Star Trek Fic: Enough with the Figgy Pudding
Happy holidays, Merry Christmas, and all that jazz :):) This fic made me smile at its ridiculousness and I think that’s a good thing and I hope you like it as well :)
Title: Enough with the Figgy Pudding
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: Star Trek (AOS)
Characters: Chris Pike, Leonard McCoy, Joanna McCoy, Jim Kirk, Phil Boyce
Word Count: 1120
Disclaimer: This story is for fun and no profit. I do not own any of these characters --I'm just borrowing them briefly.
Summary: Chris’ plan was to give his boyfriend’s daughter a great Christmas-what could possibly go wrong?
A/N: The overheard conversation prompt from the Weekend Challenge helped inspire me to go in a different direction with this fic. Also, I made up all of the info about poinsettia leaves causing anaphylaxis --just go with it :):)
“So Dad, does this mean we can get a dog now?”
Leonard McCoy stared at his mischievous daughter in disbelief before he ruefully shook his head. “Jo don’t start, it’s been a hell of a day.”
His fifteen year old daughter held up her hand in an exact replica of his “Get the hell out of my sickbay Jim!” gesture before she answered. “Hey, I didn’t put Uncle Jim in the hospital on Christmas Eve.” She gestured to the guilty looking admiral. “That would be your new boyfriend’s fault.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Len immediately snapped back.
The depressed looking admiral, who now looked less sad because his not-boyfriend was talking to him and not frantically running around Starfleet Medicals’ emergency room, chimed in with a “We prefer ‘gentleman caller.’”
Len sighed dramatically as his still snickering daughter high-fived the admiral.
Chris Pike was unsure how his carefully arranged Christmas plans could have gone so horribly awry in such a short amount of time.
“Phil, when have my plans ever gone wrong?”
Chris looked wearily at his best friend before speaking. “Phil, I really don’t need you throwing my words back in my face like that!”
Phil Boyce smiled sympathetically before he nodded to the hospital’s waiting room.
“You’re going to have to face him sometime you know.”
Chris closed his eyes in resignation before he could even begin to form a response. “He’s never going to forgive me for this.”
Phil snorted derisively, shaking his head when Chris’s eyes snapped open in irritation. “Don’t be so melodramatic. Leonard McCoy’s been Jim Kirk’s doctor for the past four years, and he’s still cataloging all of Jim’s allergies.”
The drama all started with Chris’ wanting to impress the crap out of Len’s daughter.
It was a rare treat for the doctor to get Joanna for the entire Christmas holiday--her mother Jocelyn and her new husband were going on a cruise to Antarctica and the young girl begged to be able to stay with her dad.
So now Chris had an entire week to show the teenager that he loved her dad and that, one day not too far in the future, he was going to be the coolest step-dad ever.
Both Phil and Jim urged him not to go too over the top, Jim especially wanting his mentor to realize that the young girl didn’t need any extra convincing. “Chris, Jo can see how happy her dad is with you. You don’t need to do anything extreme.”
And if Chris was being honest with himself, he’d admit that it was Jim’s familiarity with both of the McCoys that was making him uncomfortably jealous and wanting to prove that he knew them as well as “Uncle Jim.”
Which was probably how they landed in the emergency room with Jim’s famous allergies making a frightening appearance in what should have been a peaceful family dinner.
Chris’s master plan involved him looking up every possible recipe he could find on old fashioned Southern holiday food and attempting to make every dessert he could.
He made a pecan pie, a coconut cake, a salty honey pie, a chocolate peanut butter pie and an apple praline pie.
Len had asked, half-jokingly “if all of the Enterprise staff is coming to visit instead of just the bridge and sickbay crews?”
Chris had smiled affectionately before speaking in such a low voice Len had to lean in to hear him. “I didn’t know which pie was Joanna’s favorite, so I made them all.”
But before Len could respond to such a sweet gesture, Jim popped into the kitchen and ruined the moment. “We deep frying the turkey this year or what?”
Jim’s food allergies were practically legendary in Starfleet, so when it turned out that Jim wasn’t allergic to the gingerbread pumpkin pie or the bacon chocolate cookies but rather to the decorations themselves, everyone was surprised.
