HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

[kitchensexslave]

It is xxamlaxx 's birthday tomorrow, and since I am too far away to gift her with sexual favours, I dedicated myself and my somewhat tattered voice to recording a special birthday present for her:

The weirdest damn family in the friggin world by xxamlaxx ~podfic~ (about 1 hour of hilarious Dean/Castiel crack)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BB, YOU CRAZY PERSON YOU!! I WOULD HAVE

Comments

[xxamlaxx]

Um, for some reason the link is not working for me. NOOO.

[kitchensexslave]

It's because I am made of fail. It's all fixed now!

[xxamlaxx]

You aren't made of fail. You're made of...other things, squishy things, things that Alastair likes.

[kitchensexslave]

...that doesn't exactly make me feel better...

[xxamlaxx]

Oh, well, then you're made of puppies and kittens and rainbows and sex.

[kitchensexslave]

ALASTAIR LIKES ALL OF THESE D: D: D:

[xxamlaxx]

CLEARLY WE DON'T KNOW THE SAME ALASTAIR.

[kitchensexslave]

I'M NOT SAYING HE DOESN'T LIKE TO RAPE THEM, BUT HE DOES LIKE THEM IN HIS OWN SPECIAL WAY.

[xxamlaxx]

OH GOD NOW I'M PICTURING HIM RAEPING RAINBOWS. AND DEAN'S ALL "NOOO ALASTAIR, LEAVE THE RAINBOW ALONE, IT WASN'T DOING ANYTHING"

[kitchensexslave]

THE RAINBOW LOVES IT, SECRETLY.

YOU KNOW, WHENEVER IT RAINS, THAT'S A RAINBOW CRYING PTSD TEARS.

[xxamlaxx]

OMFG NO I WANT TO WRITE THIS NOW.

DAMN YOU. BUT FIRST I'M GOING TO FINISH DEAN/RACCOON CRACK. MR. FLUFFLES TEACHES DEAN ABOUT HOW GOD ISN'T REAL AND HE'S A MONKEY.

[kitchensexslave]

BOTH ARE STARTLING TEMPTING, WHY NOT COMBINE THE TWO? AS EVIDENCE OF THE NON-EXISTENCE OF GOD, MR FLUFFLES SHOWS DEAN THE MOST HORRIFIC THING CONCEIVABLE: ALASTAIR RAEPING A RAINBOW.

[xxamlaxx]

BUT...MR. FLUFFLES IS ACTUALLY CHARLES DARWIN. I DON'T THINK CHARLES DARWIN HAS SEEN ALASTAIR RAEPING A RAINBOW. UNLESS THAT IS WHERE THE THEORY OF EVOLUTION COMES FROM. ALL THINGS EVOLVED IN AN ATTEMPT TO KEEP FROM BEING RAEPED BY ALASTAIR.

[xxamlaxx]

Also, lolol, you say Jesus in this podfic. I just realized for the first time that I'm the only one who ever pronounced Jesus' name in Spanish. Fail on my part.

Not done yet, but I <3 it.

[kitchensexslave]

LOL, READER FAIL! SORRY, I KNOW MY ACCENT ISN'T EXACTLY SUPER APPROPRIATE, AND I'M SORRY ABOUT THE PRONUNCIATION... IT HONESTLY DIDN'T OCCUR TO ME :( IS THE SPANISH PRONUNCIATION LIKE "EE-SUS"?

ALSO, JUST NOTICED I CAPSLOCKED THIS XD. AH WELL, I AM RATHER DEHYDRATED, IT'S NOT MY FAULT.

[xxamlaxx]

NO, NO, IT WASN'T YOU. CLEARLY IT'S JESUS, BUT WHENEVER SOMEONE WHO DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS ACTUALLY JESUS TALKED TO HIM I HEARD THE SPANISH PRONUNCIATION. IT'S BECAUSE I HAVE LIKE A BAJILLION RELATIVES NAMED JESUS, THREE UNCLES, AT LEAST ONE COUSIN, A GREAT-GRANDPA, JESUS JESUS JESUS.

I HAD TO CARRY ON THE CASPLOCK, LEST I LET YOU WIN. HERM I WONDER WHY???? BLAME IT ON THE AAAA-AAA-AAALCOHOL.