and runnin and runnin and runnin and runnin

[kkidneys]

hey hey hey, started college on wednesday enjoyed it lots met some nice people was well excited to go back today enjoying it so far done some recording on mini disc player and also in a recording studio, felt like i was chuning into my own radio station haha we did an advert for condoms "safedom" i called em that haha so yarr anyway gonna b uber

Comments

[x_brokenharts_x]

steph u wer the one who sed htat you didnt want to see us when you started college because you wanted to get your head down and put your career first so we've give you a couple pf weeks to settle into colege and we've had time to setle into school and stuff.ok so we havnt been round or spoke to you in a while but like i sed its been a bit hectic.you remember what it was like before summer dont oyu?we hardly saw you then and yea i do agree it's a shame after we've all become closer but thats the way somethings go.im not wantin to fall out with you but you cant really blame everyone for the stuff that heyve sed.i know some of it was very harsh but when you've put all that in you journal when you know that the people who its about are goin to read ti?that wasnt really fair but thn again like you sed it is a journal and it is there to express your felins.what you sed bout non of us knowin bout how you were feelin with he whole austin situation really hurt me.so thanks alot.i was the first on round there when you old us bout it.u cried on my soulder so how can you say i dont understand.you know that me ciara and jen have been there fro you throughou the whole break up so that was realy unfair.ok so i know i might have sed some bad things and brought him up but ive sed them when i was angry.lok,like i sed i dont want to fall out with you,but it really doesnt feel like you value any of us right now.communication works boh ways.you cant blame us all for not gettin in touch with you when you havnt been in touch with us.it isnt all our faul.and i know dale n liz and even lade dont have anything to do with it but at the end of he day non of them like seein any of us bein upset bout suff.lade is not the reason our friendship is fallin apart at all and that was out of order you sayin that.he ,might have only been on my life for 5 mins but he hasnt fucked anything up at all.it wasnt just his fault the first time either."it takes rwo to tango"i believe were you words.so yea steph like ive sed twice now.please dont think im havin a go because i am actually very calm atm.im just sayin my pov.it was wrong for everyone else to get involved but at the end of he day they just care.you would get involved if you were in their shoes.we need to talk this out.maybe when you've calmed down a litle.text me and we can talk sometime his week.
shonagh x

[kkidneys]

im calm aswell evry1 has just overwhelmed me tonite i dont even feel liek im even valued n ur friendships anymore either, when i sed no one know =s how i felt u dont understand wat i mean by that i do need to tlak to u but i feel evry1 takes my entried out of context always fallin out with me or havina go at me dont forget im a knobhed yeah wen do u ever take ms eriously, yeah takes two to tango blah blah blah wasnt tlakin about that i was standin up for myself coz im not having my best mates boyfriend havin a go at me some stuff i sed was harsh but im not havin all these insignificant people having a go at me, i just feel that u all wanna get onw ithout me and thats how i feel cant help it yeah i had the impressin of my mum n dad lockin me indoors when i started college thats why is ed that to u all but they havent and that upsets me bcoz i feel liek iv lied to u and i havent but u all dotn seemt hat bothered, it upsets me when evry1 brings austin into shit liek this coz i cant explain why and im not prepared to over net thats my shit no one elses i deal with that no one else does i no evry 1 was upset but how can liz be shes using that as an excuse to make me feel guilty and it didnt work it just gets me annoyed thats wat id o cant help, i dont wanan fall out either but ur opinion and expressions ound sliek ur havin a go cant help seeing it that way but im not bothered u have a right but evry1 just tkaes wat ui say to seriuosly in my journal entries i feel i have to put lol or haha or hehe at end of evrythin just so noone takes it wrong way no one understands me except u lot but they preob never will give me that chance coz they spend this time gettin involved, i have tried get in touch coz the only way i can is thru internet and thats wat i do last nite spent an hour tryin IM u lot but it never works i cannot help it and i dotn wanna call round coz i feel ul be busy or not in or ur mum or craig wotn coz of school or watever, i no u was there thru this thing with austin and u dont no how grateful i am after u took me in out of the cold after all that shit lol i canot express how i am but thats summat u ahve to understand but here i go soundin selfish but it always seems that i get the blame for evrything, nobody asks my side of anything uv not seen me for a week a lot has happend to me this week evrything has been overwhelming iv been crying but no one stops to ask why or whats happened btu whenever i say stuff liek this nobody seems to understand and i always have to clarify what i say and i end up becoming this inconsiderate slefish bitcht hat evry1 calls me and be honest u all have this week i no u have and its bcoz how people have taken my journal ebtry and it wasnt even that bad i didnt mean it in the way evry1 does u dont no how happy i am for u lot i reallytrully am i just look out for u but other peoples opinions get in the way, and u say no one likes seeing u lot upset so i take it evry1 loves seeing me upset? this is why i say no one listens or cares about me or my shit apart from u lot but when nobheds do all this commenting it seems i am the one to get at etc etc if u understand wat i mean , i wasnt expectin ru response tomy message coz i thougth u understood but i dont no how oanyone is feeling atm i suppose i will just have to find out, this will all end up in an arguement so plz read wat i have put carefully so u dont take it the wrong way coz i am not meanng it in any other way but discussion ok? plz dont i dnt need sum1 else liekt hem lot especially a best friend