The combination of the magnolia pine garland leaves and the leaves from the poinsettia plants gave the young captain hives.
That wouldn’t have been life threatening in itself but his immune system was now compromised, so when Jim ate six pink peppermint macaroons in under one minute, his nervous system went into anaphylaxis and he stopped breathing.
Len was able to trace the reaction back to the food dye that Chris used for the pink colored cookies which happened to be an extract of the poinsettia leaves.
Thankfully, Jim had an epinephrine pen on him and he also happened to be in the presence of one of Starfleet’s best doctors but the possibilities of what could have happened made Chris sick to his stomach.
Chris was also grateful that the ER doctor on call was his best friend Phil, so between him and Len, Jim was in the best possible hands. Phil was going over Jim’s chart with Len by his side and Chris closed his eyes and prayed to whatever gods were listening that if Jim didn’t suffer any lasting damage, this would be the last time Chris ever baked.
Or decorated or even celebrated any yuletide festivities because in his zeal to impress his boyfriend’s daughter, he nearly killed the man’s best friend.
He felt rather then saw Len and Phil come over to stand on either side of him. “Okay drama queen, we’re releasing Jim.”
Chris could hear the laughter in Phil’s voice but he stubbornly kept his eyes closed, and it wasn’t until Len’s hand enclosed around his tightly wound fist that Chris opened his eyes. He expected to see anger or at least annoyance but instead he found Len smiling at him.
An exhausted smile, but it was a smile and it was directed at him.
Chris leaned in, resting his forehead against the chest of the man he was madly in love and he mumbled out an apology at ruining Christmas.
Len pulled Chris into a tight hug and whispered against his ear. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You were trying to give us a lovely Christmas and…”
“I almost killed Jim,” Chris finished for him.
“You didn’t almost kill Jim!” Len admonished. “How could you know he was allergic to poinsettia leaves?”
Of course that was when Joanna asked for a dog and Chris realized that despite his absolute worry and horror, this was one of the nicest Christmas Eves he’d ever spent.
At least he decided not to make the figgy pudding right? Chris smiled to himself, wondering if he should make the dessert next year, but only if Phil would be there because he was the only one who ate the stuff.
He nodded to himself, loving the idea that he had a “next year” to look forward to.
Title: Enough with the Figgy Pudding
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: Star Trek (AOS)
Characters: Chris Pike, Leonard McCoy, Joanna McCoy, Jim Kirk, Phil Boyce
Word Count: 1120
Disclaimer: This story is for fun and no profit. I do not own any of these characters --I'm just borrowing them briefly.
Summary: Chris’ plan was to give his boyfriend’s daughter a great Christmas-what could possibly go wrong?
A/N: The overheard conversation prompt from the Weekend Challenge helped inspire me to go in a different direction with this fic. Also, I made up all of the info about poinsettia leaves causing anaphylaxis --just go with it :):)
“So Dad, does this mean we can get a dog now?”
Leonard McCoy stared at his mischievous daughter in disbelief before he ruefully shook his head. “Jo don’t start, it’s been a hell of a day.”
His fifteen year old daughter held up her hand in an exact replica of his “Get the hell out of my sickbay Jim!” gesture before she answered. “Hey, I didn’t put Uncle Jim in the hospital on Christmas Eve.” She gestured to the guilty looking admiral. “That would be your new boyfriend’s fault.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Len immediately snapped back.
The depressed looking admiral, who now looked less sad because his not-boyfriend was talking to him and not frantically running around Starfleet Medicals’ emergency room, chimed in with a “We prefer ‘gentleman caller.’”
Len sighed dramatically as his still snickering daughter high-fived the admiral.
Chris Pike was unsure how his carefully arranged Christmas plans could have gone so horribly awry in such a short amount of time.
“Phil, when have my plans ever gone wrong?”
Chris looked wearily at his best friend before speaking. “Phil, I really don’t need you throwing my words back in my face like that!”
Phil Boyce smiled sympathetically before he nodded to the hospital’s waiting room.
“You’re going to have to face him sometime you know.”
Chris closed his eyes in resignation before he could even begin to form a response. “He’s never going to forgive me for this.”
