Offline snark
I just got the following email from one of the yarn stores in my town...
Hi Knitters,
You must come in this week and let us show you how to do the Surprise Scarf. It is so amazing.
You knit one third of your scarf and then, Surprise, when you bind off, you let every other stitch ladder down to make the scarf 2/3rds longer. You can make about 10 scarves a day with this technique without using super big needles.
Also new to Yarniverse are ready to wear Orenberg lace shawls for sale. These are imported from Russia , and are just exquisite. They are for sale for $60 a piece. Each one is unique and a work of art. They are perfect for summer- very, very light, but provide warmth in air conditioned spaces.
Hope to see you this week. Ask one of us to show you how to do the Surprise Scarf.
I'm not even sure where/how to begin the snarking. Are they trying to market to the non-knitters? I mean, I think you have to buy something there to get on their email list. That would generally imply that you know how to knit. So why drop $60 on a rtw shawl when I could make one? Then I'd have a "unique...work of art" made by ME!
Then, there is the "amazing" surprise scarf - this seems just as talentless as never progressing past garter stitch scarves on size 19 needles with extra bulky yarn. It might be just me, but I don't want to make 10 crappy laddered scarves a day. I'd rather make a semi intricate pretty scarf in week or so.
And the "ask one of us to show you" part - I can't ever get one of them to ring up a purchase, so I'm not holding my breath that they would ever actually be bothered to show me how to do something! Every time I've been into that particular store, the employees are too busy talking amongst themselves to offer any help.