I agree with your whole post until we get to the final sentence. I'm not sure how you've picked what goes in the "worth doing" list versus the "not particularly feminist actions" list. For example it isnt immediately obvious to me that "challenging misogynistic language" challenges the "assumptions of those around us" any more or less than not shaving does. Both are public. Both threaten "average joe", as evidenced by the fact that average joe usually has a strong reaction to both (be it making a point to make fun of or insult hairy legs, or becoming strongly defensive when called on a misogynistic comment). All of these things are intertwined, because all of them are part of patriarchy (and its assumptions and norms) and the binary gender system.
I just don't see why it has to be one or the other of those lists, or even the basis for making the distinction you're trying to make between "lifestyle" changes and "feminist actions." Everything we as women do is important, in different ways. And all of us have 'natural' predilections to certain issues within feminism, and not so much drive to participate in others. And that's ok in my book.
I was trying to differentiate between things which have an effect upon other people and things which don't. I forgot that for a lot of women, whether they shave their legs does have an effect on other people because, for a number of reasons, no one ever notices whether or not I shave my legs. If you interact with people who do notice whether you shave your legs it does have an effect because it could challenge beauty standards.
I just think that there's a perception that feminism is all about making the right feminist choices and that will make you magically immune from patriarchy.
if no one you interact with ever notices whether you shave your legs or not you're really lucky and-- I would think-- atypical.
Also, though, I think everything we do effects people around us. I mean, say you had a young daughter. I'm sure she would notice whether you shaved your legs or not. She might not comment on it, but she would definitely notice it. Kids are so attune to things like that, and kids are demonstrably aware of gender norms at surprisingly young ages.
Children are, I think, a good example of how even the most "personal" things we do effect society at large. In a way, not shaving could be seen as part of "raising our children to question sexism." We raise them and then they go out into the world and influence untold amounts of other people.
I just don't see why it has to be one or the other of those lists, or even the basis for making the distinction you're trying to make between "lifestyle" changes and "feminist actions." Everything we as women do is important, in different ways. And all of us have 'natural' predilections to certain issues within feminism, and not so much drive to participate in others. And that's ok in my book.
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I just think that there's a perception that feminism is all about making the right feminist choices and that will make you magically immune from patriarchy.
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if no one you interact with ever notices whether you shave your legs or not you're really lucky and-- I would think-- atypical.
Also, though, I think everything we do effects people around us. I mean, say you had a young daughter. I'm sure she would notice whether you shaved your legs or not. She might not comment on it, but she would definitely notice it. Kids are so attune to things like that, and kids are demonstrably aware of gender norms at surprisingly young ages.
Children are, I think, a good example of how even the most "personal" things we do effect society at large. In a way, not shaving could be seen as part of "raising our children to question sexism." We raise them and then they go out into the world and influence untold amounts of other people.
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