Phil snorted derisively, shaking his head when Chris’s eyes snapped open in irritation. “Don’t be so melodramatic. Leonard McCoy’s been Jim Kirk’s doctor for the past four years, and he’s still cataloging all of Jim’s allergies.”
The drama all started with Chris’ wanting to impress the crap out of Len’s daughter.
It was a rare treat for the doctor to get Joanna for the entire Christmas holiday--her mother Jocelyn and her new husband were going on a cruise to Antarctica and the young girl begged to be able to stay with her dad.
So now Chris had an entire week to show the teenager that he loved her dad and that, one day not too far in the future, he was going to be the coolest step-dad ever.
Both Phil and Jim urged him not to go too over the top, Jim especially wanting his mentor to realize that the young girl didn’t need any extra convincing. “Chris, Jo can see how happy her dad is with you. You don’t need to do anything extreme.”
And if Chris was being honest with himself, he’d admit that it was Jim’s familiarity with both of the McCoys that was making him uncomfortably jealous and wanting to prove that he knew them as well as “Uncle Jim.”
Which was probably how they landed in the emergency room with Jim’s famous allergies making a frightening appearance in what should have been a peaceful family dinner.
Chris’s master plan involved him looking up every possible recipe he could find on old fashioned Southern holiday food and attempting to make every dessert he could.
He made a pecan pie, a coconut cake, a salty honey pie, a chocolate peanut butter pie and an apple praline pie.
Len had asked, half-jokingly “if all of the Enterprise staff is coming to visit instead of just the bridge and sickbay crews?”
Chris had smiled affectionately before speaking in such a low voice Len had to lean in to hear him. “I didn’t know which pie was Joanna’s favorite, so I made them all.”
But before Len could respond to such a sweet gesture, Jim popped into the kitchen and ruined the moment. “We deep frying the turkey this year or what?”
Jim’s food allergies were practically legendary in Starfleet, so when it turned out that Jim wasn’t allergic to the gingerbread pumpkin pie or the bacon chocolate cookies but rather to the decorations themselves, everyone was surprised.
The combination of the magnolia pine garland leaves and the leaves from the poinsettia plants gave the young captain hives.
That wouldn’t have been life threatening in itself but his immune system was now compromised, so when Jim ate six pink peppermint macaroons in under one minute, his nervous system went into anaphylaxis and he stopped breathing.
Len was able to trace the reaction back to the food dye that Chris used for the pink colored cookies which happened to be an extract of the poinsettia leaves.
Thankfully, Jim had an epinephrine pen on him and he also happened to be in the presence of one of Starfleet’s best doctors but the possibilities of what could have happened made Chris sick to his stomach.
Chris was also grateful that the ER doctor on call was his best friend Phil, so between him and Len, Jim was in the best possible hands. Phil was going over Jim’s chart with Len by his side and Chris closed his eyes and prayed to whatever gods were listening that if Jim didn’t suffer any lasting damage, this would be the last time Chris ever baked.
Or decorated or even celebrated any yuletide festivities because in his zeal to impress his boyfriend’s daughter, he nearly killed the man’s best friend.
He felt rather then saw Len and Phil come over to stand on either side of him. “Okay drama queen, we’re releasing Jim.”
Chris could hear the laughter in Phil’s voice but he stubbornly kept his eyes closed, and it wasn’t until Len’s hand enclosed around his tightly wound fist that Chris opened his eyes. He expected to see anger or at least annoyance but instead he found Len smiling at him.
An exhausted smile, but it was a smile and it was directed at him.
Chris leaned in, resting his forehead against the chest of the man he was madly in love and he mumbled out an apology at ruining Christmas.
Len pulled Chris into a tight hug and whispered against his ear. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You were trying to give us a lovely Christmas and…”
“I almost killed Jim,” Chris finished for him.
“You didn’t almost kill Jim!” Len admonished. “How could you know he was allergic to poinsettia leaves?”
Of course that was when Joanna asked for a dog and Chris realized that despite his absolute worry and horror, this was one of the nicest Christmas Eves he’d ever spent.
At least he decided not to make the figgy pudding right? Chris smiled to himself, wondering if he should make the dessert next year, but only if Phil would be there because he was the only one who ate the stuff.
He nodded to himself, loving the idea that he had a “next year” to look forward to.