Fourteeenth Summoning || Voice || With all these things that I've done

[knew_anyway]

[The feed clicks on, and there's nothing but soft breathing for a long moment, before John speaks slowly, painfully.]

...the blame for this event falls solely upon my shoulders. Miss Rei, for all of her involvement, was only following my instruction.

I- I'm sorry. I know that my words don't mean much now, but I'm sorry.

[His voice breaks.

Comments

[knew_anyway]

Of course.

[He takes a deep breath, unable to meet her eyes.]

In my own world, I am a summoner of considerable standing and power. Upon my arrival here, I saw the Animus as spirits and began investigating them. I learned rather quickly that the Animus were occupied with making the inhabitants here miserable, seemingly for their own amusement. And yet, there was something deeper- something that intrigued me with each conversation I had with them.

You know now that the Animus are composed of separate entities- I learned this several months ago and also noted that some entities were more whole than others. They had lost pieces of themselves, become lost and hurt and confused, and many of the events may well have been them lashing out in confusion and pain. I began to think that if I helped the Animus remember themselves, they might help us instead of mindlessly attacking us. It's with this intent that I summoned Aelia Laelia Crispis.

[A pause. It's painful from here on out.]

The summoning succeeded, and she proved to be a great wealth of information. She confirmed my beliefs that the Fire and Sword had forgotten its identity and scattered the other Animus with its confusion. I... I asked Aelia if the Animus would help us, if Ekpyrosis was allowed to remember his name, and she gave the impression that they were sympathetic to our cause.

Since the summoning of Aelia had gone perfectly by all of my standards- and I did include over twenty countercharms and protection clauses in the summoning-, I thought to discover the name of the Fire and call it out so that it may remember. You... you know the rest.

[He shakes his head.]

I didn't know this would happen. I was trying to- to help people. To help us. To help the Animus find themselves and find peace in this place. I didn't realize... I should have known, but I was too focused on trying to make this a safer place to live, that I didn't pay heed to my teachings- that spirits indeed are wicked creatures, and they will always hurt you if they can.

-I'm sorry.

[aquaticbeauty]

[Ami doesn't show any signs of disapproval nor understanding in the usual ways. She doesn't nod, her expression doesn't shift or contort in any way as the young man continues to tell his side of things.

It made sense. All of it did.

Ami wasn't sure if she should give him her opinion, though. She'd already tried to share her thoughts to several others as of late, and it usually back-fired.]

I...I can appreciate what you were trying to do. [She cast her eyes down, and brought a crooked finger to her chin thoughtfully.]

If anything could be learned from this, it's that we need to stop acting in factions, and be more unified. If not in action, at least in preparation. Would you agree with that assessment?

[knew_anyway]

You don't have to try to spare my feelings. I know that what I did was rash and illogical.

[But he nods after a moment.]

I can agree with that, but I no longer have any power to make it a reality. I will not attempt anything of this nature again while I am here, and I have no doubt that nobody will listen to me anymore.

[aquaticbeauty]

There will be those that listen. People will forgive. And if not, they'll eventually forget once they find someone else to be angrier at.

[knew_anyway]

I... appreciate it. Thank you.

[aquaticbeauty]

There's no need. I can only hope I'm not the only one to think through this logically.

[knew_anyway]

So far, it seems.

[A wry smile.]

But that's alright. I'm grateful for their anger, in a way.

[aquaticbeauty]

[Ami simply blinks.]

You feel you deserve it, and in a way are paying for your transgressions?

[knew_anyway]

More or less.

[aquaticbeauty]

I fear others may find that to be too merciful.

[knew_anyway]

I know it is. They'll find something else for me, I'm sure.