-chan, Regigigas-sensei's daught--
*CRASH-BAMF*
"Kyaaaaaaa!"
"Naniiiiiii?!
"OMGGGGGGGG!!"
It all happened so suddenly. Without warning, a flash of light bursted overhead the class, and something - or things - fell from it, bringing great confusion to the students, who were unable to see under the cloud of dust. Slowly but surely, the cloud started to dissipate, and three different voices could be heard from within:
"Ow ow OW!What the hell did you do, you stupid frog?!"
"It's ya own fault for goin' after that thing without tellin' us. There's NO way ya didn't see me aimin' at it."
"The more you prolong this unnecessary discussion, the less we'll know about our situation. Now... where are we?"
Latias-chan's heart pitter-pattered all the way.
"-BUT WHO WAS DENNIS-KUN?!
-I think I recognize Faive but I don't know who the other are. :C
-Moltres-sanxLatias-chan dammit"
Dec. 18
-Soon enough, the dust cloud subsided, revealing the three mysteryous figures. Much to the students shock (and mixed reactions), the newcomers - a man and two women - unlike the fully-uniformized class, were completely nude. At least one of the girls (the wormy yellow one standing on an unconcious Sui-kun) had the decency to wear a shell.
"Ooh, now it's MY fault for trying to help you out? Thanks a lot for the camaderie" snapped the white-colored girl, who was bickering with the lanky purple lad. "Maybe the next time we fight a murder machine, I'll leave to handle it all yourself!"
"Ya just don' get it, do ya?!" continued the man, visibly aggravated. "I was goin' straight for a finishin' move, when ya showed up suddenly and made me hit the wrong spot. We didn' need to get caught by some crazy explosion and..."
The shelled woman appeared to medidate, while muttering to herself about "patience" and resisting the urge to punch the floor.
"Ah-hem. Excuse me..." Regigigas-sensei took a step forward, calling the attention of both visitors and students (who were busy shouting "What's going on?", "Kyaaaa! Hentai!", "Who are these guys?", amongst other lines). "I am Regigigas-sensei, and I welcome you to our school. Now, I believe some explanations are in order."
It took a moment for the three strangers to notice their surroundings; all around them, there were fully-dressed pokémon - and not just any pokémon...
"You... you are Regigigas?" asked the yellow one, surprised. "The one who knotted the continets together, and leader of the three golems? Just what is going on?"
"Pardon me?" asked Regigigas-sensei, confused.
"Wait a second... there's a whole freakin' pantheon here!" shouted the purple man, suddenly excited and pointing at students. "That one's Zapdos, the thunderbird! There's also Mesprit, avatar of emotions! And there's also this big, purple insectoid... thing... who the hell are ya?"
"I KILLED THE DINOSAURS!!" yelled Dennis-kun, much to everyone's aggrievance.
The white girl just stood where she was, both terrified by the presence of all these myths and titans, and also holding her laugher for how ridiculous they looked on those clothes.
That doesn't really answer any questions." Regigigas-sensei continued. "Now, if you could..."
The newcomers were his own characters and...well, pretty much everything is an inside joke. I thought that was the end of that. Then...
Jan 2
'Nobody asked, but here it is: because this couldn't be left unfinished.
-"Great Regigigas," said the yellow one, "we sincerely apologize for our intrusion in this sacred realm of the ancients." She was sternly kneeling down, as if in the presence of a king. Regigigas-sensei was still confused, and starting to feel uncomfortable.
"Sacred realm? Ancients?" He had no idea why that woman was treating him - and apparently, his students - with such reverence. "I think there must be some misunderstanding, miss... this is a school, not a temple. And we most certainly aren't "ancients" of any kind."
"SAYS YOU!!" shouted again Dennis-kun, to general miscontent.
"Ya know... I'm startin' to think there's somethin' different about this." said the purple lad to the kneeling lady. "Why the hell are all these legends wearin' clothes? And the bald guy doesn' sound very imponent or anythin'."
