(no subject)
i feel that since the beginning of october my life has been plagued by ambiguity. never really sure and never very clear. i had some serious talks last night, but it never feels like i got to say everything i needed to say. i spend the next day (today) asking myself the questions that i thought were answered, but definitely were not. its hard for me to piece it together into words without being a nervous wreck. it does feel good to push myself and address the issues that have been on my mind for so long. its also nice to finally hear an apology for the way i was treated. yeah, the situation was handled poorly, but i all ready knew that. and i all ready knew that he had to figure it out and make his own mistakes before recognizing the error in his ways. maybe ill be more forward this time around. now is the time in life to make big changes right? i gotta start somewhere.