I don't know the first time I felt unbeautiful, the day I chose not to eat

[kittycatty23q]

En oo jaksanut päivittää. Oon ollu koulusta niin väsynyt etten jaksa paljon mitään muuta.
Mutta tosiaan lukiota käyty about eka kuukausi. On ollut ihan okei kivaa, olen tutustunut ihmisiin ja opiskellut. Hienoa huomata, että pärjään. En olekaan tyhmä.
Syömishäiriö kummittelee jatkuvasti rinnallani. Se väsyttää mut.

I told another lie today
And I got through this day
No one saw through my games
I know the right words to say
Like "I don't feel well," "I ate before I came"
Then someone tells me how good I look
And for a moment, for a moment I am happy
But when I'm alone, no one hears me cry

I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Some days I'm still fighting to walk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be OK
Together we can make it through another day

I don't know the first time I felt unbeautiful
The day I chose not to eat
What I do know is how I've changed my life forever
I know I should know better
There are days when I'm OK
And for a moment, for a moment I find hope
But there are days when I'm not OK
And I need your help
So I'm letting go

I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Some days I'm still fighting to walk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be OK
Together we can make it through another day

You should know you're not on your own
These secrets are walls that keep us alone
I don't know when but I know now
Together we'll make it through somehow
(together we'll make it through somehow)

I need you to know
I'm not through the night
Some days I'm still fighting to walk towards the light
I need you to know
That we'll be OK
Together we can make it through another day