Well I guess it goes on...

[klo_fo_sho06]

Hmmmm...Ole ashy has given me some great advice on my current sitch. It has helped me not break down into tears and no one has even noticed that anything is wrong. I didn't cry myself to sleep last night, and I think this might be a good thing. I don't want to admit this, but maybe what happened was a good thing. If it was though, I don't want t o be good. I'll take being miserable and unhappy with chris than happy without him any day. And I still don't know why! Half the time all I could do was bitch at him because he was sooooo not what I wanted him to be, but the other half made everything totally worth it. I know that lately it was kinda crappy with us never seeing each other, but I couldn't just blame it on him, he has responsibilities that take up a lo tof his time. Unlike him I have nothing to do except go to practice, and that isn't even daily anymore. So I don't know what I'm trying to say, I just...want to be with him. And yeah I know...what happened to Kim that would never beg a guy to take her back or would hang up because he didn't agree with her? I have no Idea, but I wish I could be her again. Just for today so I could get over this. Even though I don't want to get over this.

I just don't know what I want anymore.

--K. Lo