in kite_head lj terms, 4 days is an eternity...
Has the world changed or have I changed? That always seems to be a common refrain that is easy to exploit at any time. Unfortunately for you, dear reader, this entry won't be about The Smiths/Morrissey; it won't even be overwhelmingly about cultural musings related to my music taste. It will, however, begin with music...
On this day in 1987, Pink Floyd released A Momentary Lapse of Reason. (Incidentally, yesterday, 6 September, was Roger Water's 68th Birthday). I've only listened to the complete album once or twice. I liked it, despite its flaws --namely, that it was bloated, dinosaur rock from a bloated, dinosaur band that had largely lost the relevance it had in the 1970s. My favourite track from it is still "Learning to Fly."
Whenever I think of that song, I come back to the final bulk of the lyrics:
Above the planet on a wing and a prayer,
My grubby halo, a vapour trail in the empty air,
Across the clouds I see my shadow fly
Out of the corner of my watering eye
A dream unthreatened by the morning light
Could blow this soul right through the roof of the night
There's no sensation to compare with this
Suspended animation, a state of bliss
Can't keep my mind from the circling skies
Tongue-tied and twisted just an earth-bound misfit, I
The message is hopeful and inspirational --even if the hackneyed conveyance, via a bloated, 1980s power-ballad is a bit disturbing. Kind of like with Starship's "We Built This City" and its anti-corporate message via a completely corporate script. Rock is dead, unfortunately; the revolution has been co-opted so as to be irrelevant. Sort of.
Before I delve too far into the cultural terrain (which I said I would steer away from!) I want to get to that message of hope and inspiration.
My usual, musical dosage of hope lately has been coming from a decidedly Christian rock song:
"Awaiting on You All," by George Harrison.
Lately I've been just so tired, so overwhelmed. Due to some changes/flexibility in schedule, however, I'm starting to get comfortable and do what I need to do. I am doing the right things, for the right reasons.
Of course, to borrow from a propaganda sign that hung up in the classrooms when I was in high school: "what is popular is not always right; and what is right is not always popular."
I guess what I'm saying is, I spent a good amount of today just catching up. I checked on news sources. I tweeted a lot. I showed up and was accountable. Now, did I do the best job I could? No. Also, there was the debilitating gas I had this afternoon/evening. There is, of course, much more to be done. I will do it, damnit.
I'm not backing down; I'm stepping up the fight. Again, to briefly summarize one of the current narratives I am exploring: I spent most of the past several years (from 16 October 2003 to 7 April 2011) in a complete state of incomprehensible demoralization. Has my life completely changed for the better? I don't know. It is still too hard to really decide. That is over 7 years --out of a current total of some 25 -- in which I lived as a failure.
I've actually had it relatively lucky. In all that time, I did manage to finish HS and earn 2 degrees. But aside from those meaningless papers (which arn't so meaningless to many, actually; I'm sorry if I offended anyone with that), what do I have? I'm 25, unemployed, heavily in debt, with no real material items to show for anything I've done.
Despite all this, I have hope. I know things can change. For me, it took having a gastric bypass, getting sober, and continued efforts (since 2008) to turn in an application to the credential program and keep it current. I am now, finally, in the program. I'm doing well, I think (but I could be fooling myself, naturally). The most amazing thing about all this, is that I didn't believe any of what I just wrote, not even 5 months ago, and certainly not any time before that.
I still have my low points, my moments of doubt. I've had a lot of anger/resentment issues. Progress, not perfection; after all, nobody's perfect.
Today was one of those moments where I didn't really have an agenda in regards to updating lj. I didn't have any pressing thoughts/ideas to explore. I've been a a bit more active on the bully pulpit (twitter). Have I abused it? Absolutely. I've also started being active on amazon.com political forums.
All in all, I could have really just said this:
KISS --Keep It Simple, Stupid.
N.B. A lot of these are distillations of thoughts I've been commenting to some of you about on your ljs, two people in particular. You know who you are. Thanks for inspiring me; I hope that I could inspire you.
