life happens..
so..i never update this crap..but i figured i'd do this for those of you (lindsay..megan) that i haven't updated in awhile..and can't seem to answer my phone to(we love phone tag)..so..here's the story and i don't really wanna talk about it again so here it goes..i seem to write in here when there's a major something in my life..so for all of you that know me..it's over between me and him..you know who i'm talking about if i want you to..all of you guys that consoled me, advised me, tried to open my eyes, or just went along with what i said cause you hoped i would snap out of it..thanks..but basically..he let me down..big time..i had been iffy about things for like 2 weeks, but he told me i was being paranoid..he told me he loved me as usual, wanted noone else, and that there was noone else..well i have the best friends ever..i was texting him one night after we went out..and he said he was asleep..the boy never ever turned me down when either one of us had been out..so instinct told me he was lying..well i was convinced to go find out..keep in mind i neeeeeever would have done this on my own..so we go in..open his door..and there he is..in bed (not doing anything..yet) with another girl..like wtf?! yeah buddy..that's love..it's completely embarassing in a way..i always stuck up for him when my friends doubted him..but at least i know i did nothing wrong to end it..so a year and a half of wishful thinking that he'd grow up and i find that out? honestly people i was amazed by him when i first met him..and you all know that..but who with the morals i swore he had would do that? all i ever asked was honesty..i just can't believe who it seems he's become..if he would have told me he wanted to see other people..cool whatever..i wasn't his girlfriend well as he put it "for all intensive purposes i was" but whatever..i knew why i wasn't..in any case, we had made it perfectly clear we wouldn't do anything with anyone else..at least it would have been amicable and honest to be straightforward..he wanted his cake and to eat it too obviously cause he hadn't bothered to say anything when i was there the night before entertaining him..idiot..apparently he's already started this new girl off in a lie and she seems nice so hopefully she isn't as clueless as i was..i know she thinks we're all mental ( i would)..but she'll never know the real deal..i guess my mom was right when she said there was something she didn't like about him..it's just stupid..i can see him standing there wooing my mom at home..and his mom walking in on us and feeling so weird about it..i guess it was nice for awhile..it just gives me all these doubts about guys..i mean i knew a lot sucked..but i almost believed some could be diiferent..there will be more..i just hope i see their true colors sooner next time..thank you guys for always being there:)