what I learned today
the last 48 hours could be forgettable.
Brandy needs to be heard. Period. She's never had that and she needs it ever so desperately.
I don't mind personally, it makes my job easier if I get to listen to her direction. She just needs to be unafraid, I need to convince her that I wont ever snap her head off... Although, when I'm making decisions and taking charge, she does speak up more frequently... When you ask her on demand, she turtles up and hides.
Things could be a whole lot worse:
Sure, things get turbulent, its a part of the process, a relationship... but when someone or something activity RIPS your happiness away from you, that's True Peril.
Theres nothing more brutal to witness than watching a grown Man, a son, Broken, in tears. NOTHING, PERIOD, END OF STORY.
Watching a Son systematically come to terms of saying goodbye to his best friend and the one that raise him is absolutely agonizing.
I heard of the news and I ran to his side... I am hurting myself, with my own problems and issues, even though I knew it didn't compare. I was hell-bent to ensure Quinn that he was not alone during this time of need.
I provided breakfast, coffee runs.. I stood there, and then sat at his feet, begging him and to anyone willing to listen, to trade my worries and stress with his... I'd rather stand in his place and he feel the measures of my stress upon his body. Quinn is a good man, he's a damn good man... years ago he was uncontrollable, a loose cannon without direction.
I've been through the gutter, the shitter, the emotional "fuck you, you'll never be happy, ever period." moments in life, Quinn hasn't.
I'll stand in front of any storm for anyone I care about, period. I learned it from my father, he took all the blame, all the pain, all the torment, because he knew he was protecting the ones that he loved the most and it was worth it all.
Take my beaten down heart, I try so hard to make something out of it... its the most broken and abused part of my body... Quinn doesn't deserve this, he's not prepared, his heart is glass against my mudhole stomped black hole.
For Two days, he sat, unyielding in hope and prayer... staying put on a chair he transplanted as home, because home is where your heart is... and no one has ever held Quinn's heart like his own mother.
I'd wake early, honestly I couldn't sleep with the issues I was enduring, then I'd tell myself, "No, time fixes everything." Brandy will come back, loving, caring and wonderful, knowing that she's got a great guy by her side.
I love Brandy
I know She's not perfect, she makes mistakes like everyone else, but I did the worst mistake of all... She kissed me first and I never kissed her back, I let her go. Decisions for a troubled soul is much harder than a grounded one... I understand, I've been there
I know Brandy would never allow herself to do an action that would inflict the pain that Quinn experienced upon me. She's a high quality person, I know that, I've seen it, I've felt it, and I've experienced it. She makes me proud and she is so compassionate and cooperative that you could never get truly mad at her.
Many people would disagree with actions, but Brandy is the only girl I've ever been proud of... I want to say that again, THE ONLY GIRL I'VE EVER BEEN PROUD OF. If there's anyone that could make this better, its fucking Brandy Montgomery Rogers. She's the strongest, Toughest woman I know, I tease her all the time, but truly, she is, and I'm so proud of her for all of her amazing qualities.
An individuals outstanding qualities to me will always out weigh a stupid decision or mistake. Its called having faith in someone and never giving up on them, giving them an opportunity to grow as a person with you, instead of simply walking away from something that could be so special because of one stupid action, when they were in a dark spot, a terrible mindset of fear, and she let her fear take over everything to try and ruin it.
I'm not afraid of Fear, fear and stress can go fuck off and die.
She can say anything she wants, she can trap herself into these terrible moods or ditches. I'll still stand by her side, I've seen the best qualities of her... its worth it, she's worth it whether she wants to believe it or listen to me.
Time to slow down.
Brandy needs to be heard. Period. She's never had that and she needs it ever so desperately.
I don't mind personally, it makes my job easier if I get to listen to her direction. She just needs to be unafraid, I need to convince her that I wont ever snap her head off... Although, when I'm making decisions and taking charge, she does speak up more frequently... When you ask her on demand, she turtles up and hides.
Things could be a whole lot worse:
Sure, things get turbulent, its a part of the process, a relationship... but when someone or something activity RIPS your happiness away from you, that's True Peril.
Theres nothing more brutal to witness than watching a grown Man, a son, Broken, in tears. NOTHING, PERIOD, END OF STORY.
Watching a Son systematically come to terms of saying goodbye to his best friend and the one that raise him is absolutely agonizing.
I heard of the news and I ran to his side... I am hurting myself, with my own problems and issues, even though I knew it didn't compare. I was hell-bent to ensure Quinn that he was not alone during this time of need.
I provided breakfast, coffee runs.. I stood there, and then sat at his feet, begging him and to anyone willing to listen, to trade my worries and stress with his... I'd rather stand in his place and he feel the measures of my stress upon his body. Quinn is a good man, he's a damn good man... years ago he was uncontrollable, a loose cannon without direction.
I've been through the gutter, the shitter, the emotional "fuck you, you'll never be happy, ever period." moments in life, Quinn hasn't.
I'll stand in front of any storm for anyone I care about, period. I learned it from my father, he took all the blame, all the pain, all the torment, because he knew he was protecting the ones that he loved the most and it was worth it all.
Take my beaten down heart, I try so hard to make something out of it... its the most broken and abused part of my body... Quinn doesn't deserve this, he's not prepared, his heart is glass against my mudhole stomped black hole.
For Two days, he sat, unyielding in hope and prayer... staying put on a chair he transplanted as home, because home is where your heart is... and no one has ever held Quinn's heart like his own mother.
I'd wake early, honestly I couldn't sleep with the issues I was enduring, then I'd tell myself, "No, time fixes everything." Brandy will come back, loving, caring and wonderful, knowing that she's got a great guy by her side.
I love Brandy
I know She's not perfect, she makes mistakes like everyone else, but I did the worst mistake of all... She kissed me first and I never kissed her back, I let her go. Decisions for a troubled soul is much harder than a grounded one... I understand, I've been there
I know Brandy would never allow herself to do an action that would inflict the pain that Quinn experienced upon me. She's a high quality person, I know that, I've seen it, I've felt it, and I've experienced it. She makes me proud and she is so compassionate and cooperative that you could never get truly mad at her.
Many people would disagree with actions, but Brandy is the only girl I've ever been proud of... I want to say that again, THE ONLY GIRL I'VE EVER BEEN PROUD OF. If there's anyone that could make this better, its fucking Brandy Montgomery Rogers. She's the strongest, Toughest woman I know, I tease her all the time, but truly, she is, and I'm so proud of her for all of her amazing qualities.
An individuals outstanding qualities to me will always out weigh a stupid decision or mistake. Its called having faith in someone and never giving up on them, giving them an opportunity to grow as a person with you, instead of simply walking away from something that could be so special because of one stupid action, when they were in a dark spot, a terrible mindset of fear, and she let her fear take over everything to try and ruin it.
I'm not afraid of Fear, fear and stress can go fuck off and die.
She can say anything she wants, she can trap herself into these terrible moods or ditches. I'll still stand by her side, I've seen the best qualities of her... its worth it, she's worth it whether she wants to believe it or listen to me.
Time to slow down.