oh my, where have the days gone?

[knit_me_a_heart]

so it's been a while. again. i just don't get online enough to really do anything.

some things have changed.

for those of you who don't know already, i had two HUGE lumps removed from the same areas as before.

making this three surgeries too many.

today i start radiation, i am headed there when i leave the library.

(i also found another lump behind my ear where one that was just removed was. bad news.)

i love spending time with my family. and my friends. but being in a relationship right now is so hard. i feel pressured to be someone and something all the time, and most days, i just want to be left be. but he doesn't get it. and i don't know how to explain it.

i would like to go on a vacation soon. maybe this summer, but i don't know where. somewhere cheap. but i need to get away. every day i think about getting in my car and driving away, but then i remember the piece of shit i drive, and realize i won't get very far.

so i just have to wait.

::hugs::