"Don't call him like that - be more respectful with the Regi king." she replied, with complete seriousness.
"But he just said that--"
"You two let me handle this" interrupted the white one, pushing them aside. "I think I have this figured out..." She approached Regigigas-sensei, and put on her most sugary expression.
"Ah, Sensei! We're soooooo sorry! But it was an accident--" she was interrupted by a punch to the face from Shaymin-san, the class president.
"Don't get close to sensei, you lecherous woman! Hentai!" she had a very conservative upbringing, and her outburst was slightly justified.
"Ooch... what was that for, you flowery prick?! I'm going to show you--"
"Don't you dare!!" shouted the yellow girl, with alarm. "It's inconceivable to try to fight with any of them!"
"If you haven't noticed, these guys AREN'T gods. Whatever stupid dimension or whatever we have ended on, it's obvious that they can't... oh wait, she just started absorbing the dust from the floor... oh, crap." The last thing the white girl saw before falling unconscious was Shaymin-san's fully-charged Seed Flare flying straight at her.
"You went a little too far, Shaymin-chan~" said her boyfriend, Celebi-kun. Not everyone liked him very much - he was prone to play some very inconvenient pranks with his abilities, and was very smug. "It's not like she knew how strong you were... oh, what's this?~" he noticed the lanky lad holding his arm like a cannon, and pointing to him and his girlfriend.
"Most of the time, she gets beaten like this after doin' somethin' nasty or stupid, so I let it pass" he seemed strangely serious. "But this time, she didn' get to do anythin' too bad, and you shot a freakin' explosion on her face."
"She was trying to s--"
"YA THINK I'LL LET YA BEAT MY COMRADES FOR NO GOOD REASON?!" he shot a Vacuum Wave from his hand, which Shaymin-san and Celebi-kun managed to dodge on time, only to pass through
Giratina-san and destroy a wall. Most of the students were confused and afraid, but a small group composed of Raikou-kun, Groudon-san, and Darkrai-chan approached him, visibly offended.
"Ya wanna fight, uh? There's Mach Fives for everyone, so bring it!" Suddenly, his face lightened up, as if he had a great revelation. "Oh yeah... I like where this is goin'. Stranded on another world, we pick a fight with its inhabitants. Durin' our long stay here, we will start to see the meanin' of our power, and how it is nothin' compared to our spirits. We will make friends, meet new places, and have battle after battle with the best fighters this world has to offer!" The group standing in front of him had no idea what that was about. "It will be a story of action! Emotion! Tears! Laugher! Romance!!" Latias-chan's heart pitter-pattered all the way. "This will be one of the greatest adventures ever written... and it will start now!!
So get ready to FACE THE WORL--"
"... and we need to return post haste. Can you help us, great professor Regigigas?" said the shelled girl.
"Oh, certainly" politely answered Regigigas-sensei. "Palkia-kun, could you do us this favor?"
"Leave it to me-kia!" said Palkia-kun, from the music club. He immediatly slashed at the air, and opened a translucent portal. "This should take you back to your home dimension-kia! But you will probably forget everything about ours-kia!"
"This is fine by me. I humbly thank you for your assistance, great professor Regigigas, and dimension lord Palkia." the shelled girl said, kneeling down once more.
"You're welcome-kia!" Palkia-kun said, before grabbing her and the other girl, and tossing them inside. The man had barely time to say "Hey, what's happenin' with my--" before being tossed as well, and the portal closed. At that moment, the school bell rang.
"Listen well, everyone: we will have a 10-minute dalay to fix the classroom." said Regigigas-sensei, as if that was a common situation. "And then we will start the classes. Understood?"
"Haaai." Most of the students answered.
"Celebi-chan? What's so funny?" asked Shaymin-chan, who noticed her boyfriend smirking.
"Oh, it's nothing~" he said, his smirk turning into a smug smile.
"I know that face... did you pull one of your pranks on one of them? Which one was it?" she asked, unsure whether to find this funny or worrying.
