Long update, sorry

[kissxbangxcore]

So here I am...Eyes swollen, sister away at ozzfest, parents pissed at me, and Claude at his own house probably sleeping...here I am, alone and needing someone to talk to more than ever. This night didn't seem so horrible until I got home. I was running a little behind from taking Claude home because my poor self saw a baby kitten on elk creek rd. walking in the road and kept driving, then turned around to try and pick it up and bring it back here...that failed. So I drove back into Trenton towards Gas America because I was hungry and wanted to stop by Taco Bell to get something to eat before I came home. Ended up my father called me because Claude thought I called from the house but I didn't, and asked me where I was saying Claude told him I had left 20 minutes ago. I told him I was going to get something to eat but scratch that idea since they obviously wanted me home. So I sped home, could have easily gotten pulled over twice, but didn't, and made it in the door safely. Well I guess I dropped the keys on the table too hard or something because my dad said "What was that" while I was walking to the bathroom...so I automactically said I was sorry, and he said it again, and I then again said "I am SO sorry." and proceeded to use the bathroom. He then stomped back to his room saying he was "so sick of this shit..." of what shit dad? What is it? Am I the "less than perfect" daughter, that isn't allowed to be 10 minutes late sometimes? I'm sorry that I AM 18, and would like a little more freedom than I am experiencing here in this household. I need a fucking car like crazy. So bad. So, Tuesday, I am going Job hunting once again so that I can find something decent and a cheap apartment for the time being. I guess I made a mistake when I yelled " I CAN'T WAIT TO GET OUT OF HERE, SERIOUSLY" because my mom just nodded her head like it was the wrong thing to say...If I had the funds to do so, I'd be gone by now. Out of Trenton. This place is a good place to grow up, but not stay after you graduate High School. Though it's only been about 3 months since school let out and I finished, it still sucks here, and I hate it. Me and Claude both need out so badly. He still may be doing the Coast Guard, but I couldn't live with him on the base unless we got married. . . we can't afford a wedding right now, probably a marrige license, but I am not going to rush him into that. I know he wants it as much as I do, but we just have to wait to see whats going to happen. If he goes, I'm going to probably have to get an apartment down there by myself so I can atleast be closer to him knowing that I can see him when he has some time off....
I made a pay pal account, but I dont know how to put it on anything for people to donate. It's my Car, college, apartment, anything fund. You can donate a penny, or more....it's up to you. I'll let you know when I get that up and working though....
Rochelle, we need a day together soon, I want to take you out for ice cream and whatnot....fun times are needed...I love you.
Claude, I love you with all my heart...you're the one thing keeping me alive..thank you.

chels