reading on the treadmill

[klhart]

it has become if not a favored pastime, at least a pleasant escape. i feel like a slouch when i sit and read in this house. not everywhere do i feel this way about sitting a relaxing with a book in hand. just here. and i'm wondering if there isn't a thread to connect merton and vonnegut. perhaps the universal will to become is the same thing as a god who created the heavens and everything else that exists. that's not such a stretch, to conceive of god simply as energy. energy exists everywhere at once, can never be created nor destroyed and nothing happens without it. perhaps simplistic, but i'm starting as basically as possible. my version of basic. the most difficult thing to get rid of is the feeling of compromising my self and giving in by considering the christian notion of god. i feel like i'm selling out and taking the pre-packaged, fast food easy way out by simply buying into all of it. so the task at hand is to find a way to understand it for myself. insofar as i possibly can. right now, conflating god and energy works for me. "well, then, how are you going to reconcile jesus with this energy=god theory?" not sure yet. perhaps he was simply a brilliant man who had the uncanny abilities to wrangle the universal will to become and to see good in everyone.

in other news, the wind must have been fierce last night. there's a pine branch in the front yard. the pine trees are in the back yard.