"Who knows~"
The next installment will wrap everything up. With a special warning at the beginning!"
Jan. 7
"...Now let's end this nonsense.
Carl sighed, still trying to understand how such a promising evening went downhill so quickly. Earlier that day, he had received a call from a foreign scientist of some renown - someone he had been trying to contact since the beginning of his brief visit to Sinnoh - greenlighting a visit to his summer house for an interview. The man, one Dr. Ludestein, wasn't half as famous as he was on his homeland, but some of his achievements on the study of evolution stones made him slightly well-known around the world. His most recent research involved the potential properties of the everstone, whose results would be made public in a few weeks; and Carl was ecstastic not only with the chance of getting a scoop ahead of most journalists - including Gabby from Hoenn - but also with the permission granted to take pictures of the prototype invention that resulted from these studies.
However, things went differently than he expected upon reaching the place; following the "advice" given by Reptile (who was just complaining about how hungry he was feeling at the moment), Carl decided to enter the house through the backdoor warehouse, since that was the place where the doctor would most likely be waiting for him. Instead, he triggered the security alarms, and was immediatly confronted by an enraged Ludestein. Without even caring to learn the identity of the trepasser, Carl was accused of being one of "Kaminko's dogs", who had come there to steal his "instrument of personal revenge". Before the reporter could have any idea what was going on, Ludestein unveiled and entered a reasonably big robotic machine, modeled after a white and draconic-looking pokémon; it was powered by a proportionally enormous everstone, located quite visibly on the mecha's head. Carl had barely enough time to call out his entire team before being attacked.
It was an arduous and (quite frankly) ridiculous battle, and despite outnumbering him considerably, the seven pokémon (and trainer) were barely able to defeat the doctor and his machine. Uderzo had been the great hero of the night, taking a critical attack on his shell for the team, and still managing to gather his strengh to deliver the finishing blow after three of his teammates weakened the mecha by (apparently) attacking the everstone directly. While he was well aware of the merits for defeating what was, by all accounts, a robo-tank, Carl still knew that this visit had been a complete waste of time; the interviewee tried to kill him, the invention was destroyed, the whole story went kaput, and one of his pokémon, while alive, had been gravely injured. And he had another immediate pressing concern - the small explosion caused by the everstone, and his three pokémon caught in the blast.
The smoke cloud hadn't subsided, but Carl and the other pokémon (sans Uderzo, who was eating as usual) were relieved to see Erza walking out from it, pulling an unconscious Rukina with her; the latter was knocked out, but didn't seem to be seriously hurt, while the former just looked tired. However, Faive was still nowhere to be seen...
"Girls! Man, thank goodness you are fine... well, sort of. Come back, Rukina..." Carl said, approaching them and recalling the froslass back to her pokéball. "There's still Faive left, though... let's wait this smoke clear out." Candide looked worried about Rukina's state, but he knew she had went through worse.
["For..."] said Erza, directing herself to her teammates. ["... for how long were we out?"]
["The stone exploded ten seconds ago, so... yes, I guess it was this much!"] said York, still happy to see the two of them were relatively ok. ["Are you feeling well, Erza?"]
["I suppose... this must have been a shock for my senses."] she answered, still feeling a bit dizzy. ["But I will be fine. Thank you for the concern."]
["Munch*munch*"] Uderzo nodded, still eating like there wasn't a horrific crack on his shell.
"I'm done for... do as you please." the group was surprised by an unexpected voice - it was Dr. Ludestein, hanging in defeat from the machine's cockpit. "Go, humiliate me as he would!!"
"Doctor..." Carl was unsure what to do. The man had attacked him just moments ago, and he was still waiting for the smoke to subside to look for his missing toxicroak... on the other hand, now he looked sufficiently harmless (and most importantly, sane). "... WHAT are you talking about?! And why did you attack us in the first place?"
"Don't try to play fool with me!" he said, still keeping some of his anger. "Why else would you try to enter my home through the backdoor, other than try to sabotage my weapon against your employer?"
