So maybe I still want a livejournal...

[kisstherain789]

I don't care if no one reads this. I still want one. Because it's a lot easier to express myself here. I feel like such a fag saying that, but fuck it. And plus it helps me to sort my thoughts. And right now that's something I need to do.

I am sooooo confused right now. I don't know what to do. It's hard to find someone to understand you. Especially when you don't even quite understand yourself. I feel like I don't even know myself right now, that I'm changing so much and it's hard to keep up with myself. Nothing is black and white anymore. Is it me? Am I being emotional and sensitive? What's wrong with me??

I feel unappreciated, angry with myself because I let it be like that. All I want is some respect and love. Am I needy and annoying? Someone show me how to be. I want to feel close to you again, but I keep myself from that when I don't let you knwo how I feel. It's so hard to do sometimes, and sometimes I don't really know if I want to or should. What am I doing wrong? I need to find some fucking balls, and figure things out.

I need people to stop judging me. Fuck everyone. I just want the freedom to be myself. I feel so supressed.