happy late birthday to alan
still no signs of this morbid depression lifting.
I yearn for simpler times with the knowledge that I can never go back.
I have a personal pet peeve for anyone who posts song lyrics in their journal, so I won't but suffice to say the song "minute of decay" has been on repeat in my mental soundtrack for a few days now.
Nothing is much fun anymore.
I can feel my age setting in. I don't care to talk about much anymore as there is no point. I don't care to express much anymore because no one cares/it's all futile. I don't feel like even feeling good anymore because it will innevitably be counter acted by something awefull.
I still feel like a zombie walking through my life, even when I look happy I don't feel it much anymore, not like i used to, and I can't unsee what has brought me to this point.
there's more to say, but I can't put it into anything coherant at the moment due to exhaustion.
I yearn for simpler times with the knowledge that I can never go back.
I have a personal pet peeve for anyone who posts song lyrics in their journal, so I won't but suffice to say the song "minute of decay" has been on repeat in my mental soundtrack for a few days now.
Nothing is much fun anymore.
I can feel my age setting in. I don't care to talk about much anymore as there is no point. I don't care to express much anymore because no one cares/it's all futile. I don't feel like even feeling good anymore because it will innevitably be counter acted by something awefull.
I still feel like a zombie walking through my life, even when I look happy I don't feel it much anymore, not like i used to, and I can't unsee what has brought me to this point.
there's more to say, but I can't put it into anything coherant at the moment due to exhaustion.