"What in..." Carl didn't understand everything, but now he knew enough. "... look, doctor. I'm not working for anybody, and I had no idea you had your invention here. My pokémon thought you would be waiting us here, and... I guess it was a misunderstanding. Sorry!"
"One moment. You say I was waiting for you?" the doctor asked. "So that means..."
"Yeah, I'm that journalist you called." Carl was happy to see he was willing to listen now.
"Carl Paiva, freelance reporter - at your service! ... it's a little late for that now, I guess."
"Now that I think about it, if that wretched Kaminko were to sent anyone to do his bidding, it would be that midget... wait, so I..." Ludestein steadly bacame aware of the situation. "... good Arceus, I did a mistake."
"Doctor, you don't need to worry about this..." Carl was feeling a little sorry for him. "I mean, I was by all intents trepassing your property! This was just a misun--"
"How should I not worry?! Look what I've done!!" Ludestein was furious again, this time with himself. "One of my best everstones, blown to bits! My precious Robo-Reshiram, destroyed beyond repair! Your torterra--" he pointed at Uderzo, still eating and not caring about his exposed backside. "--look at it!!"
"Ok, so I agree Uderzo didn't need to get his shell cracked open..." the reporter did agree with the scientist, but didn't want to be blunt about it. "But it's not like you didn't do anything unforgivable, right?"
["*COUGH* What the hell is up with all this smoke?!"] All in the warehouse, human and pokémon alike, got their attention directed to the dissipating cloud, and the voice that came from it.
["Did we beat that thing? Erza? *COUGH* Rukina? Where the hell are ya?"] With small steps,
Faive walked to a clearer space to meet his comrades and opponent. ["There ya are! Looks like we got the job done"] he said, admiring the wrecked machine. Erza was confused, York surprised.
["Heh. As dumb as that manuever was, it looks like Rukina did get a shot helpin' us brin' this thing down - ya gotta respect that!"] Candide started to stutter, Uderzo dropped the food from his mouth - and started to feel a bit of pain. ["Where is she, anyway? Don' tell me that explosion... why are ya lookin' at me like that?"]
"Don't tell me... the everstone!!" Ludestein banged his head against the Robo-Reshiram's control panel, Carl stared focusedly at Faive, trying to see something.
"Hum... why is that croagunk wearing Faive's focus sash?"
["Huh?"]
Reptile was unable to react - all he could think of was how glad he was for not having evolved yet AND being on Faive's place.
EPILOGUE (not exactly, but whatever - [ http://homestuck.bandcamp.com/track/wacky-antics ] )
-For all his trouble, Carl actually managed to write the story he was there for, with pictures and everything - since Ludestein's invention for the public obviously wasn't the Robo-Reshiram.
Instead, it was a collar for the practical accomodation of everstones, leaving space for a second hold item - not exactly ground-breaking news.
For promising to stay quiet about this incident (as well as an apology for what happened with Uderzo and Faive), Ludestein gave Carl an entire box of everstones, and a rare(?) TM from his homeland. Carl kept the TM and sold the everstones, but he'd rather have his payment doubled. "All in a work's day, I guess."
-Faive did indeed devolve into a croagunk. After a through analisis, Ludestein confirmed that this wasn't a permanent change - with enough battles, he should gather enough experience to evolve again into a toxicroak. However, there's no telling when this will happen... and while Faive couldn't care less how he looks, Carl interpreted his enthusiastic declarations as a cry for help - and vowed to help him evolve as soon as possible. "Short and weaker? This doesn't change who I am! If you don' get this, get ready to open that door, and FACE THE WORLD!!"
-After a good night's rest, Erza regained her full strengh. She still trains, waiting for the day she will have to give her all for a good cause. "I have to be prepared - no, I WILL be."
