its been great
Well severely neglected live journal I’m back. So I sit here in front of my computer at 11:30 at night on the first day of the rest of my life and to summarize my emotions would take an eternity. For four solid straight years I said I would have given anything to get out of High School. I envied every graduating class and said to myself "one day that will be you." Senior year hits, I have overcome the biggest hurdle in my entire life, had the best experiences of my life and I have accomplished so much. The whole year I was just yearning for that last day, to finally be more then a Commack High School student. All of my friends are asking me what it feels like and why am I not upset. I could only answer that i’m just ready. Little did I know that could not have been more of a lie. It’s Monday of my last day of school and i’m at IHOP with my usual group of friends and for a split second I think of all the times we have spent together. I realize that it might never be like this again. Then my plate of chocolate chip pancakes arrive and these thoughts are rushed away by the chocolaty goodness. I arrive at school and am in good spirits. Just strolling around the hallways with the rest of my class saying farewells to my favorite teachers and sharing hugs and signing of yearbooks with my friends. I finally make my way down the music hallway, my home for the past 4 years. I honestly expected it to hit me then but nothing. The bell rings for 9th period and I’m sitting in the band room. That’s when it hit me, that this is the last day I will have class in this school for this music department. The definition of conflict arose inside of me and I felt true sorrow about leaving for the first time. How could I feel sorrow for leaving the one place I wanted to leave for so long? The bell rang for the last time and I couldn’t comprehend my emotions. After school I had interviews for drum majors and sections leaders for marching band. Once again I was in such conflict because my pride and joy, the Commack High School Marching Band, was having a new era ushered in. At the conclusion of the meeting I walked to my car. To be honest I sat on top of my car and watched the school for about 40 minutes. In these 40 minutes I figured it out. The remorse I felt was not leaving the school, it was leaving the people, the memories. I was never running away from being a Commack high school student because I was so much more. I feared being something that I never was, Just a student.
The high school was merely a medium for my experiences. (That is not to say the high school is bad a place, I learned allot in this place and hey without it I would have never had these experiences.) What I am going to miss the home that Commack High School has become. In middle school I was not exactly the man I am today. (I can say man because as of Saturday I am 18, RAD.) I was a bit of a rebel and not exactly the nicest person. I decided around 8th grade that my goal in high school would to be a friend to ever person in high school that would let me be that. I am now a graduated senior in high school and I think I made that promise a reality.
After senior awards the top comment I got besides congratulations, was something to the effect of " Sean, did you hear your class cheer for you?. It was amazing!" Now due to the fact that I had what many have called a "Grammy moment" in which you hear your name after an award and can’t hear another thing afterward I cannot say I know this for a fact. If this where to be fact, there is no greater award. If I could have done enough to have that many wonderful individuals have such a respect for me to cheer I can honestly say that’s a job well done. To the seniors of the class of 08' I say thank you. Thank you for not only being the most amazing group of people I ever met, but thank you for making me feel sorrow for leaving. The experiences shared, the people I have met cause me to feel grief in leaving. The most glorious grief one individual could feel. To all others in the Commack community, staff at Commack high school, and fellow students below my class included, I thank all of you for the same effect. I felt it necessary to address you separately because it was not really in any benefit of you to make me regret leaving. Never the less many of you have come through and done that. Many of the words and lessons of my teachers in high school will stay with me forever, may it be for school or just for life. In the same regard many of the teachers as individuals will be, hopefully, my friends in the future. To the students below my grade that have affected me you are truly special. To take the time to befriend or let me befriend you as a younger individual is really something special. However corny this is, you are the future, and to be honest I feel more then comfortable leaving the school in the hands of you. However much you might not agree, you run this school and you are all more then capable of doing great things. You where all just as much a classmate and friend to me as my fellow graduating classmates.
To conclude this I return to my fellow classmates graduating. To say that I am proud of us understatement, we made it. I would retell the endless memories we have but A) there is not enough room for it and B) allot of them not all of us share. That is what makes them special. As individuals I have memories with all you. Things only we can share as people, and that’s what makes us such an amazing group. I love all of you and to wish you all success would be pointless to be honest. Its in your hands now and from experience I know you all can achieve it without my wishes (I also take into consideration that I have no superpowers and that wishes would most likely have no bearing on the outcome of your success.) I wish I had superpowers..... Well, goodbye Commack, and with that I greet my new life which I’m sure will be just as fantastic as these past 4 years have been if I choose to make it that way.
Seniors 08' No regretzzz
The high school was merely a medium for my experiences. (That is not to say the high school is bad a place, I learned allot in this place and hey without it I would have never had these experiences.) What I am going to miss the home that Commack High School has become. In middle school I was not exactly the man I am today. (I can say man because as of Saturday I am 18, RAD.) I was a bit of a rebel and not exactly the nicest person. I decided around 8th grade that my goal in high school would to be a friend to ever person in high school that would let me be that. I am now a graduated senior in high school and I think I made that promise a reality.
After senior awards the top comment I got besides congratulations, was something to the effect of " Sean, did you hear your class cheer for you?. It was amazing!" Now due to the fact that I had what many have called a "Grammy moment" in which you hear your name after an award and can’t hear another thing afterward I cannot say I know this for a fact. If this where to be fact, there is no greater award. If I could have done enough to have that many wonderful individuals have such a respect for me to cheer I can honestly say that’s a job well done. To the seniors of the class of 08' I say thank you. Thank you for not only being the most amazing group of people I ever met, but thank you for making me feel sorrow for leaving. The experiences shared, the people I have met cause me to feel grief in leaving. The most glorious grief one individual could feel. To all others in the Commack community, staff at Commack high school, and fellow students below my class included, I thank all of you for the same effect. I felt it necessary to address you separately because it was not really in any benefit of you to make me regret leaving. Never the less many of you have come through and done that. Many of the words and lessons of my teachers in high school will stay with me forever, may it be for school or just for life. In the same regard many of the teachers as individuals will be, hopefully, my friends in the future. To the students below my grade that have affected me you are truly special. To take the time to befriend or let me befriend you as a younger individual is really something special. However corny this is, you are the future, and to be honest I feel more then comfortable leaving the school in the hands of you. However much you might not agree, you run this school and you are all more then capable of doing great things. You where all just as much a classmate and friend to me as my fellow graduating classmates.
To conclude this I return to my fellow classmates graduating. To say that I am proud of us understatement, we made it. I would retell the endless memories we have but A) there is not enough room for it and B) allot of them not all of us share. That is what makes them special. As individuals I have memories with all you. Things only we can share as people, and that’s what makes us such an amazing group. I love all of you and to wish you all success would be pointless to be honest. Its in your hands now and from experience I know you all can achieve it without my wishes (I also take into consideration that I have no superpowers and that wishes would most likely have no bearing on the outcome of your success.) I wish I had superpowers..... Well, goodbye Commack, and with that I greet my new life which I’m sure will be just as fantastic as these past 4 years have been if I choose to make it that way.
Seniors 08' No regretzzz