Final thought --I've been haunted a lot, today at least, by the concept of the dialectical. Apparently, according to wiki, at least, this concept goes back to Socrates. I'm most familiar with it in the Hegelian/Marxist tradition...
Okay, I've gone on too much. Cheers!
On this day in 1987, Pink Floyd released A Momentary Lapse of Reason. (Incidentally, yesterday, 6 September, was Roger Water's 68th Birthday). I've only listened to the complete album once or twice. I liked it, despite its flaws --namely, that it was bloated, dinosaur rock from a bloated, dinosaur band that had largely lost the relevance it had in the 1970s. My favourite track from it is still "Learning to Fly."
Whenever I think of that song, I come back to the final bulk of the lyrics:
Above the planet on a wing and a prayer,
My grubby halo, a vapour trail in the empty air,
Across the clouds I see my shadow fly
Out of the corner of my watering eye
A dream unthreatened by the morning light
Could blow this soul right through the roof of the night
There's no sensation to compare with this
Suspended animation, a state of bliss
Can't keep my mind from the circling skies
Tongue-tied and twisted just an earth-bound misfit, I
The message is hopeful and inspirational --even if the hackneyed conveyance, via a bloated, 1980s power-ballad is a bit disturbing. Kind of like with Starship's "We Built This City" and its anti-corporate message via a completely corporate script. Rock is dead, unfortunately; the revolution has been co-opted so as to be irrelevant. Sort of.
Before I delve too far into the cultural terrain (which I said I would steer away from!) I want to get to that message of hope and inspiration.
My usual, musical dosage of hope lately has been coming from a decidedly Christian rock song:
"Awaiting on You All," by George Harrison.
Lately I've been just so tired, so overwhelmed. Due to some changes/flexibility in schedule, however, I'm starting to get comfortable and do what I need to do. I am doing the right things, for the right reasons.
Of course, to borrow from a propaganda sign that hung up in the classrooms when I was in high school: "what is popular is not always right; and what is right is not always popular."
I guess what I'm saying is, I spent a good amount of today just catching up. I checked on news sources. I tweeted a lot. I showed up and was accountable. Now, did I do the best job I could? No. Also, there was the debilitating gas I had this afternoon/evening. There is, of course, much more to be done. I will do it, damnit.
I'm not backing down; I'm stepping up the fight. Again, to briefly summarize one of the current narratives I am exploring: I spent most of the past several years (from 16 October 2003 to 7 April 2011) in a complete state of incomprehensible demoralization. Has my life completely changed for the better? I don't know. It is still too hard to really decide. That is over 7 years --out of a current total of some 25 -- in which I lived as a failure.
I've actually had it relatively lucky. In all that time, I did manage to finish HS and earn 2 degrees. But aside from those meaningless papers (which arn't so meaningless to many, actually; I'm sorry if I offended anyone with that), what do I have? I'm 25, unemployed, heavily in debt, with no real material items to show for anything I've done.
Despite all this, I have hope. I know things can change. For me, it took having a gastric bypass, getting sober, and continued efforts (since 2008) to turn in an application to the credential program and keep it current. I am now, finally, in the program. I'm doing well, I think (but I could be fooling myself, naturally). The most amazing thing about all this, is that I didn't believe any of what I just wrote, not even 5 months ago, and certainly not any time before that.
I still have my low points, my moments of doubt. I've had a lot of anger/resentment issues. Progress, not perfection; after all, nobody's perfect.
Today was one of those moments where I didn't really have an agenda in regards to updating lj. I didn't have any pressing thoughts/ideas to explore. I've been a a bit more active on the bully pulpit (twitter). Have I abused it? Absolutely. I've also started being active on amazon.com political forums.
All in all, I could have really just said this:
KISS --Keep It Simple, Stupid.
N.B. A lot of these are distillations of thoughts I've been commenting to some of you about on your ljs, two people in particular. You know who you are. Thanks for inspiring me; I hope that I could inspire you.
Final thought --I've been haunted a lot, today at least, by the concept of the dialectical. Apparently, according to wiki, at least, this concept goes back to Socrates. I'm most familiar with it in the Hegelian/Marxist tradition...
Okay, I've gone on too much. Cheers!