-Rukina soon recovered, and had a good laugh with Faive's devolution. She eventually found out who that robot was based on, and added this to her feud against fire type pokémon. "You're not allowed to do anything without an adult's supervision, ok? KYAHAHAHAHA!... meh, it's not funny if you don't care."
-Dr. Ludestein's invention had modest sales in Sinnoh, and he eventually returned to his home in Unova. Re-thinking his actions, he decided it was stupid to hold a grudge against the Orre scientist for breaking his science project back in the third grade. "Humph... at least Robo-Zekrom will be something that will benefit mankind."
-Uderzo had to go through intensive care to treat his broken shell. He is walking and not feeling pain, but the injury will keep him out of battles for an indeterminate time. "Munch*munch*chomp. Ahem."
-Absolutely nothing happened with Candide. His feelings for Rukina are still transparent. "To regress to a previous evolutionary state... this backwards, antithesis to progress, what impact should it have on one's perception of his place in the world? The loss of power and mass is something that gives a new perspective to the act of being... is it positive and beneficial? To evolve or not devolve? How should we feel about the prospect of returning to ones roots?! And..."
-York started working with Carl's mom at Mauville's Post Office, and will stay out of battles for a while as well - Carl is currently deciding who will fill his spot on the team. He's still pretty much the same. "Bye, father! I'll go to Solaceon as often as I can, so see you soon!"
-Reptile filled Uderzo's spot on the team, and is happy to be "officially" back in action. He's still a treecko, and peeved about it. "Note to self: stay as far away as possible from everstones."
-Dana wasn't introduced yet, so let's leave it at that. "What? Isn't it my turn now? Ooh, I hope this doesn't take too long..."
-Latias-chan, after many humorous and dramatic misadventures, eventually found her true love with Moltres-kun. "Latios-oniisan still doesn't approve, but who cares about what that baka thinks? *pitter*patter*pitter*patter*"
-Regigigas-sensei was eventually promoted to an administrative position at Rejenderi Gakkou. He does a wonderful job. "And this is how we should deal with inter-dimensional visiting expenses."
-Celebi-kun is still a smug jerk. "Oh, my~"
-Palkia-kun's play won the school's club tournament. He's ecstastic. "Great job, everyone-kia! BANZAI-kia!!"
-Our most esteemed Brazillian Critic is still angry we just allowed one forword from him. "Here's two more: f*** you."
THE END"
I hadn't known my bro BC, for a long but his current writing level is leap and bounds better than when I first knew him, especially the last part. I felt so proud of him, even if everything was half-sill. :') That and the fact that he 'ended' the series with my OTP4eva. AHAHAHAHAHAH. He did add one last thing.
Jan. 15
"After graduation, Dennis-kun became a history teacher at Rejenderi Gakkou. The students hate him. "THE ROMAN EMPIRE FELL TO MY HANDS!!"
Joaquin Walters has no idea these events ever happened, and likely never will. He's still bitter about some stuff in his life. "Madam, I refuse to pay 600p for a bottle of milk."
[The author] made some instant noodles after finishing this. "Upon retrospect, I put way too much effort into this."
xD He isn't especially prone to making silly things and certainly not writing fics when he has so many going on with his life. The fact that he did, even out of some weird sense of obligation, put a huge smile on my face. Man, why am I so sappy. It's all just a big joke.
And so, of course, I had to make some fanart.
If you can't tell any of the characters, that's okay. I can't draw either.
Gen V countdown. I think the current count is six down, five to go? (My best wishes to you, Mat!) Bonus Dennis-kun gijinka because he is the best and I love him.
I honestly thought Dennis-kun was some weirdo human conspiracy nut thrown in to contrast with all the other students at REJENDERI GAKKOU.
I think he was disappointed that I haven't caught on yet and finally flat out told me that Dennis was that Bug Legendary Pokemon... And then I accidentally spoilered B&W events for both of us. OH WELL.
Speaking of love and weird pairings.
I pretty much lost it at 'snow angels'.
Blah. Damn love calculators. I'm having trouble channeling Law Hero but that's another journal for...whenever.