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What are Suzaku's thoughts on being Lulu's knight vs being Euphie's?
Okay, so Zazzle asked me this, and I think it’s a good thing to look at. Before I go into the “versus” aspect of it, I think I should look at the aspect of being their knights individually. I think it’s important to see how he sees himself as their knights before going on into the other aspects of it. I doubt this will be a very long essay, but at least I’ll have it written down somewhere.
Being Euphemia’s Knight
One of the most significant things about being Euphie’s knight is that he didn’t seek the position. Yes, he sought to help others and prove himself to the military and otherwise, but he didn’t strive for it, not in the same way he sought the position as a Knight of Rounds, or even how he ended up as Lelouch’s knight. At the time, he only knew he had the machine that would provide him with the strength to help other people, and it was a bit of a surprise that it was announced that he would be Euphemia’s knight. We do know that Suzaku sought to change things from the inside, and some part of him wished to rise up through the military, but the cold, calculating side of him hadn’t come out yet.
If anything, the arrangement was pure. On top of that, Euphemia was wonderful, someone he caught and learned the viewpoints of, and someone who wished to get to know him despite the fact that she was a princess. In every way possible, Euphemia tops him, even if she’s impulsive and does things her way, it’s a given that he would do anything for her. Losing her literally broke him, because while he had his suspicions against Lelouch along the way, and he was being treated poorly within the Britannian side of things (Lloyd and Cecile aside), Euphemia always respected him and believed in his abilities, even pushing others to give him the chance to come in as the great hero in the white knightmare.
Gaining her trust, confidence, and love were all things he never expected, but in a way, it raised him up and made him that little bit more optimistic (while he would play things off-look at the scene when they’re discussing people coming to the SAZ, it seems, to me, like he’s trying to exclude himself from the situation, like no one would come out for him and would only be happy to be there with the princess). He has crippling insecurities, he hates himself, he feels guilty, and he tries to align himself with justice and honor and rules, because of the mistakes he’s made in the past to change things and make them better. He did it wrong, and no one punished him for it, while passing it off as suicide.
Aside from the obvious connotations of love, I don’t think Suzaku wanted much more than to be Euphie’s knight when he became her knight. He would not think to push her, and the biggest thing about being her knight was that he served her. I do not think he saw himself as her confidant. That is how Guilford is undoubtedly related to Cornelia, but with Suzaku and Euphemia, her opinion, however naïve or idealistic it happened to be at times, would reign supreme. He was aiming to prove himself, but also protect her. He was her knight, and he would do anything possible, even if he didn’t feel he deserved the position.
To bullet point it a bit more concisely:
• Suzaku was less cold and calculating about the position. I think he would have been content in being her knight. Only her knight, while she changed the world in her own, wonderful way. He believed in that, I think, and would have been content with her decisions.
• I don’t think Suzaku thought he deserved to be her knight.
• He would have been okay with serving Euphemia and would not have aimed higher. If anything, he was working on proving himself at that point, because many believed he would easily and readily betray people, and that the only reason he was her knight was because she was romantically fond of him. No one clapped for him, and he did not falter in expression. If anything, I figure Suzaku probably thought he deserved no applause.
• Protecting her was always number one, in the most naïve way possible. He wanted to protect her, just as he wanted to save everyone (going back to save someone randomly in the middle of a battle, for example). He joined the military to save lives-it was figured in as a factor of his instability, because he definitely was figured as unstable.
Being Lelouch’s Knight
I think a lot of the above is pretty clearly stated in canon, and therefore fairly obvious. I admit a lot of this is my interpretation of their relationship after they learn about the world of C, and come together in order to work as the Emperor and his Knight of Zero. Prior to the transition there, Suzaku tells Lelouch that he should kill him, because he killed Euphie, but I assume it stopped because Suzaku is different. If he killed Lelouch there, he would not be able to activate the changes in the world that he always held on to. Even if his motivations changed (slightly), he still wanted that. In R2, Suzaku is colder and more calculating, and while he says he would like to work within the guidelines of rules, it’s obvious that he is not someone who is willing to do it passively. He drags Lelouch back to Charles, he becomes a really active role in the Knight of Rounds and in Area 11, and he informs Lelouch that he has every intention of becoming Knight of One and taking Japan back. But this is active, versus his passive role in the first season-then, he is more than desperate to prove himself than anything, while saving lives. In a way, his focus shifts from saving people and proving that he’s worthy, to a larger, more overarching one.
