(no subject)
Hey, so you know what I would absolutely love to read at the moment? Frank Iero, Monster P.I. Frank is a private investigator in a world where monsters are real!
There may be some rumor about how he's a descendant of Frankenstein's monster, although Frank thinks it's the raving of his nutjob great-great-great-something or other aunt. (Everyone knows she's crazy, and anyway, Frank really, really doesn't want to know how that would even work, all right? And so what if Frank has weirdly discolored skin in places, he's got his tattoos to cover that up, and seriously. Seriously, how would that even work?) Frank thinks he probably got his love of horror movies and whatnot because of her and, hey, it might be kind of cool if she was right. Maybe.)
Anyway, Frank sort of got into the private investigator business by accident when James took on too many cases this one time and needed some help, and then after a while James sort of went on vacation and just never came back. Frank gets postcards from various tropical vacation-type places every few months that he pins up on a bulletin board in the office. (It doubles as a dartboard when Frank gets stuck on a case and takes to blaming James for getting him into the private investigator business. Also, when he's drunk.)
Frank likes to hang out at the bar Bob works at, even though Brian always glares at him and mutters under his breath when Frank comes in. Ray runs a little store just down the street that always smells like some weird spice Frank can't quite identify, and he's got weird things all over the place in there. (Frank calls it a voodoo shop, even though Ray tells him it isn't, and also, way to be an asshole, Frank.)
And then!
And then around Halloween one year this guy comes in, kind of pale, nervous, and, oh, yeah, really hot. Like, really hot.
The guy comes in and tells Frank he's looking for someone, that the guy he's looking for got lost, or stolen or something, Frank's a little distracted by the guy's face and whatnot.
They do that whole investigating thing, right, and Frank must be a really crappy investigator or something because he never really thought it was weird that Ray shut his shop down around the full moon.
Bob helpfully points this out to him when Frank goes to Bob's bar to find out if he knows where Ray is. Also, Frank's really never noticed just how many bandages Bob wears all the time. Like, huh, he hadn't thought Bob was that accident prone or anything. And Brian, right? He just thought Brian didn't like him, and that's why he never went out to shows or whatever with them. But it's the pale, nervous guy with the misplaced brother? Gerard? He's the one that makes Frank start noticing all the weird shit going on around him, but it's almost Halloween, and even though Frank never really put any stock in the bit about 'the barriers between the worlds being thinnest' then, he's starting to wonder.
...then there's more investigating and suchlike, and ~spooky happenings and oh, wow, surprise! Monsters are real, and this asshole vampire from Chicago had some of his people come in and grab Mikey while he was sleeping in his coffin one day. (By this point Frank is sort of beyond being surprised and just rolls with whatever comes his way, like Gerard and Mikey being vampires, and Ray being a werewolf, and Bob being either a semi-mummy or the invisible man's great-great-great-great-grandson, and Brian being a ghost. Like, an actual ghost who haunts Bob's bar and also helps manage it when he's not busy glaring at Frank. Also, Frank's nutjob great-great-great-something or other aunt was right, and Frank still does not want to know how the hell that works.)
Anyway, Pete thought it would hilarious and awesome to nab Mikey for Halloween shenanigans, and forgot to tell Gerard, or Mikey, and Mikey texted Gerard a million times but Gerard totally didn't think to check his messages and Frank is just, seriously? seriously?, but he got to meet Gerard and really, the guy's hot, even for a bloodsucker, and also, Frank doesn't think he has room to judge because, well.
And then they lived happily ever after? :D?
There may be some rumor about how he's a descendant of Frankenstein's monster, although Frank thinks it's the raving of his nutjob great-great-great-something or other aunt. (Everyone knows she's crazy, and anyway, Frank really, really doesn't want to know how that would even work, all right? And so what if Frank has weirdly discolored skin in places, he's got his tattoos to cover that up, and seriously. Seriously, how would that even work?) Frank thinks he probably got his love of horror movies and whatnot because of her and, hey, it might be kind of cool if she was right. Maybe.)
Anyway, Frank sort of got into the private investigator business by accident when James took on too many cases this one time and needed some help, and then after a while James sort of went on vacation and just never came back. Frank gets postcards from various tropical vacation-type places every few months that he pins up on a bulletin board in the office. (It doubles as a dartboard when Frank gets stuck on a case and takes to blaming James for getting him into the private investigator business. Also, when he's drunk.)
Frank likes to hang out at the bar Bob works at, even though Brian always glares at him and mutters under his breath when Frank comes in. Ray runs a little store just down the street that always smells like some weird spice Frank can't quite identify, and he's got weird things all over the place in there. (Frank calls it a voodoo shop, even though Ray tells him it isn't, and also, way to be an asshole, Frank.)
And then!
And then around Halloween one year this guy comes in, kind of pale, nervous, and, oh, yeah, really hot. Like, really hot.
The guy comes in and tells Frank he's looking for someone, that the guy he's looking for got lost, or stolen or something, Frank's a little distracted by the guy's face and whatnot.
They do that whole investigating thing, right, and Frank must be a really crappy investigator or something because he never really thought it was weird that Ray shut his shop down around the full moon.
Bob helpfully points this out to him when Frank goes to Bob's bar to find out if he knows where Ray is. Also, Frank's really never noticed just how many bandages Bob wears all the time. Like, huh, he hadn't thought Bob was that accident prone or anything. And Brian, right? He just thought Brian didn't like him, and that's why he never went out to shows or whatever with them. But it's the pale, nervous guy with the misplaced brother? Gerard? He's the one that makes Frank start noticing all the weird shit going on around him, but it's almost Halloween, and even though Frank never really put any stock in the bit about 'the barriers between the worlds being thinnest' then, he's starting to wonder.
...then there's more investigating and suchlike, and ~spooky happenings and oh, wow, surprise! Monsters are real, and this asshole vampire from Chicago had some of his people come in and grab Mikey while he was sleeping in his coffin one day. (By this point Frank is sort of beyond being surprised and just rolls with whatever comes his way, like Gerard and Mikey being vampires, and Ray being a werewolf, and Bob being either a semi-mummy or the invisible man's great-great-great-great-grandson, and Brian being a ghost. Like, an actual ghost who haunts Bob's bar and also helps manage it when he's not busy glaring at Frank. Also, Frank's nutjob great-great-great-something or other aunt was right, and Frank still does not want to know how the hell that works.)
Anyway, Pete thought it would hilarious and awesome to nab Mikey for Halloween shenanigans, and forgot to tell Gerard, or Mikey, and Mikey texted Gerard a million times but Gerard totally didn't think to check his messages and Frank is just, seriously? seriously?, but he got to meet Gerard and really, the guy's hot, even for a bloodsucker, and also, Frank doesn't think he has room to judge because, well.
And then they lived happily ever after? :D?