I have accomplished absolutely nothing of great importance yesterday, but I have pretty, pretty nails, so that's okay. (Seriously, I painted my nails and spent an embarassing amount of time cooing at them. I don't even know, okay.) Also, I just realized this October will make it two years since I beat my nail biting habit. It's kind of a ridiculous thing to be thrilled about, but that, too, is okay.
I have all these ideas and am picking at things here and there, but mostly short, self-indulgent things. Such as
this!
Gerard's a little pissed to find out that what they don't tell you about time travel is the disorientation. Sure, that might have something to do with it not being a widespread phenomenon or whatever, but really, a little warning would have been nice.
He waits until the room stops spinning, relieved when he realizes he can hear Ray talking to someone on the phone. A few seconds later he hears the others moving around too, Frank and Bob whispering to each other while Mikey mumbles to himself.
"Hey, I think everything's okay now," Ray says. "Gerard's back." There's a pause like whoever Ray's talking to is saying something, and then Ray's, "No, no, I'm pretty sure this one's ours. Yeah, okay. I'll call you later to let you know."
Gerard looks over when the bed dips under Frank's weight as he sits next to him, Ray's face coming into view over his shoulder a moment later.
"Gerard?"
He knows it's routine when this kind of thing happens, but going through the standard questions gets old after a while. He gets all of the answers right until they hit the one concerning their current location, at which point Ray gives up because they're on tour and no one's really sure where they are.
Frank helps him sit up and sticks close while Gerard takes a moment to ground himself in the present.
Mikey's futzing with the dinky hotel room coffee maker, which means he's either trying to figure out how he accidentally discovered time travel or still hasn't gotten his caffeine fix. Ray's typing away on his laptop, writing the whole mess up so he can get together with Brian and work on ways to avoid these kinds of situations in the future, and Bob's hunched down in one of the chairs, scowling at all of them.
The last time something like this happened was before Bob joined the band. They explained that weird shit just happened sometimes, and not to freak out if Bob suddenly found himself facing a portal to another world because Mikey was trying to microwave a pizza pocket.
(Mikey also needs to stop telling people it was Narnia. Gerard still has the sword at home which should be more than enough to prove it was definitely Middle-earth.)
"Okay, seriously.” Bob doesn't seem happy. "Mikey needs a new hobby."
Ray coughs and Frank buries his face against Gerard's shoulder, shoulders shaking with silent laughter.
Gerard doesn't really have the heart to tell Bob it's not a hobby so much as it is freak occurrences with Mikey and his adventures with appliances. "Yeah." Gerard elbows Frank when he snorts. "He probably should."
"Time travel, right?" Ray asks. "When did you end up?"
Gerard groans and shoves Frank as a preemptive measure because he knows how Frank's going to react when he hears the story. "Before the band," he says, and shoves Frank again when he pokes Gerard's side. "Maybe half a year?"
Ray nods and types for a few moments, "What happened?"
"I, uh. I met myself." Gerard narrows his eyes at Frank when he sits up, curiosity written all over his face. "We talked."
"Gerard," Ray sighs. "You know - "
"Comics!" Gerard knows all about fucking with the space-time continuum, he's gotten the lecture from Brian enough times. "We talked about comics!"
Ray looks up, expression neutral. "What?"
Gerard sighs and tells them what happened. Apparently reality is stranger than fiction, or maybe just the weird shit their fans on the internet come up with. He still doesn't understand why time travel is supposed to result in him having sex with a past version of himself, but at least that sounds cooler than getting into a in-depth discussion about comic books.
The silence that follows drags on for several long moments until Frank starts laughing so hard he rolls right off the bed, helped along by Gerard's foot.
"Okay, then," Ray says brightly as he closes the lid of his laptop. He's trying and failing to hide his smile, careful not to look at Gerard. "I think I've got everything I need, thanks. I have to go call Brian to let him know things are okay here.”
Ray stumbles towards the door, wheezing with the effort to hold his laughter in until he's out of the room. Gerard appreciates the fact that at Ray at least acts like he isn't a complete bastard. Bob, like other people Gerard could name, doesn't even try to hide his own laughter as he follows Ray out.
"Mikey, next time you need coffee, please, please, please just call fucking room service." Gerard loves his brother, he just wishes Mikey would stop messing with the laws of physics or whatever the hell it is he does.
Mikey shrugs, eyes bright with amusement and something a hell of a lot like relief. Watching him, Gerard realizes that this would probably be the part where they have a moment, but stupid Frank is on the floor crying with laughter.
He's literally crying with laughter, something Gerard had always thought was just a figure of speech until now.
"Hey, thanks for the coffee," Mikey says, tipping his coffee at him in a little salute as he leaves.
Gerard sighs and gets up to lock the door after him, and goes to check on Frank to make sure he hasn't swallowed his tongue. "Are you done, or do you need a few more minutes?"
Frank flaps a hand at him. "Oh, my god," Frank gasps out, still giggling a little as he sits up, wiping his eyes. "Oh, my god, you're such a nerd."
Gerard kicks Frank in the ribs.
"Ow, motherfucker." Frank takes a swipe at him, but it's not all that effective since he's still laughing. "Nerd."
Like that's such an insult.
Gerard sighs and pulls Frank on the bed. He's a squirmy fucker though, and Gerard can't help it if he accidentally knees him in the ribs once or twice or a few more times than that in the process.
“Hey,” Frank says, smiling at him. "What's going on?"
"I was led to believe time travel leads to sex,” Gerard says, trying for a matter of fact tone of voice. "And seeing as I was too busy talking to myself about comics, I'll have to settle for you."
"Wow," Frank says, eyebrows going up. "That's. That's really sweet. Romantic, even."
"Fuck you," Gerard says, tugging at the bottom of Frank's shirt. Hotel nights are precious and rare, and Frank needs to get with the program if he wants to make the most of it.
"Oh. Oh, hey," Frank says, fingers wrapping around Gerard's wrists to stop him. He gives Gerard his most earnest look because he's an annoying little shit. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather talk about Batman or something? I mean, I don't want to - "
"Seriously," Gerard says, twisting his wrists out of Frank's hands to push him back down on the bed. “Fuck you."
Frank grins. "Well, if you're sure.”
Gerard doesn't waste anymore time showing him just how sure he is.
Also, also! SLEEP NOW.