He’s cold, he’s desperate, and he’s broken.
The biggest thing about being Lelouch’s knight is that he’s more incisive and he feels that he deserves to be his knight. Lelouch is not someone he sees above him, but rather as his equal, for all the sins he did. In order to reach this point, he kills millions of people, and he breaks his resolve, his beliefs, and converts to a different belief system, one of “any means necessary.” This was the same one that Lelouch employed, in some way, even if Suzaku didn’t realize it. Suzaku was blind to it, and I don’t think he’s fully realized how well their points of view were meant to align the entire time, as Suzaku was always headed down the path of “any means necessary,” by believing he would change things from the inside. That’s a means, after all.
I think, also, in becoming Lelouch’s knight, he needed to justify it to himself as being okay. One: Lelouch needed someone strong enough to carry out anything necessary, as Lelouch was surprisingly unable to do so himself. He would get caught up in Nunnally, in weaknesses, and Suzaku told himself and believed he was nothing more than a sword to wield. C.C. would protect Lelouch from the onslaught. The second thing was that he would be able to kill Lelouch when it was over. This was very necessary. “You will be able to kill me, as promised.” And while Suzaku asks him, is he absolutely certain he wants this, I do not think he would have been able to go through taking down almost all the Knights of Rounds on his own, as well as actually killing Lelouch, unless he held on to the belief that this was something that he wanted.
Furthermore, I believe Suzaku understood that Zero’s Requiem required both of them. Lelouch was the heart and the brain, while Suzaku was the arms and lengths of the operation. They are two individuals who are meant to work together, with their ability to see things through when they put their minds to it. Suzaku is meant to be Lelouch’s knight. Not Kallen, not Rolo, not anyone else. I do not think the plan would have succeeded if it was someone else. Suzaku understood Lelouch, either both consciously and subconsciously, and it was a key and significant part of his approach to being his knight.
After all, in being that, in being the one who would be the sword, he would be able to keep Lelouch in line and understand his intentions. C.C. could browbeat him, but not in the same, cold and desperate way that Lelouch would. Suzaku was Lelouch’s confidant, and while they kept up appearances of being head knight and Emperor, I really, truly do believe they were in on it together, with the understanding that we cannot do this without one another. It was not about protecting Lelouch or being on the defense, but being on the offense.
The end of everything did not end in the way that I think Suzaku would have liked. He took Zero’s sins upon himself, but not his own. I think Suzaku would have preferred to be long-suffering and punished for being Kururugi Suzaku, but by dying, he would take that tombstone. There are many ways he was punished, by having to live as an observer in a world but never truly belonging in it, along with the additional things mentioned when he and Lelouch do speak to one another. But it was everyone’s wish to have a hero, a symbol, in Zero, and therefore, Suzaku accepted it.
There really isn’t a concise, bullet-points way of putting this, so … yes.
The Versus Aspect
I think, reading those two things, it’s fairly obvious.
With Euphie, Suzaku wishes to protect her and even after everything, he does not think he deserves to be her knight. If she wishes to be with someone else instead of him, to have another knight (or even C.C.) to protect her, he will understand. I don’t think he would let up so easily, but he would take the order because it would be different. He has never thought he deserved Euphie, and he has always thought that her opinions, viewpoints, and so forth mattered over his. Only now he’s in a position to challenge it more in Micro.
With Lelouch, they are equals, and his position becomes more offensive, and less as if he is serving Lelouch. Any implication that he doesn’t belong there is hurtful, though, because of what happened in their final moments. They reached that point together, and it’s always been understood, whether they like it or not, that they would get there. He is supposed to be Lelouch’s sword, and Lelouch will not be as strong without him. There’s an entitlement there, but it’s justified.
