(no subject)
one day... my life will be the most depressing comedy ever recorded...
st. patty's day story - the most recent reason im happy i can laugh at myself-
on my way to log... driving through downtown, about 8:30... so of course all of down town is well-liquered-up. People stumbling from fiddlers etc. i pull up on the right side of a four door sedan, full of girls... drunk girls.
i glance over and make very brief eye contact with the girl sitting shotgun, she's singing whatever stupid drunk girl song is on the radio... probably the god-awful mash-up of a former ska-queen and some rap bastard who apparently lost both of his balls... anyways
i look back to the light not really thinking anything of the drunken car next to me... for some reason, known only to a higher power, i look back over and instantly make eye contact with shotgun girl. She "seductively" (drunk and kind of awkwardly) winks at me and produces a bottle of beer from somewhere on the floor of the car. She proceeds to place the bottle between her boobs, and while squeezing them together to keep the beer steady she uses her chin as a twister-offer and opens the beer. She takes a drink and winks again. Apparently thinking she just made my greatest dreams come true... my thinking is, alright, ill entertain her drunkeness, fuck with her a little bit. i grab an unopenned can of coke from the cup holder to my right. i viciously open said can with my teeth, thinking that this would be of equivalent exchange, come off looking a little rugged and then drive off into the night, leaving the girl to go "did you see that guy?".
Egomania, you say? well of course jackass, im andrew greulich.
Turns out i definitly had the girl turning to her friends to say that. Apparently this can had been aggressively shaken before finding it's way to my cup holder, instantly showering my face and the roof of my mother's suv with carmel flavored acid. Needless to say... i drove away into the night pretty fast... laughing harder than i think i ever have
st. patty's day story - the most recent reason im happy i can laugh at myself-
on my way to log... driving through downtown, about 8:30... so of course all of down town is well-liquered-up. People stumbling from fiddlers etc. i pull up on the right side of a four door sedan, full of girls... drunk girls.
i glance over and make very brief eye contact with the girl sitting shotgun, she's singing whatever stupid drunk girl song is on the radio... probably the god-awful mash-up of a former ska-queen and some rap bastard who apparently lost both of his balls... anyways
i look back to the light not really thinking anything of the drunken car next to me... for some reason, known only to a higher power, i look back over and instantly make eye contact with shotgun girl. She "seductively" (drunk and kind of awkwardly) winks at me and produces a bottle of beer from somewhere on the floor of the car. She proceeds to place the bottle between her boobs, and while squeezing them together to keep the beer steady she uses her chin as a twister-offer and opens the beer. She takes a drink and winks again. Apparently thinking she just made my greatest dreams come true... my thinking is, alright, ill entertain her drunkeness, fuck with her a little bit. i grab an unopenned can of coke from the cup holder to my right. i viciously open said can with my teeth, thinking that this would be of equivalent exchange, come off looking a little rugged and then drive off into the night, leaving the girl to go "did you see that guy?".
Egomania, you say? well of course jackass, im andrew greulich.
Turns out i definitly had the girl turning to her friends to say that. Apparently this can had been aggressively shaken before finding it's way to my cup holder, instantly showering my face and the roof of my mother's suv with carmel flavored acid. Needless to say... i drove away into the night pretty fast... laughing harder than i think i ever have