(no subject)
Jesus Christ, I've been living in Ground Hog Day this whole weekend, this whole week? (I even just had to retype that sentence cuz I accidently deleted it.) Oh mind fuck mind fuck mind fuck. I've been basically living in the Spretz this weekend, perpetually working a little bit on my architecture project, moving back and forth between living rooms and bedrooms and outside, and intermittently watching movies and listening to music and eating. And hearing this song over and over again. And I just watched most of the movie Waking Life, but I fell asleep for the end of it. DId I finish it in my dreams? I feel like I'm hearing all the same things twice, thrice, four times. My head is swimming. All I wanted to do this weekend was finish my architecture shit for my mid review and prepare for my spanish presenation. How much of all that have I done? Not a whole lot. I've had a lot more sleep than usual, and a lot more human interaction, but how much of it really meant anything? And physically I feel like shit because I haven't been eating very healthily and I don't think I slept very well last night because my back hurts. I don't want to become one of those girls who lives at the spretz. I felt so easily at home here, and I forgot about the aschool and my work ethic. Am I living in a dream? All those coincidences and connections that just seem to happen. One thing falls through so that another can occur. All these things fall into place, have I been dreaming that? All except for this past week. This past week/week and a half things haven't been flowing like usual. My body isn't functioning like it usually does, something falls through and it just falls through...there's no counterbalancing event. Something has ruptured my passionate, inspired little bubble. I suppose this has happened before but it usually follows some big life-changing event. There was no huge change a week and a half ago...that I remember...Then again, my perception of time has been so fucked up this whole semester because I don't have a regular sleeping schedule. What the hell, when the hell was a week and a half ago? I need to go. I have dealines. If I can make it through tomorrow...I mean, life will go on anyway whether I'm prepared or not right? And its never actually the end of the world. Deadlines...