Okay, so Zazzle asked me this, and I think it’s a good thing to look at. Before I go into the “versus” aspect of it, I think I should look at the aspect of being their knights individually. I think it’s important to see how he sees himself as their knights before going on into the other aspects of it. I doubt this will be a very long essay, but at least I’ll have it written down somewhere.
Being Euphemia’s Knight
One of the most significant things about being Euphie’s knight is that he didn’t seek the position. Yes, he sought to help others and prove himself to the military and otherwise, but he didn’t strive for it, not in the same way he sought the position as a Knight of Rounds, or even how he ended up as Lelouch’s knight. At the time, he only knew he had the machine that would provide him with the strength to help other people, and it was a bit of a surprise that it was announced that he would be Euphemia’s knight. We do know that Suzaku sought to change things from the inside, and some part of him wished to rise up through the military, but the cold, calculating side of him hadn’t come out yet.
If anything, the arrangement was pure. On top of that, Euphemia was wonderful, someone he caught and learned the viewpoints of, and someone who wished to get to know him despite the fact that she was a princess. In every way possible, Euphemia tops him, even if she’s impulsive and does things her way, it’s a given that he would do anything for her. Losing her literally broke him, because while he had his suspicions against Lelouch along the way, and he was being treated poorly within the Britannian side of things (Lloyd and Cecile aside), Euphemia always respected him and believed in his abilities, even pushing others to give him the chance to come in as the great hero in the white knightmare.
Gaining her trust, confidence, and love were all things he never expected, but in a way, it raised him up and made him that little bit more optimistic (while he would play things off-look at the scene when they’re discussing people coming to the SAZ, it seems, to me, like he’s trying to exclude himself from the situation, like no one would come out for him and would only be happy to be there with the princess). He has crippling insecurities, he hates himself, he feels guilty, and he tries to align himself with justice and honor and rules, because of the mistakes he’s made in the past to change things and make them better. He did it wrong, and no one punished him for it, while passing it off as suicide.
Aside from the obvious connotations of love, I don’t think Suzaku wanted much more than to be Euphie’s knight when he became her knight. He would not think to push her, and the biggest thing about being her knight was that he served her. I do not think he saw himself as her confidant. That is how Guilford is undoubtedly related to Cornelia, but with Suzaku and Euphemia, her opinion, however naïve or idealistic it happened to be at times, would reign supreme. He was aiming to prove himself, but also protect her. He was her knight, and he would do anything possible, even if he didn’t feel he deserved the position.
To bullet point it a bit more concisely:
• Suzaku was less cold and calculating about the position. I think he would have been content in being her knight. Only her knight, while she changed the world in her own, wonderful way. He believed in that, I think, and would have been content with her decisions.
• I don’t think Suzaku thought he deserved to be her knight.
• He would have been okay with serving Euphemia and would not have aimed higher. If anything, he was working on proving himself at that point, because many believed he would easily and readily betray people, and that the only reason he was her knight was because she was romantically fond of him. No one clapped for him, and he did not falter in expression. If anything, I figure Suzaku probably thought he deserved no applause.
• Protecting her was always number one, in the most naïve way possible. He wanted to protect her, just as he wanted to save everyone (going back to save someone randomly in the middle of a battle, for example). He joined the military to save lives-it was figured in as a factor of his instability, because he definitely was figured as unstable.
Being Lelouch’s Knight
I think a lot of the above is pretty clearly stated in canon, and therefore fairly obvious. I admit a lot of this is my interpretation of their relationship after they learn about the world of C, and come together in order to work as the Emperor and his Knight of Zero. Prior to the transition there, Suzaku tells Lelouch that he should kill him, because he killed Euphie, but I assume it stopped because Suzaku is different. If he killed Lelouch there, he would not be able to activate the changes in the world that he always held on to. Even if his motivations changed (slightly), he still wanted that. In R2, Suzaku is colder and more calculating, and while he says he would like to work within the guidelines of rules, it’s obvious that he is not someone who is willing to do it passively. He drags Lelouch back to Charles, he becomes a really active role in the Knight of Rounds and in Area 11, and he informs Lelouch that he has every intention of becoming Knight of One and taking Japan back. But this is active, versus his passive role in the first season-then, he is more than desperate to prove himself than anything, while saving lives. In a way, his focus shifts from saving people and proving that he’s worthy, to a larger, more overarching one.
