I'm in a foul mood
Which is surprising considering it's Friday. It's just rainy and grey and everything this morning seemed to be harder than it needed to be. I tried to print out the song lists for the copied CDs I made and the background color didn't come out.....it just printed on a regular white sheet of paper. I tried twice to get it to pick up the background color and it refused. Stupid crappy-ass color printer!
I know I've been pretty quiet this week. I just haven't been able to get my thoughts together I suppose. It hasn't been bad or emotional.....it hasn't been anything really. So I just decided to work and play Bookworm and just get through the time. Bill is in the back of my mind......for some reason he seems very far away, like that whole thing ended a month or more ago even though it's only been a couple weeks. I still miss him...I had a dream about him last night. But it isn't really bothering me, it's just there I guess....in that little pocket of space in my brain that's marked 'Don't', not unlike that door in the puppet episode of Angel. (He barged in and disregarded the sign and look what happened to him!)
Adding to my confusion is the return to my life of a guy from my past. He and I never managed to get together, but we talked extensively...and then he kinda split. He tells me now that he had a lot of bad stuff going on in his life and that he didn't want to involve me in that. But that now things have righted themselves.......that he wants a second chance, that he was a fool to let me go, etc. I happen to agree with him on the fool bit, and I have been talking to him only 'cuz he didn't really do anything wrong. We hadn't even met up yet when we parted ways so it's not a huge thing. He did say goodbye, he didn't just dissapear. So now I am seeing him tomorrow....he knows my situation, that I am still newly post-Bill and do not want to rush. However, he is making his intentions clear about what he wants from me and I do feel slightly pressured. It's not a totally bad thing...to be wanted. He's funny, cute, intelligent, and he likes Buffy, so I doubt it would be torture to spend time with him. I guess I will just see how it goes....and go very, very slowly.
Oh and on a sepparate note....*blows up verticle file* See, Kirsten, now we don't have to do anything with it. Tee hee.
I know I've been pretty quiet this week. I just haven't been able to get my thoughts together I suppose. It hasn't been bad or emotional.....it hasn't been anything really. So I just decided to work and play Bookworm and just get through the time. Bill is in the back of my mind......for some reason he seems very far away, like that whole thing ended a month or more ago even though it's only been a couple weeks. I still miss him...I had a dream about him last night. But it isn't really bothering me, it's just there I guess....in that little pocket of space in my brain that's marked 'Don't', not unlike that door in the puppet episode of Angel. (He barged in and disregarded the sign and look what happened to him!)
Adding to my confusion is the return to my life of a guy from my past. He and I never managed to get together, but we talked extensively...and then he kinda split. He tells me now that he had a lot of bad stuff going on in his life and that he didn't want to involve me in that. But that now things have righted themselves.......that he wants a second chance, that he was a fool to let me go, etc. I happen to agree with him on the fool bit, and I have been talking to him only 'cuz he didn't really do anything wrong. We hadn't even met up yet when we parted ways so it's not a huge thing. He did say goodbye, he didn't just dissapear. So now I am seeing him tomorrow....he knows my situation, that I am still newly post-Bill and do not want to rush. However, he is making his intentions clear about what he wants from me and I do feel slightly pressured. It's not a totally bad thing...to be wanted. He's funny, cute, intelligent, and he likes Buffy, so I doubt it would be torture to spend time with him. I guess I will just see how it goes....and go very, very slowly.
Oh and on a sepparate note....*blows up verticle file* See, Kirsten, now we don't have to do anything with it. Tee hee.