Anti vagina monologue
Last Thursday, as I was waiting for my mom’s doctor’s appointment, I went through a medicine-specialized magazine. There was this article about intimate plastic surgery. It basically talked about ways to modify women’s clitoris, labia, etc. One very interesting bit about pubian liposuction, by the way.
There was one procedure in particular, though, that called my attention. It was a technique to make vaginas look clearer. It wasn’t very descriptive but I kept thinking if it was some sort of a vaginal peeling. If so, the skin of that region probably gets more sensitive and one might need to use vaginal sunblock, right? Especially if there is too much exposition to daylight.
Concerning this whole subject, I’m very much like Charotte of SaTC. I should take a mirror and examine myself down there. The fact there are women that know themselves enough to actually wish their stuff were prettier-looking is fascinating to me. And maybe a little envy-inducing.
If my vagina is a mystery to me, others are just plain disgusting. That thing is just not aesthetically pleasing. It’s so full of layers and hidden skin and… ew. I get goose pumps, not in a good way. It kinda seems like a job undone that needs finishing. Maybe some painting or paper wall, I don know.
Maybe women’s vanity and care about appearance is meant to compensate the unattractiveness of their… thing. It’s kind of unfair, really. Women are so pretty! Objectively speaking, they are in general prettier than men. Their faces… and breasts are undeniably beautiful. That whole package wrapped in their adorableness mixed with fandom obsession can make a straight girl like me sometimes consider… But then, if I ended up in bed with one of my gender she would have to keep her panties on. And let’s face it that would make it hard to close the deal.
(Oh, I just thought about the possibility of going down on a woman… Ew! Ew! Ew! Again, goose pumps. Poor men, really. And God bless lesbians - at least it’s a shared suffering.)
On the other hand, penises and their accessories are not necessarily pretty but they are honest. No deceiveness there. It is what it is, no surprise gadgets. It’s a one page instruction book device. Easy to please, simple, practical. The perfect metaphor for its gender. Gotta love that.