He’s cold, he’s desperate, and he’s broken.
The biggest thing about being Lelouch’s knight is that he’s more incisive and he feels that he deserves to be his knight. Lelouch is not someone he sees above him, but rather as his equal, for all the sins he did. In order to reach this point, he kills millions of people, and he breaks his resolve, his beliefs, and converts to a different belief system, one of “any means necessary.” This was the same one that Lelouch employed, in some way, even if Suzaku didn’t realize it. Suzaku was blind to it, and I don’t think he’s fully realized how well their points of view were meant to align the entire time, as Suzaku was always headed down the path of “any means necessary,” by believing he would change things from the inside. That’s a means, after all.
I think, also, in becoming Lelouch’s knight, he needed to justify it to himself as being okay. One: Lelouch needed someone strong enough to carry out anything necessary, as Lelouch was surprisingly unable to do so himself. He would get caught up in Nunnally, in weaknesses, and Suzaku told himself and believed he was nothing more than a sword to wield. C.C. would protect Lelouch from the onslaught. The second thing was that he would be able to kill Lelouch when it was over. This was very necessary. “You will be able to kill me, as promised.” And while Suzaku asks him, is he absolutely certain he wants this, I do not think he would have been able to go through taking down almost all the Knights of Rounds on his own, as well as actually killing Lelouch, unless he held on to the belief that this was something that he wanted.
Furthermore, I believe Suzaku understood that Zero’s Requiem required both of them. Lelouch was the heart and the brain, while Suzaku was the arms and lengths of the operation. They are two individuals who are meant to work together, with their ability to see things through when they put their minds to it. Suzaku is meant to be Lelouch’s knight. Not Kallen, not Rolo, not anyone else. I do not think the plan would have succeeded if it was someone else. Suzaku understood Lelouch, either both consciously and subconsciously, and it was a key and significant part of his approach to being his knight.
After all, in being that, in being the one who would be the sword, he would be able to keep Lelouch in line and understand his intentions. C.C. could browbeat him, but not in the same, cold and desperate way that Lelouch would. Suzaku was Lelouch’s confidant, and while they kept up appearances of being head knight and Emperor, I really, truly do believe they were in on it together, with the understanding that we cannot do this without one another. It was not about protecting Lelouch or being on the defense, but being on the offense.
The end of everything did not end in the way that I think Suzaku would have liked. He took Zero’s sins upon himself, but not his own. I think Suzaku would have preferred to be long-suffering and punished for being Kururugi Suzaku, but by dying, he would take that tombstone. There are many ways he was punished, by having to live as an observer in a world but never truly belonging in it, along with the additional things mentioned when he and Lelouch do speak to one another. But it was everyone’s wish to have a hero, a symbol, in Zero, and therefore, Suzaku accepted it.
There really isn’t a concise, bullet-points way of putting this, so … yes.
The Versus Aspect
I think, reading those two things, it’s fairly obvious.
With Euphie, Suzaku wishes to protect her and even after everything, he does not think he deserves to be her knight. If she wishes to be with someone else instead of him, to have another knight (or even C.C.) to protect her, he will understand. I don’t think he would let up so easily, but he would take the order because it would be different. He has never thought he deserved Euphie, and he has always thought that her opinions, viewpoints, and so forth mattered over his. Only now he’s in a position to challenge it more in Micro.
With Lelouch, they are equals, and his position becomes more offensive, and less as if he is serving Lelouch. Any implication that he doesn’t belong there is hurtful, though, because of what happened in their final moments. They reached that point together, and it’s always been understood, whether they like it or not, that they would get there. He is supposed to be Lelouch’s sword, and Lelouch will not be as strong without him. There’s an entitlement there, but it’s justified.